That’s the conundrum. I don’t want
to see him homeless, in the street.
We (my wife and I), dearly love
our children.
I’m a die hard conservative, and
am extremely proud of my sons’
sacrifice. In cases such as these,
we are all sacrificing. Rules have
not worked, as there is only a slight
indication that he’s drunk or stoned,
and he seems to mellow out somewhat.
Yes, he does live with us, but he
has nowhere else to go if I kick him
out. I want to help him, not abandon
him. I do thank you for your input.
I understand.
I watched my brother die of alcoholism at age 50 because the rest of my family didn’t want to see him homeless and suffering. They literally “loved” him to death. He died 12 years ago...I will never get over it.
I suggest counseling for you and perhaps your wife. This is about getting HIM to get the help he needs, not making you feel better by “helping him not suffer”.
I know that seems harsh. I saw it all up very close and very personal and held my brothers hand as he took his last breath. That was much harsher than anything I’ve said to you here. It did not have to happen and it doesn’t have to happen to your son.
God bless you and your family and your son. I will put you all in my prayers which I greatly believe in. YOU see a counselor, hopefully a tough one.
Often, young folks with these issues need to be firmly told what to do. They are often seeking solutions ( like alcohol/pot you describe) but are doing so w/o wisdom or knowledge. Get him alone, in a quiet time and simply tell him to get his act together. Give him a firm but softly spoken “direct order”.
Seek out counsel for yourselves too. Maybe do that first.
Been there/done that.
My faith in Jesus as my healer and savior and Lord made my life possible. Often we survivors have issues in dealing with the guilt of having survived.