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TWELVE COMMANDMENTS FOR SENIORS!
email from friend | 6/20/2021 | unknown

Posted on 06/20/2021 3:30:52 AM PDT by sodpoodle

TWELVE COMMANDMENTS FOR SENIORS! #1 - Talk to yourself. There are times you need expert advice. #2 - "In Style" are the clothes that still fit. #3 - You don't need anger management. You need people to stop pissing you off. #4 - Your people skills are just fine. It's your tolerance for idiots that needs work. #5 - The biggest lie you tell yourself is, "I don't need to write that down. I'll remember" #6 - "On time" is when you get there. #7 - Even duct tape can't fix stupid - but it sure does muffle the sound. #8 - It would be wonderful if we could put ourselves in the dryer for ten minutes, then come out wrinkle-free and three sizes smaller  #9 - Lately, You've noticed people your age are so much older than you? #10 - Growing old should have taken longer. #11 - Aging has slowed you down, but it hasn't shut you up. #12 - You still haven't learned to act your age, and hope you never will  And one more: "One for the road" means using the bathroom before you leave the house!!


TOPICS: Chit/Chat; Humor
KEYWORDS: 12commandments; cry; laugh; smile
Growing up or growing old?
1 posted on 06/20/2021 3:30:52 AM PDT by sodpoodle
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To: sodpoodle

#1 - Talk to yourself. There are times you need expert advice.
#2 - “In Style” are the clothes that still fit.
#3 - You don’t need anger management. You need people to stop pissing you off.
#4 - Your people skills are just fine. It’s your tolerance for idiots that needs work.
#5 - The biggest lie you tell yourself is, “I don’t need to write that down. I’ll remember”
#6 - “On time” is when you get there.
#7 - Even duct tape can’t fix stupid - but it sure does muffle the sound.
#8 - It would be wonderful if we could put ourselves in the dryer for ten minutes, then come out wrinkle-free and three sizes smaller  #9 - Lately, You’ve noticed people your age are so much older than you?
#10 - Growing old should have taken longer.
#11 - Aging has slowed you down, but it hasn’t shut you up.
#12 - You still haven’t learned to act your age, and hope you never will 
And one more: “One for the road” means using the bathroom before you leave the house!!


2 posted on 06/20/2021 3:32:56 AM PDT by newfreep (“Leftism, under all of its brand names, is a severe, violent & evil mental disorder.”)
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To: sodpoodle

“#11 - Aging has slowed you down, but it hasn’t shut you up.”

THAT’s the truth!


3 posted on 06/20/2021 3:39:08 AM PDT by polymuser (A socialist is a communist without the power to take everything from their citizens...yet.d)
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To: newfreep

Thanks! Much more easily shared now. 😃


4 posted on 06/20/2021 3:40:20 AM PDT by polymuser (A socialist is a communist without the power to take everything from their citizens...yet.d)
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To: newfreep

Thank you. Paragraphs are our friends.


5 posted on 06/20/2021 3:50:47 AM PDT by Bloody Sam Roberts (If Liberals had a conscience, they wouldn't be Liberals.)
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To: sodpoodle

5 is true. But on time? We are the generation that shows up a half hour early everywhere we go. That’s what we learned to do. That’s why employers like us.


6 posted on 06/20/2021 4:46:06 AM PDT by chicagolady (Mexican Elite say: EXPORT Poverty and Let the the Stupid AmericanTaxpayer foot the bill !)
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To: sodpoodle
In case you're not familiar with HTML here is sort of a beginners thread on the subject and was posted here back in 2015 and it is an upgraded version of one posted somewhere here several years prior to this one and it should be easy enough for even the green noobies to understand. It helps to properly format your texts.

Click link here: HTML Sandbox 2015

7 posted on 06/20/2021 4:54:47 AM PDT by Ron H.
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To: chicagolady
5 is true. But on time? We are the generation that shows up a half hour early everywhere we go. That’s what we learned to do. That’s why employers like us.

Amen. For me on the job I'd get there about an hour early. Time to get the days work schedule planned an laid out as I was the boss and it also gave me time get me a pot of coffee and wake up and read my daily newspaper to get me current on what was happening around the world (this was before the advent of the desktop computer) and neighborhood and it gave me opportunities to discuss it with my fellow supervisors and with my supervisor. He liked it when we would stay current on what was going on. Just saying, the early bird always got the worm I was always told.

8 posted on 06/20/2021 5:00:29 AM PDT by Ron H.
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To: polymuser

Aging need not slow down old farts. But daily exercise is needed and without it everything deteriorates especially cognitive dissonance.


9 posted on 06/20/2021 5:06:52 AM PDT by entropy12 (President Trump saved Millions of lives with his warp speed push of vaccines, including my spouse.)
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To: chicagolady

Yes and yes!
Why use a watch if you can’t be on time? In my 37 years working 7:30AM to 5PM I was late to work may be 3 times. It snows in Chicago, a lot!


10 posted on 06/20/2021 5:10:23 AM PDT by entropy12 (President Trump saved Millions of lives with his warp speed push of vaccines, including my spouse.)
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To: chicagolady

Employers like us because we show up at all, not just early.

When my son was in college, about 10 years ago, he had a conversation with a woman who was a manager at a local department store.

She said that anyone who had the work ethic to show up on time and at all, and not just take the day off without notice just because they felt like it, had a great future in the company.

These kids showed up only if they felt like it when they felt like it. No sense of obligation to someone who is depending on you and what you are doing to them when you abdicate your responsibilities.


11 posted on 06/20/2021 5:29:09 AM PDT by metmom (...fixing our eyes on Jesus, the Author and Perfecter of our faith.)
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To: newfreep
#7 - Even duct tape can’t fix stupid - but it sure does muffle the sound.

Preach it, bro!

12 posted on 06/20/2021 5:56:46 AM PDT by Noumenon (The Second Amendment exists primarily to deal with those who just won't take no for an answer. KTF)
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To: newfreep

#13. At my age, I can say want I want and I don’t care what others think about it.
#14. Crime may not pay, but a life sentence is less a deterrent the older you get.

I just celebrated my 80th birthday on June 16. Once I hit sixty, I started taking the two numbers of my age ad adding them together until I got a single digit. That signifies how old I feel. So, now I feel like a nine-year-old. Hint - you can never be older than nine!

Happy Father’s Day to,all,themDads out there.


13 posted on 06/20/2021 5:58:45 AM PDT by NTHockey (My rules of engagement #1: Take no prisoners. And to the NSA trolls, FU)
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To: entropy12

“...especially cognitive dissonance.”

What?


14 posted on 06/20/2021 6:15:30 AM PDT by faucetman (Just the facts, ma'am, Just the facts )
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To: sodpoodle

#13 Lifes to short to gripe about formatting at a political message board & thanks for all your jokes


15 posted on 06/20/2021 6:27:37 AM PDT by Bell Bouy II
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To: faucetman

In the field of psychology, cognitive dissonance is the perception of contradictory information. Relevant items of information include a person’s actions, feelings, ideas, beliefs, and values, and things in the environment.Cognitive dissonance is typically experienced as psychological stress when they participate in an action that goes against one or more of them.


16 posted on 06/20/2021 9:18:06 AM PDT by entropy12 (President Trump saved Millions of lives with his warp speed push of vaccines, including my spouse.)
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