Posted on 09/01/2009 10:06:51 PM PDT by Brian_Baldwin
When I was a young teenager, I would like to pick up Reader’s Digest and steal a joke from the digest to share with others. I imagined myself a Johnny Carson. Of course that was long time ago, and now I am excited about Jay Leno’s new show and have marked down the date so that I can record the show for a keepsake to share with others.
Lately I heard that Reader’s Digest is going bankrupt. Not sure of all the details, but it this came to mind when I noticed a Reader’s Digest for sale at the check stand of my local grocery store.
Thinking, if I can do my part by purchasing a copy, why not? Reader’s Digest brought me some good laughs from its joke department.
Sure enough, I open it up at home and this edition has “The World’s Funniest Joke’s” contest, different countries represented with a joke from each as selected by the famous comedian Sid Caesar.
Brazil was funny, so was India. But HANDS DOWN, the winner was the good ol’ USA (of course – because we always have the best jokes and the best comedians … like Bob Hope for example!).
I mean the opening line itself makes me laugh without even getting to the punch line, it’s such American genre classic in it’s setting and delivery - and I got to share it with you:
“A priest, a minister, and a rabbi” (I’m already laughing, sorry, I got to start over) …
“A priest, a minister, and a rabbit want to see who’s best at the job. So they each go into the woods, find a bear …” (I’m sorry… really, I am laughing again… start over) …
… “so they each go into the woods, find a bear, and attempt to convert it. Later they get together.”
“The priest begins: ‘When I found the bear, I read to him from the Catechism and sprinkled him with holy water. Next week is his First Communion.’”
“’I found the bear by the stream,’ says the minister, ‘and preached God’s Holy Word. The bear was so mesmerized that he let me baptize him.’”
“They both look down at the rabbi, who is lying on a gurney in a body cast …”
… sorry, I’m laughing again …
“’Looking back’, he says, ‘maybe I shouldn’t have started with the circumcision’”.
That is funny, I don’t care who you are!
My dog doesn’t have a nose!
How does it smell?
Awful!
Sorry about the typo’s, I was laughing while typing. Is that a crime in California? Also, I like some of your all jokes, too.
What’s blue and is between 3 and 4?
Monty Python: World’s Funniest Joke:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LhmnOpoGAPw
Beat me by 20 seconds!
As a baptized Methodist who reasoned my way to a life free of mythology as a career path or a life’s goal, I find such jokes unamusing, especially when told by someone who can’t even step over the corpses he leaves in his wake; I think I’d rather drink disappearing ink.
The kid isn’t leaking-— he’s just all wee-wee’d up!
A few years back when a circulating news item was about the “world’s funniest joke” (the “make sure he’s dead” one often cited), I was approached at random by a TV crew on the street asking about it. Not knowing which joke it was, nor which way they would spin it (”so, you think using guns for murder is funny?” was my fear), I declined giving the man-on-the-street interview. Maybe I’ve seen too many such interviews edited/depicted as “hey, look, he’s stupid!”
My parents had a subscription, it helped me to learn to read. 'Steal' was spelled with two 'e's... and
If that's an example of RDigest best joke, the pages must be laced with drugs.
Thanks for posting that. I was so depressed tonight thinking about the economy,
the wars, global warming, my savings, Social Security, my credit card
debt..... I called Lifeline.
Got a freakin’ call center in Pakistan. I told them I was suicidal
and they got all excited and asked if I could drive a truck.
Now THAT is funny!!
ROFLMAO!
LOL
My wife and I took out life insurance policies on each other — so now it’s just a waiting game.
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