Posted on 03/09/2018 4:08:27 PM PST by Pollster1
Of course there are good reasons to temporarily avoid sex. And how much of a role hormones play in both love and sexual appetite is truly not known by many people. When a person (of either gender) loses their sex drive they assume that is a natural thing. They would be shocked to add to their own hormone production and find that it isn’t all that natural. That not only sexual desire but the ability to actively feel more love for their partner as well as a general feeling of well being and happiness comes. An annoyance with others fades. It is amazing and I’ve felt and seen all of it. People do not understand they could be literally happier in their marriage with just that one change.
I get that the above isn’t known, so people don’t go see a natural endocrinologist to ask about it. They just think they aren’t as into sex or their spouse any more. It’s a shame.
The part I don’t get is when someone like me (with over a decade experience supplementing the various hormones my body wasn’t producing or was overproducing) carefully tells a woman how much of what she has lost is due to a hormone underproducing, THEY ARENT MOTIVATED to try. And they say something to show it isn’t that they fear medical treatment but that they think they have a good reason to deny their spouse based on something he is not doing to their satisfaction. One of them said it’s been years since they xyz. They sleep in the same bed, they go to couples therapy. For what??? It’s like the poor guy’s role is to serve her in some household and emotional capacity but she has zero responsibility to give him the wonders and closeness of sex. That is the part I don’t understand.
I don’t understand it any more than you do, but I think you’re right that for some reason they genuinely don’t want the problem fixed.
After our 2nd child my wife’s libido went to zero. She seemed fine with this and still took care of her wifely duties. And nothing I tried would turn her on. I spent over ten years trying to find an answer. We went to all kind of Drs, and most just said that this was normal with women.
The one thing that kept coming up was hormone therapy. Found a hormone specialist who suggested testosterone therapy, and it worked like a charm. In fact they used a testosterone pellet and it drove her testosterone levels into the 400s. She was chasing me around the house, and we are both in our 40s. After the testosterone left her system she is still interested in sex but more like she was before the children.
The thing I found interesting is my wife actually seemed scared of how horny she was. She asked me if this is what it is like being a man. I said she seemed to be like a man in his teens or early 20s.
Like I said I spent over ten years researching female sexuality and consider myself an ameteur expert on it. No matter what the feminist claim men and women are different when it comes to sex and I think it is mostly due to hormones.
I see where you could reach that conclusion:
Ephesians 5:22-23 Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church . . .
1 Peter 3:1 Wives, in the same way, accept the authority of your husbands
Yes, women should respect and obey their husbands. However, that “should” is not something to be compelled by force, any more than with my all too frequent violations of:
Exodus 20:8-10 Remember the sabbath day, and keep it holy. Six days you shall labor and do all your work. But the seventh day is a sabbath to the Lord your God; you shall not do any work . . .
On the reverse side, we have:
Matthew 22:21 Jesus said “Render to Caesar the things that are Caesar’s; and to God the things that are God’s.”
Our secular laws forbid rape, which includes sex by force or under a threat of force (or chastisement) whether or not the man and woman are married. Jesus commands us to obey our government. That passage from Matthew 22 alone is sufficient to refute your position. Even if you were right under the Bible’s guidance alone, the fact that our laws forbid such an approach would be sufficient to render your position invalid for those who live in the United States, at least in the 21st century.
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