Posted on 01/28/2024 6:42:03 AM PST by Navy Patriot
WASHINGTON, DC — A devastating new report revealed that despite massive layoffs, thousands of journalists still remain gainfully employed.
"It's a tough pill to swallow," said researcher Stan Morgan as he announced the study's results. "Even after multiple rounds of layoffs at the Los Angeles Times, the Washington Post, and many other newspapers, it's only been a drop in the bucket. Tragically, even today, thousands of journalists have not yet been laid off."
Reports have conclusively proved the immense benefits of firing journalists, leaving researchers puzzled as to why more outlets aren't following the sterling example of the Los Angeles Times.
"We applaud the efforts of the L.A. Times and the Post to address the stain on our nation," said Morgan. "If only more newspapers would follow suit, millions of Americans could live more happy, productive lives. We must all do our part to never, ever read what journalists write. It's up to all of us."
As of publishing time, thousands of journalists had acquired new jobs at Dunkin' Donuts, where they reportedly spent their days harassing customers for not ordering black coffee.
(Excerpt) Read more at babylonbee.com ...
The laid off gerbilists could attend the Hunter BiXiden School of Art and make a living during the art of their choice.
WHAT ARE THEY WAITING FOR? Ahem, I mean, what are they waiting for?
Alas, as a group, too stupid to learn to code
Journalists (aka Reporters)?
The Press have become the Press_titutes, they do it for the money.
Many of these journalists are socialists, maybe they will apply their ideals to communist countries where they fit right in.
There are politicians who should be laid off too: When?
I know what you're gettin' at, and Reporters isn't the word I would use.
A "Reporter" REPORTS the News, and a good one tries to report the facts of Who?, What?, Why?, When?, and Where? using proper English and Grammar.
Generally, the only W that may be slightly fluid is the Why?, the rest are easily limited to factual representation.
Journalists do none of these, they simply tell the reader what and how to think. That's why I call them Urinialists.
The Press have become the Press_titutes, they do it for the money.
True, however I would like to add that I believe the biggest reason Journalists Lie is the Arrogance of Eliteism.
Aside, I do regularly credit the "Associated Presstitutes" in my comments and posts.
Thanks, Texas
That “Many” is a very large percentage.
AI needs to hunt down every last one of these leftist propagandists and remove them from their jobs.
“Do you want to leave the premises the easy way or the hard way?”
Lol.
We are on the same page.
The older I get, the less patience I have for their babble.
Thank you my FRiend.
Why should not be left to journalists. How is part of who what when where how, but how starts with h and doesn’t fit in their Dr Seuss phrasing. So they take on the why thinking it’s part of their job and it’s downhill from there.
GREAT HEADLINE !!!
As I have well explained, pretty much nothing should be left to Journalists.
Except their mother's basement.
Yes. Thousands more need to “learn to code”.
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