Yeah, dude. I got news for you.
Posted on 07/03/2018 12:17:54 PM PDT by EdnaMode
I’m a 35-year-old man and I’ve always identified as straight. I’ve been married twice and been in many relationships with genetic women but it never worked out. Recently, I’ve discovered my attraction to trans women. I’m not ashamed, but I am nervous for my friends and family to meet my amazing and beautiful transgender partner. How should I break it to them?
I want to commend you for expressing your truth because it takes tremendous courage, particularly while living in a society that has very rigid notions of what masculinity looks and behaves like. In the trans community, we sometimes overlook that the men who are attracted to us must endure a coming out process as well. You’ll be happy to know that you’ve already taken the most challenging step, which is to come to an understanding of your sexuality and embrace it. It sounds like you’re ready to move forward.
Before I continue, I want to note that while you’re probably feeling anxious, your trans partner is likely experiencing some herself. She may be dealing with the usual nerves that come with meeting a partner’s loved ones, coupled with some insecurities regarding how her femininity and womanhood will be perceived. For this reason, I think it’s best to tell your friends and family that she is transgender before you introduce your partner to them. You wouldn’t want to put her in a potentially uncomfortable or dangerous situation that could heighten her gender dysphoria.
When considering your query, I decided to reach out to writer, public speaker and trans activist Tiq Milan for more insight.
“You have to be her first line of defense,” he said in an email. “She is the one that has to be outed to them, so you have an obligation to protect her in awkward situations and intervene if people are disrespectful.”
When you ultimately decide to tell your friends and family, I recommend framing each conversation in a positive light. There’s no need to express your partner’s transness as something that is strange or abnormal. Tell your loved ones you’ve met a wonderful girl who you are very fond of and that she happens to have a different past than most girls because she was assigned male at birth. Let them know that she now identifies as a woman and lives her life accordingly.
Be sure to also sprinkle in some distinctive details about who she is, like her hobbies and aspirations. Paint an accurate and well-rounded picture beyond her trans identity. After all, trans people are multifaceted human beings, full of nuance and depth. We are more than our trans identity.
There is always a chance that certain individuals will not react well to finding out your partner is trans. But in my personal experience, people tend to be much more open and receptive than you may initially think. (It is 2018 after all.) My suggestion is to be open-minded, just like you are hoping your loved ones will be to you. Allow people to surprise you and give them the benefit of the doubt. I think that most of the people who genuinely care about you will just want to see you happy and fulfilled.
Sincerely, Serena
"Cisgender (often abbreviated to simply cis) is a term for people whose gender identity matches the sex that they were assigned at birth. Cisgender may also be defined as those who have "a gender identity or perform a gender role society considers appropriate for one's sex". It is the opposite of the term transgender."
“Hi. I’m a homosexual. Girls scare me.”
Yeah, dude. I got news for you.
You basically tell them, you are a gay man, can’t comes to grips with it, so requires his men have female characteristics....
Or, more likely, you were abused by a man sexually at a young age, and you did not receive proper therapy for your abuse, and now your mind has created this desire for men harkening back to those early exposures to sexual pleasures, but are equally afraid of men because it was also a man who caused you that pain, so you have decided to find a man who somewhat looks like a woman.
Same reason “gay” women date butch women... they were most likely abused by a man in their life, and want a man, but are afraid of them, so they go for a woman who looks like a man.
Lets be honest, if you find women attractive or men attractive you don’t find yourself chasing ones that look like the other gender.
My bet is, sir, that you are a victim of early childhood sexual abuse by a male.
Start by telling everyone that the ‘cisgender’ or ‘transgender’ is an individual having serious psychological identity issues.......
Exactly!
He’s queer and his partner is a dude and they’re both mentally ill perverts
“Cisgender is a term for people whose gender identity matches the sex that they were assigned at birth.”
Whew! Glad I won the gender lottery. I match!!!
Meh. I just ignore it all except for laughs and to see Jordan Peterson and Ben Shapiro own these guys on youtube videos. I’ve known a lot of homosexuals in my travels (I lived in Seattle for 46 years), but I’ve only known one transgender, and I didn’t know he was until he showed up at our five year get-together after a Y2K project.
Everyone was wondering who the ugly middle aged woman in a red dress was sitting in the corner kinda pouting. I found out a week later who it was.:-D
“Man up and tell them that you’re sexually attracted to a man who pretends to be a woman.”
That’s right. Own up to the fact you are dating a chick with a d*ck!
What does it mean, to suddenly realize you’re into beautiful girls with penises? What is that, exactly? Well, I’ve loved women all this time, but something was always missing... ah, I’ve figured it out!
So this is a new gender or orientation. What letter does it start with so we can included it in LGBTQRS etc.? philotrans? Transphil? #2weinersbetterthan1
A fag wants to have sex with a crossdresser, and he wants all his friends and family to tell him it’s okay.
Oh, you won't need to tell them, friend. They'll notice in about 15 seconds.
It wasn’t easy for me, either, but here is the appropriate terminology and meaning:
“Trans-” = Fake
So a transwoman is a fake woman, a guy who either has or has not lopped off the applicable equipment.
Spelled “hot mess”
Invite them over to your house for a bar-b-que party, get them all drunk on their asses then tell them you are a homosexual...There will be laughter galore and mass celebration.
......easy peezie.....
Cisgender with an “attraction to trans women” (in pre-2000s speak) is a dude who thinks he isn’t (and doesn’t want to be) gay but actually likes transvestites.
Sorry, I had to read your post a few times before I realized you had already gotten it.
Your partner is trans-gender?
You’re gay man.
Barking at the moon nut job
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