Posted on 11/27/2019 5:22:03 PM PST by blueunicorn6
One of my favorite family traditions on Thanksgiving is the morning Crap Game. No....wait....thats Halloween. On Thanksgiving we break the bones of the old bird. Grandma cant be with us this year as shes in India hunting tigers or something, so well probably just break Uncle Steves little finger instead.
Just kidding.
Well break his index finger.
No. We will pull apart the turkeys wishbone.
I am told that this tradition originated with the Romans. They would sit around trying to guess what was under each others togas. Contrary to current thought, there were only two choices......a sword or a turkey.
Well, while putting a turkey in your toga was loads of fun, the game could get old pretty quick. I mean, once youve shown everyone your turkey, you cant just tuck it back into your toga and hope that nobody notices or remembers.
And those Romans had good memories.
Remember the ides Of March! They would tell each other.
Or maybe it was Remember the Avis Car!.
I cant remember. I guess I wouldnt make a very good Roman. But I bet Id be a dang good gladiator. Id have a fish net and that long pokey thing. Id be fighting some big guy and Id pull a flounder out of my fish net and whap him across the face with the flounder. And then Id give him a jab with that pokey thing. What do they call those three pronged things? Dentyne?
But I digress.
Pulling the wishbone.
Yes.
We take the wishbone and the oldest person grabs one end and the youngest person takes the other end. Then, they both make wishes. Usually they wish that the other person hasnt filled their pants, but sometimes you get some odd wishes.
One year, my sister wished to meet a nice doctor, and wouldnt you know it, she got a bad case of diarrhea. I know what youre thinking. What a crappy way to meet a doctor.
So the two people pull on the wishbone until it cracks. Whoever has the largest piece of bone gets their wish.
I feel that people shouldnt just be pulling wishes out of the air. Thats how the Democrats come up with policy.
Wishes should be thought out. You should be prepared before you grab that wishbone. So, in preparation, I have started this thread where you can post your Thanksgiving Wishbone Wish.
And dont be wishing for Marie Osmond because that Wish has already been taken.
‘Whirled peas’. Always.
And, that being the case, you would also probably have a second, “pre-wishbone-breaking” wish, wishing that you don’t end up with the short end of the stick (so to speak).
Thanks for the kudos. But I'm not "sir." Veto! (The Girl)
This is still America, right???
I wish for Marie Osmond!
To crush your enemies — See them driven before you, and to hear the lamentation of their women!
That my wife will let me finally have a live in massage therapist.
You need to be more specific as to the age of your live in massage therapist. Otherwise your wife may specify one that is older than rocks. ;)
Ill wish for the Miss Universe second place winner. That way I can console her for losing the title.
A thousand pardons!
How could I have been so foolish?
If you ever met my Dad you would know. Foolish doesnt just run in my family....it sprints!
Oh look!
Shes gone to Switzerland.
If you hurry, you can still catch a boat to get there!
So, basically, the same as Valentines Day.
The old John Nash, A Beautiful Mind, trick.
He won a Nobel Prize for that.
That or inventing cupcake sprinkles. I can never remember. I guess I have an ugly mind.
Guess Ill have to watch a beautiful mind now. BTW, I have a mind that works like lightning. A flash of brilliance, then darkness.
I wish I’d have
Kept my old job.
.
But it’s still work
and work Sucks.
.
How about a Trip
To
Disney Land!
Two Weeks
All inclusive
Luxury Suites with
Those little bottles
Of booze that just
Fit right in
You’re hand!
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