Posted on 10/14/2022 5:02:07 PM PDT by DFG
AUSTIN, TX — In a landslide victory during a special statewide referendum this week, Texans overwhelmingly voted to have a giant airship pick up Austin via tow cables and drop the city off in California.
As the city is mostly inhabited by Californians who left their state due to the cost of living, high taxes, and crime - and then proceeded to vote for the same policies in Texas - the move is just "setting things right" by sending immigrants from the Golden State "back where they belong," according to the bill's sponsors.
The act took effect immediately, and a massive, lumbering dirigible slowly crawled over the city, its ominous shadow eclipsing the coffee shops, microbreweries, and vegan hemp handbag stores below. Liberals screamed and attempted to flee, but it was too late. Harpoon cannons blasted massive steel cables into the Pennybacker Bridge, the Independent skyscraper, and various other anchor points throughout the city. The airship then rose into the sky, lifting the city along with millions of Austin progressives thousands of feet into the air.
"Oh no!" cried recent Texas transplants Timpani and Steve Strudelfudd as the ground shook and they nearly fell off their electric scooters in downtown Austin. "This is, like, totally, like, one of those earthquake things from back home! Hold onto your lattes!"
The city was safely transported back to California and dropped off in a nice rural area north of Santa Clarita. Texas is once again safely red, and many Austin residents reportedly don't even realize they've been transported to California.
As for any progressive transplants still living in Texas, Governor Abbott has vowed to continue secret midnight flights of these liberals back to their home countries of California, Washington, and Oregon.
If only it were true
Ha!
I hope the airship was electric.
We need to get the Spin-Dizzys from Mayor John Amalfi and get that sucker airborne.
I think a few are gun carrying cowboys.
Short clip—very funny
Move from California to Texas: Guns frighten liberals:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HlDWzN6TW5Y
Love the BEE!!!!
Bookmark.
Austin used to be a cool cowboy/hippie town in the 70’s and 80’s. Then silicon valley companies started relocating there and it became liberal and quite insane. It has only gotten worse. I miss the old Austin.
They should split it between Nantucket and MV.
I could provide a hundred links, but just put anything outrageous in your browser with Oregon and see what comes up. For a start, Oregon will put tampon machines in all boys’ restrooms in public schools, and public schools can no longer require competence in reading, writing and math as criteria for high school graduation.
Californians need to recognize just ONE basic fact
They are REFUGEES; they are not MISSIONARIES
Exactly what I thought when I saw the title
Yes! that would be wonderful, indeed!
I lived there in 73-74, it was great.
The original Armadillo, Soap Creek Saloon, Dirties hamburger joint, Nothing Strikes Back, there was always something to do.
.
Leave 6th street and ZZ-TOP
Don’t forget The Broken Spoke … it’s still going. Surrounded by 3-5 story condos/appts. And what’s a few blocks down the road… an In and Out. Makes the californicators feel right at home.
Here is a better idea: How about Texas stop bussing their homeless into California? And also how about Texas stop complaining when leftists from their state who invaded California decide to move back home?
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