[GraceG]

[blueunicorn6]

What constitutes “excessive workplace flatulence”?

“OK, Gene, here are the federal rules on farting. You can have three pants-splitters a day. You are only allowed one skunk-squeezer. And nothing that will leave a brown stripe in your underwear. Now, this does not include the state farting laws of Maryland, which, I’m told, really stink.”

[uglybiker]

Okay, we've got an official reprimand for a Federal employee who is full of gas.

When are we going to see reprimends for Federal employees who are full of sh*t?

[xrmusn]

Obviously he should either be the elevator operator OR restroom attendant.

He needs ‘people exposure’ to ferret out the weaklings and force them to retire, thereby saving the Govt money.

:Here I sit, broken hearted,
Paid to $hit and only farted:

[P.O.E.]

An in-law, while in England during WWII, was coming back to base after a night of leave, and was arrested for relieving himself on the side of the road. I wish we had a copy of the citation which read:

“Urinating on the King’s Highway”

[Route395]

Work place flatulence?...Just fire back with a few bad Mexican burritos!...Don’t get mad get even! Just start your own Air Biscuit Air Force!

[Gay State Conservative]

I recently applied for SS (the regular kind,not SSI/SSDI) and had the misfortune of talking on the phone to the rudest government employee imaginable.And to think that four of this nation’s five richest counties aren’t suburbs of NYC...Chicago...LA...Philly...Dallas...but Washington DC,the *one* major US city that produces *nothing* of value.

[the OlLine Rebel]

Is this really serious? Not satire?

I can tell you Gas-X is not going to work. Maybe Gaviscon (I haven’t tried, although I think it’s more stomach-centered than intestines-centered). I have lots of chronic digestive disease, and occasionally I have gas inside so bad it’s really painful. Gas-X relieves that, if you know what I mean.

[the OlLine Rebel]

ping for MD

[SledgeCS]

I work with a guy that we refer to as “The King of Flatulence”. We have learned to avoid his area whenever he eats his favorite lunch, jambalaya pizza and deep fried cauliflower. For his joke Christmas present this year he got a customized large Depends diaper lined with activated charcoal. Everyone was cracking up including him, but all that did was turn on the gas full stream. Thank goodness smoking is not allowed anywhere in the building.

[Road Glide]

This whole story stinks.

[Tolerance Sucks Rocks]

Maryland “Freak State” PING!

[I Drive Too Fast]

This article from The Smoking Gun brought to you by the "Smoking Bun".

What is the workers name? Gaseous Clay? Fartholomew? Stinky Pete?

[YHAOS]

On this one, the one-liners just write themselves.