Posted on 11/22/2007 7:22:59 AM PST by PJ-Comix
When does an MSM columnist sound just as wacky as the moonbats posting comments to his online story? It happens when a Washington Post columnist completely politicizes the annual story of the President pardoning a turkey by using it as a launchpad for his BDS (Bush Derangement Syndrome) rantings. Such was the case with WaPo columnist, Dana Milbank, who just couldn't resist letting his venom drip on Thanksgiving dinner with his COLUMN titled, "Pardon Me!" This is part of a growing trend by the Left to politicize EVERYTHING, even something as innocuous as pardoning Thanksgiving turkeys which is really done for the benefit of the kids. I now await Milbank to politicize the Christmas tree lighting by the president with some dopey comment about how global warming is killing the trees that Bush is lighting or something stupid like that. So let us now watch Dana Milibank proceed to let his hate burn a hole in his stomach in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, wishing all (even bleedinglib) a HAPPY Thanksgiving with all the trimmings, is in the [brackets]:
Pardon Me!
[As soon as I read that title, I knew Milbank would somehow drag Scooter Libby into it. I was not disappointed as you shall see.]
The annual pardoning of the Thanksgiving turkey has gained new attention since President Bush allowed the administration's most famous almost jailbird, vice presidential aide I. Lewis "Scooter" Libby, to fly the coop.
[Milbank's severe BDS shows itself in the very FIRST sentence.]
Members of the White House press corps strutted their stuff as they awaited Bush in the Rose Garden yesterday. Somebody said the two birds should be named "Scooter" and "Libby."
[...And in the second sentence.]
Another proposal: "Ramos" and "Compean" -- the two imprisoned border agents whose pardons CNN's Lou Dobbs fervently seeks.
Ken Herman of Cox News feared that Bush would ship the birds off to Gitmo, where they would be "water-basted." Another reporter, in an allusion to the president's low poll ratings, wondered whether there would be difficulty figuring out which one is the turkey.
[So Ken Herman of Cox News is also stewing in the BDS venom.]
But Bush played it straight. "They are 'May' and 'Flower,' " he dubbed the 45-pound tom turkeys.
How sweet. How tame.
[How bitter. Wow! Milbank just can't let up. Continue with your leftwing politicizing of a traditional holiday event...]
Then he added a bit of presidential mischief. "They're certainly better than the names the vice president suggested, which was 'Lunch' and 'Dinner,' " Bush said, to appreciative laughter.
[A very brief respite here from Milbank. However, he won't disappoint as he returns to the BDS theme...]
The best names, considering the birds' itinerary, may have been, to borrow Bush's old joke about his base, "Have" and "Have More." At a time when nearly 40 million Americans live in poverty, the wholesome ceremony for the annual turkey-pardoning has managed to turn into yet another display of American excess.
[I wonder if Milbank would make such dopey comments if there is ever another Democrat President. Somehow I think not.]
From the White House, the birds were driven in a police-escorted motorcade to Dulles Airport, where they were whisked to a private room in the United Airlines Red Carpet Club, before going to Gate C17 to board a United flight to Orlando, where they will be grand marshals of a Disney parade.
[Instead of being shipped off to Gitmo to be "water-basted."]
"They're going to Disney World!" announced the stickers on the turkeys' kennels.
[...To watch Dana Milbank in leftwing Fantasyland.]
According to their first-class boarding tickets, "Turkey One" received Seats 3B and 3C, while "Turkey Two" got 1A and 1B. The plane, flown by a chicken farmer and packed with actual paying customers in coach, was renamed "United Turkey One, Flight 6519."
[Better to be sitting next to a turkey on a flight than next to Dana Milbank and his BDS rantings.]
It was, quite literally, first-class treatment, but the scene still ruffled feathers at People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals. The group sent Bush a letter asking him to send the birds not to Disney World but to a "credible farmed-animal sanctuary."
[And deprive the turkeys of the opportunity to hang out with Mickey and Donald?]
"Most of the turkeys pardoned in the past several years have died less than a year after the ceremony," PETA pleaded.
[Because they are fed so well. Let us now tackle the grave problem of turkey obesity.]
PETA has a point. Like Americans themselves, commercial turkeys are raised to be overweight; bred to have enormous breasts, they find it almost impossible to fly. And putting these creatures into cages and whisking them off to Florida on an Airbus A320 has all the hallmarks of a CIA operation.
[Milbank is actually starting to sound like a self-parody.]
On the other hand, it beats becoming deli meat to have the president invite you to the White House, pet you on the back a few times and send you off with a wish that you spend the rest of your days "in blissful gobbling."
[A lot of leftwing loons would prefer to become deli meat than to have Bush pat them on the back.]
Soon after their arrival at the White House, it became clear that the turkeys have something in common with the man who would pardon them: They enjoy napping. Those watching the slothful birds suspected sedatives. The breeders said the turkeys were raised with regular exposure to people, then selected for calmness and good behavior. Whatever the cause, May sat silently in the Rose Garden (Flower waited in the truck), his snood and wattle wiggling, voicing nothing louder than a soft chirp -- until the president got to the part in his speech about those in the military who "keep us safe."
"Gobble, gobble," May interrupted.
[Goebbels, goebbles," Milbank interrupted.]
"We keep their families and their loved ones in our prayers and in our thoughts," Bush continued.
"Gobble, gobble," May repeated.
[Goebbels, goebbles," Milbank repeated.]
"Thank you," said Bush. Turning to the bird, he attempted to continue the dialogue. "America's children also have a special place in our thoughts during this season -- don't you agree?"
May was silent.
[Maybe May is a "life-long Republican" who suddenly turned against Bush.]
He was, perhaps, thinking of the long journey ahead of him.
[Or wondering why the BDS reporters on the scene were so ANGRY.]
With lights flashing, D.C. police on motorcycles led the turkey motorcade out to Dulles. United arranged for the birds to avoid the security line and got them a private bus to the C Terminal. There they napped in a private room, until a United employee reported a "ripe" smell in the room.
"Everybody poops," explained the Turkey One captain.
[Including WaPo columnists who poop all over a traditional holiday event.]
As the birds made their way to the gate on a baggage cart, the calm of the terminal was interrupted: "Are those turkeys?" "Oh, my goodness." "Can you say, 'Gobble gobble'?" "Oh, my God." "Where's the president?"
The president was back at the White House, preparing for a holiday of blissful gobbling.
[At least he is blissful, unlike Dana Milbank who just stuffed his Thanksgiving turkey full of bile soaked stuffing. And now on to the comments by the WaPo posties whose most deranged rantings are not the equal of Milbank's BDS screechings...]
Corny stupid jokes to go along to stupid corny foreign policy
[Posted a BDS loon trying to emulate Milbank.]
The President gives pardons to animals. . . Blackwater must be thanking its lucky star.
[Milbank is disappointed that he didn't think up this comparison of Blackwater employees to animals.]
Could Bush be trying to build up his approval rating by courting the gay vote? Not sure about Flower, but May is got to be gay?
[Only turkeys named Lance are gay for sure.]
Being a member of Ethical society, I can not condone or contemplating to accept this yearly ritual of Giving thanks to other fellow citizens with BLOOD stained hands? This practice is most obnoxious and barbaric. Killing millions of Turkeys, the most innocent and beautiful birds and eating them is insane and hellish. Further degrading and profoundly demeaning practice is the ""Pardoning of one lucky Turkey by President of the nation in white house under Media glare?? You are pardoning an innocent helpless Turkey?? What is it's crime? What is it's Sin? Rise to wisdom and don't play God.
[PETA posts are FUn to read! Get a clue PETA. Those birds wouldn't even exist in the first place if they weren't destined to be eaten. OMG! Soylent Green is turkeys!!!]
And Nero fiddled while Rome burned.
[I don't care if Rome burns. Right now I am more worried about my turkey burning.]
Nearly 40 million people represents slightly more than 13% of our population. Let us all storm the gates.
[When you loons couldn't even get enough people to form a chain to cross Constitution Ave. at a recent demonstration?]
I suspect that May's silence was due to his reflections on Bush's veto of the S-CHIP bill. Nice to see that Bush has compassion for SOME living things-- turkeys like himself.
[Actually May was pondering the effects of the Norwood-Dingell bill.]
Why doesn't Little George pardon all of us in America and then go back to Texas or Disneyland or wherever? One more year of this nightmare.
[Until the NEXT Republican president enters the White House.]
How sour. How lame.
Or, in honor of the Democrat base, "DUmb" and "DUmber."
I hope they don't run into benburch on Gay Days. He may want to do a little basting of his own.
Dana Milbank needs to join PETPB: People for the Ethical Treatment of President Bush.
Barking moonbats are raised to be overwrought; bred to have enormous hate, they find it almost impossible to keep their BDS under control.
That's the wurst.
Unlike DUmmies.
benburch gets turned on by a wiggling snood and wattle.
When it says Libby, Libby, Libby, on the gobble, gobble, gobble. . . .
Could teach Milbank a thing or two.
Even Pie-eyed Pooper Pitt.
benburch is getting out his baster. . . .
All 15 of you will run into a Perfect Rovian Storm.
DUMB AND DERANGED (The BDS Song)
Tune: "Home on the Range"
Oh, name a syndrome where the DUmmie mouths foam
Where the gloom and the doom dominate
Where tempers are frayed and offenses are laid
And the posts are all driven with hate
Oh, name a disease that has symptoms like these
Where such rage and such anger are shown
Every button you push always ends up with Bush--
It's a classic derangement syndrome!
DUmb, DUmb, and deranged!
Where the fear and the lack of hope stay
Where "Bush" is referred as a four-letter word
And the skies are all cloudy and gray
So if someone you see starts to curse randomly
And their face starts to quiver with stress
They're not having a stroke, they're just Democrat folk--
It's a case of what's called BDS
Bush Derangement Syndrome has no cure that is known
It's a chronic and terminal fate
'Cause the Diebold decree is that Chimpy will be
Re-elected in 2008!
DUmb, DUmb, and deranged!
Where the fear and the lack of hope stay
Where "Bush" is referred as a four-letter word
And the skies are all cloudy and gray
PEOPLE (WHO DON'T HATE BUSH)
Tune: "People"
People
People who don't hate Bush
Are the f*ckingest people that I hate
They're lemmings
Following their leader
And yet, lacking a full-grown brain
Dare to call us insane
For hating Bush more hotly than Hitler
DUmmies
Are very angry people
We're the angriest people in the world
Toward one person
One very evil person
A feeling deep in your bowel
Says you should curse, you should howl
Now your anger's the worst
But first be a person who hates
People
People who don't hate Bush
Are the f*ckingest people that I hate!
BDS in the head is worth two birds with a Bush...
EVERY day is “I hate Bush” Day to the loony Left.
Happy Thanksgiving, everyone. Thanks to PJ and Charles for keeping us in stitches all year.
Cooked a Heritage organic turkey, 16#, in a convection oven and as always happens, it was done an hour early but I made the giblet gravy and potatoes and dressing nice and hot and it was all wonderful. Very good taste, no yucky self basting, beautiful skin but if you’re big on breast meat, a little skimpy. Came out great. Next year, same brand of turkey but I think I’ll brine it first.
Hope you’re enjoying your turkey, PJ.
Amazing how people will look for anything to politicize.
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.