>>A friend who lost a child a few years ago was ranting on FB the other day, saying that she was offended when people tell her how “strong” she is and that she wants to be told that she is “brave” instead.<<
She is neither strong nor brave. She is entitled. No one should have to bury a child but that doesn’t give one a free pass on simple gratitude.
>>She is neither strong nor brave. She is entitled. No one should have to bury a child but that doesn’t give one a free pass on simple gratitude.
I agree, but the point was that people don’t take compassion as an act of simple compassion anymore. They demand the exact compassion that they feel entitled to and if you don’t provide, then you become a cold villain to them.
Of course, if you have an hour or two, you can do it right: start a conversation, let them bring it around to their point of pain, listen actively, do not offer solutions but extend empathy, etc, etc, etc. Some people can do that. But some people fix things. I’m a fixer, so I avoid people who don’t want fixing.