Posted on 03/24/2011 2:20:38 PM PDT by Charles Henrickson
It was supposed to be the beginning of the New Age. Obamassiah had driven the snakes out of Washington, and the Democrats controlled both houses of Congress. The Lightworker was going to lead us out of the Bushian darkness and into the bright new world of Hopenchange. All the DUmmies were singing a happy song . . .
PROG LAND IN MY MIND
Tune: "Playground in My Mind"
When the bad guys get me down
And I must stay underground
I take some drugs and soon I find
I'm in a Prog Land in my mind
Where the DUmmies laugh
And the DUmmies play
And we smoke a bong all day
My name is Michael
I'm kinda mental
I'm kinda mental
I'm on DU
My mind will travel
When things unravel
That's what I'm gonna do
Oh, the wonders that I find
In the Prog Land in my mind
In a world that ought to be
Pop your pills and follow me
Where the DUmmies laugh
And the DUmmies play
And we smoke a bong all day
My name is Willie
We tax the wealthy
We're gonna take a
Trillion or two
We're gonna make 'em
Pay for our healthcare
That's what we're gonna do
See the litle DUmmies
Living in a world that is not confined
Happy little DUmmies
In the Prog Land in my mind
See the little DUmmies
See how they play so happy
In the Prog Land in my mind
La la la la la la . . .
But something FUnnie happened on the way to Nirvana. Things got worse. So now the DUmmies are whining and moaning and not knowing who to blame. Witness this THREAD, "Why is everything in the world right now so f***ed up?" (I put "fouled" in the headline, but you know a DUmmie would really use another "F" word.)
It's the Daze of Whine and Poses in DUmmieland, where the free-floating angst is in Bolshevik Red, while the commentary of your humble guest correspondent, the wag tailoring the doggerel, Charles Henrickson--reporting that, in addition to all the other calamities in the world, DUmmie nadinbrzezinski, the world's foremost authority, has reached her tipping point and has fled DUmmieland, due to all the bullying and stalking she was getting, and is now hiding out in her bunker with her stockpiles of Triage Milk--is in the [brackets]:
Why is everything in the world right now so f***ed up?
[It's a plot--a PLOT, I tell you!--to make the Lightworker look bad!]
It has to do with molecules.
[It has to do with moles in DU.]
Most homo sapiens with power suck
[HOMOPHOBE!]
Because certain people with lots of money want it that way
[The RICH! I knew it! The Rich are so EEEVIL!!!]
It's because the Daily Show and The Colbert Report were on hiatus last week. It never fails - they take a week off and the world goes to hell in a hand basket!
[What about Cenk? Wasn't he on? That should have stopped it.]
The Result of Pessimism, Cynicism, and Fascists in our Society
[You sound kind of pessimistic and cynical about this. Are you part of the solution or part of the problem?]
It has to do with planetary alignments
[Venus is aligned with Uranus, on top of a Supermoon.]
Corporations make more money this way.
Corporations controlling all of us and our planet
[Yes, class, that of course is the correct answer: CORPORATIONS. "Bush's Fault" is past its expiration date, so the fall-back all-purpose answer is "CORPORATIONS."]
Capitalism run amok.
[Even if you ran Capitalism mok, it would still be bad!]
Us. If you sent us out to f*** up, we'd f*** up on the way.
[Heretic! We are the ones we have been waiting for!]
waterloo
[Underoo.]
SNAFU is military jargon and we're living it.
[DUFU is moletary jargon and we're loving it!]
religion, belief in deities. When people who can send spaceships out of the solar system and map the human genome still believe in omnipotent little old men sitting up in the clouds smiting some and blessing others we have serious problems.
[How someone could explore and ponder the solar system or a human genome and NOT believe that there MUST be a God who made all this--the irony is lost on this fool of a DUmmie.]
Its been there for a long time. It is just now being uncovered. It is painful, and hard to deal with.
[WHAT is, bobbolink? What is the answer?? You, you, can tell us, Bobo the Hobo, what is causing the world to be so f***ed up--and all you give us is this cryptic answer??]
Be gentle with yourself.
[AAARGH, TELL us, Bobo! Enlighten us! What is the answer? . . . Wait! Is that "it," Bobo? The world is so f***ed up because we are not being gentle with ourselves? . . . Oh, I am beginning to see! You are a regular Chauncey Gardiner!]
We use too much energy . . .
[. . . posting dumb threads on DU.]
Folks voting the wrong people into office. Folks not voting at all. Folks continuing to believe the hype machine.
[We're all folked up.]
Not enough roux
[The pot thickens.]
because life is full of f*** ups and good times-fleshed out with less extreem ones. We've been going through some pretty dark times. I'm sure that those who survived WWI, the influenza epidemic, the boom of the twenties followed by the great depression and then WWII thought things were pretty f***ed up too. wish I had the answer
[And that IS the right answer, it really is! DUmmie Bluerthanblue, I'm going to award you today's Kewpie Doll for your brilliant--although perhaps unintentionally brillant--answer!]
Califate. Califate, Califate, Califate, Califate, Califate, Califate, Califate, Califate, Califate, Califate, Califate, Califate,
[And the question is . . . What happens when death clouds from Japan waft over to San Diego and get in your milk?]
Too much cheap weed
[Things are all weed-weed up. But don't worry, I'm sure the price of weed will be going up soon, like everything else.]
Because there are republicans living on this planet.
[That's it! Send 'em all to Mars!]
Because Poppy and Babs begat a son named Junior. His eight year reign of error and terror destabilized the world. Not responsible for earthquakes, but that little son of a bitch set things in motion
[Oh, come on! You know the earthquakes are also . . . Bush's Fault!]
I wasn't anywhere around it. can't blame me, ya hear?
[DUmmie DearAbby has an alibi.]
The world has always been f***ed up. As long as people have been living in it.
[Solution: Get rid of the people, and this world will be a better place.]
i think, last decade and half, our world changed so hugely with internet and world connection and everything effects everybody. also it is all new, a huge ass experiment. in some areas it is kick ass. in some areas, not so kick ass.
[DUmmie seabeyond nails it. It is all hugely kick ass or not kick ass.]
I'm bet every civilization goes though a crazy period right after the Internet is invented
[Algore's fault.]
Because Repukes inhabit the Earth. Simple. Just think about how wonderful the world would be if they weren't here.
[Mars is too close! They might come back!]
Somehow, I suspect that it's Guy Lombardo's fault.
[That Guy. . . . But wasn't he a Canadian? Royal, I think.]
It all started when they broke up the phone company.
[All Bell broke loose.]
Bound to happen some time. Then it'll go peaceful, then crazy again.
[DUmmie HEyHEY looks at the Big Picture.]
Because next year is 2012 and the world will end. Bye.
[We're entering a Mayan field.]
Time. 2012. Return of the Great Ottus. Lucifer's Hammer. Chicken pox. The Supreme Court of The United States decided a federal election in 2000 that ripped the world a new asshole and his name was Dick Cheney. My money is on the last reason.
[Cheney Insanity Affliction (CIA) never goes out of style.]
Evil corporate-fascist, Mongol, baby eaters, hopped up on GM corn are designing union and innocent civilian-seeking missiles in their secret underground lairs under the icecaps and glaciers where they're also breeding giant mosquitoes that suck all the oil out the ground in harmless Arab nations and excrete radioactive clouds over playgrounds BLLLLAAARRRRRRR!!!!111!!!! CORPORATIONS!
[LOUSY FREEPER TROLL!!!]
Because cogent argument has been reduced to 5 second sound bites, with the word "f***" in them.
[That's DUmmie discourse in a NUtshell!]
Oh and yes, FRiends, Know-it-all Nadin, the world's foremost authority, has left DUmmieland! Will she return? Will she run out of milk before the death clouds arrive? Stay tuned. . . .
IBTP.
Pre-ping
PING!
One of those questions that I share with the DUmmies, but for drastically different reasons ;-)
But not George Soros. He would never use his wealth to foment discord.
I have to agree with them though that for a vast majority of the problems, the root cause is found when ya follow the money, often back to corporate/banking interests.
A finance oligarchy ping...
He's right, of course, but why does he say it like it's a bad thing?
But not George Soros's 501(c)3s. They would never foment discord.
I too got here before the ping. But spent my time reading. Can’t help it. It happens to me every time the world goes nuts...
BTW Charles, your puns today are exceptional! Cheers
I wonder if it's ever occurred to anti-Capitalists just how rich Geogre Soros is.
A good pun is its own reword.
I do love you.
[Venus is aligned with Uranus, on top of a Supermoon.]
Genius. So much of this was genius.
I can rarely venture there anymore. The dark angst and clueless rage just makes me lose hope.
Thanks for going.
Socialist authors promise not only wealth for all, but also happiness and love for everybody, the full physical and spiritual development of each individual, the unfolding of great artistic and scientific talents on all men, etc. The socialist paradise will be the kingdom of perfection pupulated by completely happy supermen. But libtards will never realize that it is all nonsense and delusion. And when a person has a delusion, by definition it is impossible to talk him out of it by use of reason. He must learn to endure his lot in life without looking for a scapegoat on which he can lay all the blame, and he must endeavor to grasp the fundamental laws of social cooperation on his own through self knowledge.
Nadin’s gone again??? How will I ever cope? Now I won’t know squat. Heaven help us all....
A couple of thoughts come to mind after reading this.
We here at FR seem to be of two minds about the jerk currently occupying 1600 Pennsylvania Ave. One one hand some believe, as I have, that he is a puppet put in place to destroy the US, and others believe he is an incompetent boob that wasn’t qualified to serve coffee in the White House. After reading the amount of depression coming from the DUmmies, I am starting to lean towards the latter. Not that he still couldn’t destroy the US by accident, but if he were having great success with that, they would be happier. That in itself brightens my day.
The other thought I had was that I could retire on what they spend in one year on prescribed anti-depressants. They have to be keeping some doctor’s yacht afloat. No wonder they want free health care.
Just a couple of observations on a Thursday afternoon.
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