Morford: Where's My (Bleeping) Sex?

San Francisco Chronicle ^ | 4/23/04 | Mark Morford

[CAIndependent]

Because what the world really needs now is more uptight little companies from Utah that will help us all block out the random messy naked blood n' guts of the world.

Companies that will, without anyone asking them to, protect us from media evildoers and exposed flesh and scary exploding things and that part in "Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind" wherein the universe is blessed, for the briefest of moments, with the joy of Kate Winslet's radiant nipples.

This is what is happening. This is the happy godlike agenda of Utah's ClearPlay, a twee and shrill little corporation that has taken it upon itself to sit around the cube farm all day and watch countless Hollywood flicks and zap out any and all icky violent suggestive material in, say, "Lost In Translation." For your protection. How kind...

[Loyalist]

Morford: Where's My (Bleeping) Sex?

Everywhere it shouldn't be.

[cardinal4]

Must be that time of the month for Ms. Morford..

[smith288]

Anything Mark authors smells like my cats litter box.
Never should his articles be thought of seriously and I have no clue why they make it to FR besides mocking the little girl.

[cyborg]

Morford nice picture in the New York Post today. That little skirt makes your thighs look so thin.

[dirtboy]

Companies that will, without anyone asking them to, protect us from media evildoers and exposed flesh and scary exploding things

What an idiot. If no one wants this service, no one will buy it, and the original DVDs are out there if Moffie doesn't get enough titillation in the Tenderloin. But our little tailpipe commie seems to think that any activity should be sanctioned by the government before it can be allowed to happen (except for her activity, of course).

[kissmyconservativebutt]

I am so glad I am a simple man. It helps me to not understand a damn thing that the idiot just spewed in perfect, yet slightly complex, English structures.

[stuartcr]

WWJSLA?

[jimbo123]

More AIDS dementia from the whacko from SF.

[KarlInOhio]

with the joy of Kate Winslet's radiant nipples

For some reason, I don't think that Morford gets any joy from seeing those radiant nipples.

I want a copy of the SF Chronicle with all the disturbing and annoying parts removed. Wait, I can just stop by Office Depot and pick those up by the ream er, uh, case.

(ick, I used "ream" in the same post as "Morford". I'm sorry)

[RightWingAtheist]

Morford sounds off!

[dirtboy]

For some reason, I don't think that Morford gets any joy from seeing those radiant nipples.

Au contrare. He wistfully wishes they were his...

[daviddennis]

You know, he actually has some pretty good points about personal responsibility. Abdicating personal responsibility to a machine, so you can watch movies with "naughty bits" with your kid, without actually getting to see the "naughty bits" to protect her/him, is a pretty perverse concept if you think about it.

On the other hand, nobody's putting a gun to people's heads and forcing them to buy this thing, so I don't see why he's so upset.

He, well, won't buy it.

I think most of us believe in taking responsibility ourselves instead of having a gadget do it for us. So I doubt most of us would buy it either.

Right and left united in one big happy family.

Maybe the sunshine and butterflies will come next :-).

D

[claudiustg]

--- the joy of Kate Winslet's radiant nipples---

Perhaps some small illustration would be in order. I'm getting an incomplete mental image that could use some fleshing out, yes?

[T Minus Four]

I had to go look up "twee". It's a chiefly British adjective meaning "overly precious or nice". Must be a homosexual buzz word.

[T Minus Four]

I had to go look up "twee". It's a chiefly British adjective meaning "overly precious or nice". Must be a homosexual buzz word.

[SkyPilot]

I once met a guy who all of you would like. He was kind, considerate, great husband, and father.

He said (by his own admission) that he used to like Morford. He said he hated himself, his life, and others with unfathomable poison.

Here is a site that Mark should read: http://www.seekgod.org

Mark--you don't have to lost. You can be found.

[The kings dead]

nobody's putting a gun to people's heads and forcing them to buy this thing, so I don't see why he's so upset.

Maybe he thinks Americans need to watch more sex and violence. Perhaps next week he'll be calling for subsidies for sex and violence.

[RichInOC]

Mark, it's a free country. If you don't like the stupid players, don't buy one.

[Cincinatus]

Try this