Pink Coconut Marshmallow Cakes

Date: Now | Author: Me

[Lazamataz]

You know those pink coconut marshmallow cakes you find on convenience store shelves...? If you get too many of them together in close proximity, critical mass is reached and an explosion ensues.

The explosion creates tens of new pink coconut marshmallow cakes per cake found on the shelf. This, in turn, causes another explosion, which occurs a few hours, when the cakes heat up again. This is known by Military EOD specialists and government teams dedicated to controlling these outbreaks, as a Pink Coconut Marshmallow Cake Event (PCMCE).

In the effort to make these dangerous snacks more acceptable, Hostess renamed the product, from the "Dangerous Spontaneously Exploding Coconut Marshmallow Cakes" to the less-threatening "Sno-Balls".

If you have never heard of the nanobot "Grey Fog" scenario, let me explain it: If you release a nanobot that has, as its only purpose, the collection of raw materials to fashion more nanobots, who in turn create more nanobots, the entire planet will become a 'grey fog' of nanobots. Like the Nanobot 'Grey Fog' scenario, the pink coconut marshmallow cake self-perpetuating explosion is a very real, very serious problem. There are three cases of it, right now, that authorities are trying to control:

1. One, Area 51, was once a small sleepy town called Carlstown, until a convenience store clerk mistakenly placed four of the cakes in close proximity. In response the government quickly erected Area 51 to contain the crisis. They spread rumors about UFOs, and called the Area a secret testing facility. So far -- until this expose' -- the secret has held.

2. Another occurred in the 1980's in Chernobyl, Ukraine. Several boxes of pink coconut marshmallow cakes were smuggled from the West, but without proper instructions translated from English, the clerks allowed the cakes to sit in a warehouse without the proper lead shielding. Once the cakes erupted, the Ukrainian government tried, unsuccessfully, to wipe out the cakes by overloading a nuclear reactor. All that happened is that they have millions of radioactive pink coconut marshmallow cakes.

3. Finally, a PCMCE occurred in the south of France in 2011. This occurred with the white-colored version of the cake. The French authorities were able to airlift the entire convenience store to the Antarctic, where the increase in mass is mistakenly attributed to ice growth. Closer satellite observation reveals millions of tiny little white coconut marshmallow cakes, and somehow the outcome meshed well with their colloquial name: Sno-Balls.

This is a serious problem. We will need funding to contain it. Please lobby your Senator and Congressman to fund the PCMCE Containment fund today!

Note the specialist carefully handling this dangerous product. Please note he is aligning the dangerous cake with the polar magnetic lines. This tends to minimize the risk of a PCMCE.

DO NOT ATTEMPT THIS ON YOUR OWN WITHOUT PROPER TRAINING!

[Lazamataz]

Ping

[Lazamataz]

Ping

[Lazamataz]

I am sure you have some tales about PCMCE’s, from your days in EOD.

[Jack Hydrazine]

White Calgary mom hopes community BBQ will stop her family from being ‘racially slurred’
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-chat/3293317/posts

“They have racially slurred my children,” France said. “They’ve called my children ‘white crackers,’ one boy that I found out called (my daughter) a ‘marshmallow’...”

[Lazamataz]

He’s pink. He’s called a marshmallow. This is clearly a reference to the Pink Coconut Marshmallow Cake threat.

[who_would_fardels_bear]

Even as a child I knew to stay clear of those creepy looking things.

I think the movie The Blob was based on an incident in the Midwest where a truck carrying a load of Sno-Balls slid off an icy road releasing the entire truckload into the open. The cover story that it came from outerspace was just that.

[Darksheare]

Undead Thread Public Announcement ping.

[smokingfrog]

And whatever you do, don't cross the streams...

[null and void]

Ding Dongs are so deadly...

...they arranged for the unions to shut the whole company down!

[Old Sarge]

Actually, the phenomenon is referred to as a Pink Coconut Marshmallow Event (PCME) or pronounced “Pick ME”.

Thereby creating a subliminal craving.

See how that works?

Now, where’s the Quik-E-Mart?

[Berlin_Freeper]

Sno Balls were first introduced in 1947

[Lazamataz]

When they said junk food would kill ya, I never expected it to be so literal.

[no-to-illegals]

snowballs ... ping

[null and void]

Nobody expects The Spanish Inquisition!

[null and void]

Yeah. Roswell.

[Lazamataz]

Sno Balls were first introduced in 1947

Right around the time of the creation of Area 51.

Coincidence? I THINK NOT.

Well, at least we got our introduction to the dangers of PCMCE's out in a remote area, and early on, so that we could involve the Atomic Energy Commission and formulate hard regulations for the distribution of these dangerous products.

[Honorary Serb]

...pink coconut marshmallow cakes....

Sounds like the only appropriate type of cake for a “gay” “wedding”!!!!

[Rebelbase]

I forgot how much I like snoballs and now I’m jonesing for some.

I hate you.

[Moonman62]

There was a time when Hostess made really delicious cakes that could be bought at the 7-11. At least I think it was Hostess.