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For an orchestra musician, it's a life of few full rests
Minneapolis Star Tribune ^
| December 5, 2004
| Michael Adams
Posted on 12/05/2004 5:46:36 AM PST by rhema
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1
posted on
12/05/2004 5:46:36 AM PST
by
rhema
To: rhema
rehearsals are 2½ hours long and nobody is late.Except Bill Clinton and his sax.
2
posted on
12/05/2004 5:49:22 AM PST
by
beyond the sea
(I know beyond a doubt ...... my heart will lead me there)
To: rhema
- What's the difference between a violin and a viola?
-
- The viola burns longer.
- The viola holds more beer.
- You can tune the violin.
3
posted on
12/05/2004 5:50:02 AM PST
by
billorites
(freepo ergo sum)
To: rhema
- What's the difference between a viola and a coffin?
- The coffin has the dead person on the inside.
4
posted on
12/05/2004 5:50:41 AM PST
by
billorites
(freepo ergo sum)
To: beyond the sea
But seriously, thanks to all of these good people in orchestras who are among the lessening number of groups of people in our country who really do something very well.
Congrats!
5
posted on
12/05/2004 5:52:03 AM PST
by
beyond the sea
(I know beyond a doubt ...... my heart will lead me there)
To: rhema
- Why is playing the viola like peeing in your pants?
- They both give you a nice warm feeling without making any sound.
6
posted on
12/05/2004 5:52:14 AM PST
by
billorites
(freepo ergo sum)
To: rhema
7
posted on
12/05/2004 5:53:10 AM PST
by
billorites
(freepo ergo sum)
To: billorites
What's the difference between a viola and an onion?
No one cries when you cut up a viola.
8
posted on
12/05/2004 5:53:33 AM PST
by
beyond the sea
(I know beyond a doubt ...... my heart will lead me there)
To: everyone
For all the Michigan Freepers, The Kentwood Community Band, which is made up of volunteers from all walks of life, and of which I am a member of, will be presenting their Christmas Concert next week Sunday, December 12, 2004 at 2:30pm Eastern, at the Forest Hills Northern High School Auditorium. FHN High School is on Leonard St, just east of M-44 (East Beltline Ave)
9
posted on
12/05/2004 5:54:09 AM PST
by
Eric Roelfsema
(Congrats to the NBA Champion Detroit Pistons)
To: billorites
ROFL ........ there goes the coffee!
10
posted on
12/05/2004 5:54:38 AM PST
by
beyond the sea
(I know beyond a doubt ...... my heart will lead me there)
To: rhema
- How do you get a dozen violists to play in tune?
Shoot 11 of them.
11
posted on
12/05/2004 5:55:55 AM PST
by
billorites
(freepo ergo sum)
To: rhema
I gotta ask...How much do taxpayers subsidize the orchestra?
12
posted on
12/05/2004 5:56:31 AM PST
by
Drango
(Those who advocate robbing (taxing) Peter to pay Paul...will always have the support of Paul.)
To: billorites
Why do so many people take an instant dislike to Viola players?
Why wait; It saves so much time.
****
What do you call someone who hangs around musicians a lot? A Viola player.
****
What do you call a Viola player with half a brain? Gifted.
*****
Why are Violist's ears sought after for transplants? They've never been used.
*****
What do a SCUD missile and a Viola player have in common? They're both offensive and inaccurate.
13
posted on
12/05/2004 5:57:01 AM PST
by
beyond the sea
(I know beyond a doubt ...... my heart will lead me there)
To: rhema
I admire their talent, but it's been my experience that most serious musicians are weirdos.
14
posted on
12/05/2004 5:57:22 AM PST
by
Jaysun
(Trees are a renewable resource you idiots.)
To: beyond the sea
A 'cellist and three violists walked into a restaurant. Presently a waiter came over to serve them.
"Good Evening, sir," he said to the 'cellist. "And what would like tonight?"
"I'd like a rump steak, medium rare," replied the 'cellist.
"Would you like anything with that?"
"What do you have?"
"Salad?" suggested the waiter.
"No, thank you," said the cellist.
"Potatoes?"
"Ah, no."
"Vegetables?"
"Oh, they'll have what I'm having."
15
posted on
12/05/2004 5:57:25 AM PST
by
billorites
(freepo ergo sum)
To: billorites
"Vegetables?"................. "Oh, they'll have what I'm having."STOP........ I'm going to have to brew another pot at this rate!
p.s. There really is alot of humor surrounding these folks, isn't there?
16
posted on
12/05/2004 6:03:28 AM PST
by
beyond the sea
(I know beyond a doubt ...... my heart will lead me there)
To: rhema
"At exactly 10 a.m. the orchestra tunes and the rehearsal starts. Precisely 2½ hours later, the orchestra stops."
Doesn't leave much time for the "band meetings" in the back of the van over a hash pipe, does it?
17
posted on
12/05/2004 6:13:56 AM PST
by
NRA1995
(Yew jes' go and lay yore hand on a Pittsburgh Steeler fan and I think yer gonna fin'lly understand)
To: NRA1995
Ah, memories of the band bus! No funny cigs for us, but oh the memories! I was telling the kiddies band bus stories just yesterday but some stories I, smilingly, kept to myself.
To: billorites; rhema; beyond the sea; Charles Henrickson; mikrofon
"Hey, who was that violist I saw you with last night?"
"That was no violist -- that was my fife!"
(OK, some things don't translate well)
To: NRA1995
The reason for the rigid rehearsal time is because being in an orchestra is a UNION gig. There is a union rep that sits (and usually sleeps or reads the paper) through the whole rehearsal, and walks over to the conductor and points at his wristwatch if the rehearsal goes one second late.
And, "band meetings over a hash pipe" are more common with rock bands, not orchestras.
20
posted on
12/05/2004 6:33:54 AM PST
by
jdsteel
(in financial services for over 20 yrs)
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