Posted on 10/04/2004 7:48:04 PM PDT by dukeman
Study his voice, mannerisms and see if you can do a satire of some of his most absurd statements in response. You might get a laugh from Republicans, offend Demos and confuse everybody else. Maybe you could even make a little $$$$ on the side.
I live for that. I truly envy you if you can pull it off...
If/when you get the ability to post a photo, just post one of Kerry. If you look that much like him nobody will doubt it's you! Or you can email your photo to someone on this thread who can post it.
"...what do I do about, or with, this unfortunate accident of birth?"
Hie thee to LA, for I hear they are casting a commercial there! Check the threads. It's non-union!
And if you really look a lot like him and (heaven forfend!) he wins, you might have a lucrative 4 years ahead of you.
Cut your hair.
You must have really good hair.
Buy stock in ketchup.
Ha! I was also thinking of saying something like, "Yeah, I'm actually Kerry's illegitimate love-child from a torrid affair when he was only 15-years old." I'm 45.
Go on the Elizabeth Edwards diet, pack on a quick 50 pounds, and your troubles will be over. Well, at least your Kerryesque troubles.
Just THINK of the possibilities!
I'm still laughing. Poor dukeman.
a fate worse than death
He could hire himself out as a double and make some money off it. Show up at GO parties, etc.
My DEEPEST Sympathy:( EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW....feel sorry for your wife too:)) JUST KIDDING:) Most of Kerry's problem is what is on the inside.
Make sure you tell everyone that while the REAL John Kerry's a masterdebater, you are proudly a master of your domain.
man that has got to suck..........LMAO
Start calling your wife Tu-Reh-Za and she might leave you alone. Or just leave you. Hmmm... Bad idea...
"You Rang?", dukeman?
Might want to talk to some good plastic surgeons (all Republicans of course!) in your area!
;)
Do you have good hair? Do you use tan in a can? Can we call you pumpkin head? Do you wear flip flops? All these things are truly important if you want to be John Kerry. Also you have to learn how to shoot spitballs!
Send your picture to me!!!!I'm dying to see if you are a Kerry look alike, and I'll post it for you! Send to:
mailman@basscartoons.com.
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