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Environmentalist and actor Ricardo Torres marries tree
The Strait Times ^
| 5/11/2016
| staff
Posted on 05/24/2016 2:11:13 PM PDT by bkopto
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1
posted on
05/24/2016 2:11:13 PM PDT
by
bkopto
To: bkopto
The happy couple is registered at Lumber Barn.
2
posted on
05/24/2016 2:13:22 PM PDT
by
Hillarys Gate Cult
(Liberals make unrealistic demands on reality and reality doesn't oblige them.)
To: bkopto
Has he divorced the previous seven trees? Or is guilty of polygatree?
3
posted on
05/24/2016 2:15:25 PM PDT
by
Hieronymus
( (It is terrible to contemplate how few politicians are hanged. --G. K. Chesterton))
To: bkopto
This is the 8th tree he’s married. I hope they all have good lawyers, charge him with bigamy and make him pay child support for all their saplings for the next 100 years.
4
posted on
05/24/2016 2:16:22 PM PDT
by
euram
To: bkopto
“I think that I shall never see....”
5
posted on
05/24/2016 2:16:25 PM PDT
by
dfwgator
To: bkopto
Did he get a woodie on the honeymoon?
6
posted on
05/24/2016 2:22:25 PM PDT
by
Drango
(A liberal's compassion is limited only by the size of someone else's wallet.)
To: Drango
Yes, he had a woodie for some ash.
7
posted on
05/24/2016 2:23:54 PM PDT
by
TexasRepublic
(Socialism is the gospel of envy and the religion of thieves. Socialism is governmental theft!)
To: bkopto
Come on folks, this is kinda sappy . . . .
8
posted on
05/24/2016 2:24:21 PM PDT
by
snooter55
(People may doubt what you say, but they will always believe what you do)
To: snooter55
“In my family tree, I’m the sap.” - Rodney Dangerfield
9
posted on
05/24/2016 2:26:04 PM PDT
by
dfwgator
To: bkopto
What's wrong with him tying the knot with a tree? We all wanna put down roots, am I right?
Whew, gives new meaning to the family tree though, doesn't it?
This guy's gotten married 8 times? How does he know? Does he count the rings?
Somebody stop me!
No, really, stop me.
To: bkopto
Now we learn what knotholes are for?
11
posted on
05/24/2016 2:26:24 PM PDT
by
faithhopecharity
("Politicians are not born. They're excreted." Marcus Tullius Cicero)
To: bkopto
Does New York have a gender for his wife to identify as? Or do they need to add a 32nd gender?
To: bkopto
The tree-hugger groom is likely to find his tree bride’s knot hole, is wholly unsatisfying.
Splinter’s aside...
13
posted on
05/24/2016 2:27:42 PM PDT
by
MarchonDC09122009
(When is our next march on DC? When have we had enough?)
To: bkopto
I don’t think this wedding was consensual. The bride seemed rather wooden at the ceremony.
To: Hieronymus
Had the tree given its consent?
And what gender was the tree?
Inquiring minds want to know.
15
posted on
05/24/2016 2:28:51 PM PDT
by
alloysteel
(The Triumph of Trump - finally, does the hegemony of the Republican elites get broken?)
To: bkopto
So throughout the day, the tree gets wood?
16
posted on
05/24/2016 2:35:32 PM PDT
by
A_Former_Democrat
(#BoycottTarget #BoycottRoss Women & children hurt the most)
To: Hieronymus
Just call him a cockeyed octamist.
I figured if Sr. Dendrosexual married a tree, at least he wouldn't be crossing the border any time soon, but it sounds like he's the "love 'em and leave 'em" type.
17
posted on
05/24/2016 2:36:18 PM PDT
by
x
To: bkopto
Did the tree give knowing consent to this union?
I sense that the Ents are about to rise up at this outrage.
To: bkopto
I knew this thread would be funny. Thanks for posting. I married a Buckeye.
19
posted on
05/24/2016 2:42:02 PM PDT
by
neefer
(Because you can't starve us out and you can't make us run.)
To: bkopto
Did the tree say “yes”?????????????
20
posted on
05/24/2016 2:42:21 PM PDT
by
Innovative
("Winning isn't everything, it's the only thing." -- Vince Lombardi)
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