Posted on 02/04/2024 1:54:47 PM PST by CMS
I recently lost my wife of 16 years to cardiac failure. Her loss has been devastating. We had a fight before we went to bed and our last words were not pleasant. When the alarm went off and I rolled over and saw her laying there eyes open and motionless, I knew I lost her. I'd give ANYTHING to tell her that I 'm sorry for the fight and to tell her that I love her one more time.
I called 911 and everyone showed up, and I was treated like a criminal that potentially murdered her for 3 hours until the coroner arrived and said it was cardiac failure. After that was said everyone's demeanor towards me changed and they became more sympathetic.
She always loved the beach and we went every chance we got. One of her happiest memories was when we were on a beach at Montego Bay Jamacia
I went with a beach theme for her urn, so now I feel she's forever at the beach
Having lost my wife not long ago, I wish all the time I could be with her again to do it right and make it right. She was in every way a far better person than I, but for the thermostat. It is sadly subject to the Permanence Factor, and we cede control of eternity to God.
I hope you have better tomorrows.
Sorry for your loss. I had a similar situation with my dad. We had a falling out which was not resolved before he died suddenly. I will regret that the rest of my life.
Thank you so much for sharing that, I certainly can relate. I did get together some stuff around XMAS to donate to Goodwill, but there is just so much I still don’t want to deal with. I guess I will in the course of time. God Bless You!
Sorry to hear of your loss
We can’t control most of the things in our lives, so don’t let this eat you up. It is a lesson for everyone of us, “Be ye angry, and sin not: let not the sun go down upon your wrath” Ephesians 4:26.
Your wife knows your sorrow, and so does God, so go on and let your life honor her memory.
Very sorry for your loss.
I’m so sorry for your loss.
God bless you. He loves you. Your wife knows how you feel and is telling you she loves you and not to worry.
One Tuesday afternoon over 40 years ago, I came over to dad’s and had a big argument with him.
Just a 28-year-old punk who thought he knew more than his dad and decided to out argue the 65-year-old, “old man”. As I shouted him down and went to leave, feeling like I’d put him in his place, I looked back over my shoulder and my dad was looking off into the distance with a forlorn look on his face. The next Saturday night he had a massive heart attack and died. That Tuesday argument was the last time I ever saw him. I’ve now outlived by more than 4 years. He was 10 times the man I am.
Typing this now tears are running down my cheeks. I wish he was here now so I could tell him I’m sorry.
We are human, we make mistakes, we hopefully learn. We all make mistakes. Some things will always hurt. We just do our best from here on. Forgive yourself. Reach out any time.
In my marriage, we sometimes do go to bed angry, or maybe annoyed is a better word. After a few years of trying not to go to sleep that way, I realized my husband would usually be in a better mood in the morning and it would blow over or at least be discussed civilly. Just saying, I know how that could happen and I sympathize!
May He bless and keep you, as well.
If you haven’t done so, ask the Lord to forgive you, and learn to forgive yourself. That’s the hard part. God forgives as soon as we ask; we’re harder on ourselves than He is. I’m sorry for your loss.
I don’t really believe in “signs” much, but reading your post tonight has meant a lot. I have been so angry at my husband all evening (over basically nothing). Suddenly I’m not very angry.
Please accept my condolences on the loss of your wife. God bless you.
Very sorry for your loss and all you went through when it happened. The saying and beach image seem a good choice and calming.
God forgives all who sincerely ask. Most important is that He and you make amends for any fight with your wife. His forgiveness helps ease all else.
prayers for you and all the family.
Sorry for your loss. It’s a hard walk, and I sympathize.
How long has it been? You sound like you’re in an early stage.
I lost my wife 2 1/3 years ago, so I get it. Hers was a cardiac rupture. She had gotten up to go to “the little people’s room,” as she called it, and fallen down. I tried to get her back to bed, but she fell again.
From what you’ve written, I’d say you’ve done an excellent job of honoring her.
It’s difficult, especially early, and everyone grieves differently, but the one thing I will tell you is to make sure you get plenty of support. That is critical.
If you’d like to talk, I’m available.
I have recommended griefshare often. Great classes. 👍
She passed in November
Compared the eternal and indescribable joy and peace she enjoys in heaven, that is to say in the grand scheme of things, that fight is really of no consequence.
And that is a beautiful thing you did to honor her memory, and to remember the best times you enjoyed together.
Bless you, and be at peace.
You’re at a very early stage yet.
Thank you kindly.
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