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10 Famous Presidential Quotes If All Presidents Spoke Like Joe Biden
The Babylon Bee ^ | April 24 2024 | The Babylon Bee

Posted on 04/25/2024 8:39:48 AM PDT by xp38

Have you ever noticed that Joe Biden has a funny way of speaking? From his endearing way of retelling events that never happened to his uncanny ability to make up new words on the spot, it's a fascinating testament to his abilities as a communicator. If only other presidents throughout history could do the same thing!

The Babylon Bee is here to provide the following glimpse at what it would have been like if other presidents spoke like Joe Biden:

"Four score and seven… eight hundred… sixty-five million… billion million… years… anyway…": Honest Abe spitting numbers Joe Biden style is how it should be done.

"Mr. Gorbachev, tear down this...uh, you know... the thing!": A truly powerful moment in history from Ronald Reagan.

"We choose to go to the moon not because it is easy but because my uncle was eaten by cannibals. True story, folks.": The space race was never the same after this gem from JFK.

"Look, fat, get off my plane!": Who could forget this classic line from President Harrison Ford?

"Yesterday, December 47th, a day that will live in infamanarathgary, America was attacked by the air and naval forces of the Empire of Mexico.": Franklin D. Roosevelt with one of the nation's most somber messages.

"Ask not what your country can do for you… ask… ask what… ask not what you can do for… ask things.": John F. Kennedy with an inspiring word from a golden era of history.

"That depends on what the definition of 'start quote' is 'end quote' is.": Bill Clinton got himself out of hot water with this shrewd observation.

"Read my lips. No... new... hotel junk fees!": George H.W. Bush telling us all how to be prudent.

"Speak softly and carry...ah...well, anyway.": The encapsulation of Teddy Roosevelt's foreign policy that has guided us for decades.

"The only thing we have to fear is... pause.": No wonder FDR got himself elected an unprecedented four times.


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: babylonbee
The Bee!
1 posted on 04/25/2024 8:39:48 AM PDT by xp38
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To: xp38

Well played by the Bee!!!

I am looking forward to the 10 Famous Presidential Quotes If All Presidents Spoke Like Kamala Harris.


2 posted on 04/25/2024 8:46:06 AM PDT by Magnum44 (...against all enemies, foreign and domestic... )
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To: xp38

Excellent.


3 posted on 04/25/2024 8:48:26 AM PDT by MayflowerMadam (Navarro didn't kill himself.)
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To: xp38

LOL!

(Especially the Bill Clinton one.)


4 posted on 04/25/2024 8:48:39 AM PDT by Jamestown1630 ("A Republic, if you can keep it.")
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To: Magnum44
"We choose to go to the Moon...you know, the Moon, that big light in the sky...not the really big light, that's the Sun Mr. Sun is too hot to go to but we can certainly do the Moon if we try hard enough! Let's put our minds to it, okay? Ha, ha, ha..."
5 posted on 04/25/2024 8:53:02 AM PDT by Deo volente ("When we see the image of a baby in the womb, we glimpse the majesty of God's creation." Pres. Trump)
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To: Magnum44
I am looking forward to the 10 Famous Presidential Quotes If All Presidents Spoke Like Kamala Harris.

If Kamala Harris had a band, they would have to release an album called "Word Salad Surgery."

6 posted on 04/25/2024 9:02:12 AM PDT by Disambiguator
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To: Disambiguator
If Kamala Harris had a band, they would have to release an album called "Word Salad Surgery."

Now, now. You owe an apology to ELP. And incidentally, Dr. John.

7 posted on 04/25/2024 9:07:32 AM PDT by Bloody Sam Roberts (Perfection is impossible. But if you pursue perfection...you may achieve excellence.)
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To: xp38

I would love to hear these quotes spoken by a F-Joe Biden impersonator!


8 posted on 04/25/2024 9:10:17 AM PDT by glennaro (2024: The Year of The Reckoning, lest our Republic succumb to the "progressive" disease of the Left)
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To: xp38

Truman speaking Biden-ease would have said, “The buck stops here so I can get my 10% cut.”


9 posted on 04/25/2024 9:22:09 AM PDT by Tell It Right (1st Thessalonians 5:21 -- Put everything to the test, hold fast to that which is true.)
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To: Magnum44

They might have to limit that to five quotes.


10 posted on 04/25/2024 9:34:03 AM PDT by gundog (It was a bright cold day in April, and the clocks were striking thirteen. )
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To: Magnum44

Kamala? That makes me cackle.


11 posted on 04/25/2024 9:47:39 AM PDT by Fledermaus (Is it me, or all of a sudden have the buried trolls come out on FR like cicadas? It's all noise.)
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To: xp38
Babylon Bee Video: Introducing The Biden Bible Translation
12 posted on 04/25/2024 9:55:57 AM PDT by Heartlander
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To: xp38

“Ich bin ein Butter Pecan!”


13 posted on 04/25/2024 10:39:50 AM PDT by bigbob
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