Posted on 08/07/2023 8:37:43 AM PDT by xp38
Birmingham, AL — In an extraordinary display of efficiency and ruthlessness, the FBI's crack tactical team descended upon a sleepy suburban neighborhood after receiving reports of an active incandescent light bulb.
A deafening sound of helicopters filled the air as the FBI's Tactical Light Bulb Unit (TLBU) descended upon the home of Mark Johnson and his family. The elite team, clad in full tactical gear, executed a precision landing on the Johnsons' roof, then rappelled down and smashed their way through every window of the house.
Neighbors watched in bewilderment as Special Agent Lark, leader of the TLBU, commanded his highly trained team to secure the perimeter. "This is a Code Edison! I repeat, a Code Edison! We have an incandescent situation here!" he shouted into his radio. "If met with the slightest resistance shoot first and ask questions later, men. The stakes are too high!"
The team moved with lightning speed, taking positions around the dining table and assessing the situation. After a tense standoff with the active burning bulb, the TLBU deployed Agent Patterson, the most experienced incandescent technician on the bulb squad, to delicately diffuse the volatile, slightly less energy-efficient incandescent bulb. As the nation held its breath, Patterson successfully unscrewed the bulb, triggering a round of applause from neighbors nearby.
At publishing time, Agent Rodriguez had tactically dismantled the chandelier to prevent any future incandescent light bulb situations from ever occurring again.
Who did the reporting?
It was a Republican light bulb.
I hope the dog was in a kennel, or at the vet’s office overnight.
I already volunteered to be the code enforcer on this one! Hahaha?!!?!!
So many side effects from the new bulbs and none on the old.
Today, you’re laughing.
Tomorrow ...
I bought a large stock of 100W lightbulbs, back when I could. There are a couple of spots where I use them because even high quality LED fixtures don’t come on fast enough in cold weather.
Come and take them, Feebs!
If it were true, it would be the first thing that agency had ever unscrewed in its history.
Seth has just made the FBIs “naughty” list and secured himself a billet in a re-education camp under the coming Harris administration....
Could be worse.
Could be a broken fluorescent bulb, and the EPA nuke the site from orbit, just to be sure no one dies from the 0.004 grams (+or -) of mercury that was in it.
Reminds me of the old cartoon with a couple military tanks pointed toward a house.
What happened asks a bystander.
He took the tag off his mattress.
Here’s something to think about:
Every LED bulb is a potential ‘listening device’..................
wearing a MAGA hat jauntily on the side no doubt
LOL!!!
LOL! One FBI guy to hold the bulb and the rest to turn the chair he’s standing on.
This would be even funnier if it weren’t actually possible under this Administration.
How so?
That light bulb is going to be so screwed.
Centennial Bulb in fire station 6
Back in the early 1960s Steve Allen did a skit where he had a mattress on stage and said: “I wonder what would happen if I cut this tag off?!” He cut the tag and two cops rushed out and took him away.
“Today, you’re laughing.”
Agreed. All the madness going on today would have been totally laughable or dismissed as a conspiracy theory a couple decades ago.
Today we are not laughing at much of this, such as and in particular child mutilations and elites trafficking kids.
Back to the original Bee humor: Soon a blue state will implement a total incandescent ban, including those in stock and/or still being used. It will be enforced by snitches, such as neighbors or their own kids, ratting to the local political commissar.
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