Save the Sharks : James Dobson, Ted Kennedy and Ann Coulter

RealClearPolitics.com ^ | 06/11/2006 | Kathleen Parker

[SirLinksalot]

June 11, 2006

Save the Sharks By Kathleen Parker

The poor shark can get no rest these days. Everyone is jumping him.

For those whose shark metaphors stalled on "Jaws," "jumping the shark" refers to the moment when something, usually a dramatic production, runs - or strays from - its course. Coined by Jon Hein (jumptheshark.com), the phrase evolved from the episode of "Happy Days" where the show's writers, apparently out of ideas, had Fonzie literally jump a shark while water skiing.

It was so over-the-top that the show was deemed dead by those who monitor such things. People are said to jump the shark when, desperate for ratings or attention, they make over-the-top statements.

Of late, we seem to have armies of shark-jumpers, from Dr. James Dobson to Sen. Ted Kennedy to Ann Coulter to my hands-down fave, Sen. James Inhofe - all of whom have taken their own mantras a trope too far. Through them, hyperbole and hysteria have formed an uncivil union, casting national debate into a miasma of self-mockery.

Let me put it this way: Dobson and Inhofe, who seem to think that the devil made gay people, make me want to marry a lesbian transsexual; Coulter, who has attacked a group of 9/11 widows to make a political point, makes me want to wash Cindy Sheehan's feet and hug a war protester; while Kennedy, who has been baying "bigot" about anyone objecting to same-sex marriage on even rational grounds, makes one yearn for the comforting sound of a car alarm.

No wonder Americans can't stand politicians, or that our nation has become a quagmire of insult and ad hominem. Here's a sampling of what has passed for debate in recent days.

Commenting on the proposed constitutional amendment to declare marriage a union only between a man and a woman, Dobson said during a recent chapel service (later broadcast on radio) that "marriage is under vicious attack ... from the forces of hell itself."

Same-sex marriage has plenty of intelligent, knowledgeable supporters and critics, from clergy to laymen to legal scholars. However this issue gets resolved, whether as a federal or state issue, the process can't be helped by implications that gays (our friends, family and neighbors) are evil for wanting to marry.

Meanwhile, if Satan's crib is what stimulates the Republican base, Democrats may enjoy an embarrassment of riches come November as rational conservatives seek saner company.

Giving you-know-who his due, perhaps Dobson was just joshin'. And perhaps Sen. James Inhofe, R-Okla., was just braggin' during the marriage amendment debate when, in a memorable show-'n'-tell, he displayed a poster-sized photo of his extended family and said:

"As you see here, and I think this is maybe the most important prop we'll have during the entire debate, my wife and I have been married 47 years. We have 20 kids and grandkids. I'm really proud to say that in the recorded history of our family, we've never had a divorce or any kind of homosexual relationship."

Quite likely, the operative words here are "recorded history." I'm pretty sure our family Bible doesn't reflect the sexual orientation of our gay cousins, either, but just the same, Inhofe might consider dusting off the family rabbit's foot and padlocking the closets.

Kennedy, whose self-caricature is helping put political cartoonists out of business, has declared that all opponents to same-sex marriage are bigots. Right. And all opponents of state-mandated seat belts are child abusers. And anyone who disagrees with me is a moron. Next.

Finally, Coulter may have jumped the shark with her unfortunate tirade against the 9/11 widows in her new book, "Godless." Which is too bad because Coulter had a point that got lost amid the inevitable outrage.

Her point was that debate becomes strained to impossible when one of the gladiators on the other side has recently suffered a grievous loss. No one wants to challenge a wife whose husband has been killed - or a mother whose son has perished in battle - even if they have become public political players.

The opposition will always look like insensitive bullies, as does Coulter, who undermined her own message more than her critics could. Calling the widows "witches" and saying they were enjoying their husbands' deaths was chum to the other side.

Rabble-rousing, fear-mongering and race-baiting may keep local constituents happy, but none of it gets us where we need to go - toward sane remedies for a united nation. And, yes, happier days.

In shark-free waters.

For the children.

While staying the course.

Because we love freedom, and they don't.

Glub, glub, glub.

kparker@orlandosentinel.com

[SAJ]

Kennedy jumped the shark? If he'd driven off a different bridge, he probably would've hit the bloody shark.

[HIDEK6]

Same-sex marriage has plenty of intelligent, knowledgeable supporters

However, they're queers whose thinking has been taken over by the little head.

[IronJack]

Coulter, Kennedy, and Dobson ... are carbon based life forms.

Coulter and Dobson, yes. There is some doubt about Kennedy. Medical records leaked from studies of Kennedy indicate that his blood has been so diluted by Scotch and single-malt whiskey that hemoglobin is no longer the oxygen-binding factor. He has in essence mutated into a life-form that transports oxygen through some unidentified chemical derivative of ethyl alcohol.

Or at least that's what the experts speculate.

[Tirian]

Hear,hear! Well said!

[Dante3]

I agree with you. This writer is clueless, perhaps a hermit.

[JockoManning]

Read later marker.

[moonman]

Kathleen Parker is synicated and I read her editorials whenever I get a chance. Usually she is humorous and leaning 'right-of-center' on most issues. Maybe she isn't being given a fair shake on this, so, it may make her feel like Ann Coulter.

[N. Theknow]

Democrats may enjoy an embarrassment of riches come November as rational conservatives seek saner company.

This line alone indicates a severe case of terminal dumbassery.

[outlawcam]

All these people who are hiding behind the illusion of respectability while claiming that Coulter has "a point" are really getting hard to stomach. The fact of the matter is, the point would not even be heard if she did not say it in the way that she did. Opening the door to the shed light on the problem wasn't enough. The problem is so pervasive that the door needed to be kicked down.

Coulter did that quite well.

[Mr. Brightside]

I don't see how "Dobson jumped the shark."

Parker thinks marriage is NOT under attack?

[Vanders9]

But thats the point the author is making. Both sides are doing this kind of thing, and it does nothing but bring both sides into disrepute. If in defeating liberalism you resort to the same disgusting tactics they use, aren't you becoming the very thing you despise?

Perhaps Dobson should contemplate "What does it profit a man, if he gains the whole world but loses his soul?"

[John Lenin]

"They voted on one article of impeachment already. And I come back from Africa to stained dresses and cigars and this and impeachment. I am thinking to myself, in other countries they are laughing at us 24 hours a day and I’m thinking to myself, if we were in other countries, we would all right now, all of us together, [starts to shout] all of us together would go down to Washington and we would stone Henry Hyde to death! We would stone him to death! [crowd cheers] Wait! Shut up! Shut up! No shut up! I’m not finished. We would stone Henry Hyde to death and we would go to their homes and we’d kill their wives and their children. We would kill their families. [stands up, yelling] What is happening in this country? What is happening? UGHHH!"

[MNJohnnie]

Isn't it amazing from accusing Marines of War Crimes to accusing Bush of "Spying or "Lying" the Hate Left says the most despicable, hate filled things for years about the Right and NO one raises a peep, Conservatives start FIRING BACK an out pop all sort of psuedo Conservatives to rant and rave at the people on the right for "Jumping the Shark". Tell you want K Parker. When you express 1/2 the angst at YOUR Leftist buddies for their daily parade of hate speech you spew in this column, we will take you seriously. Until then, spare us the rabid hypocrisy.

[mississippi red-neck]

Well said. MRN.

[TalBlack]

"..... our nation has become a quagmire of insult and ad hominem. Here's a sampling of what has passed for debate in recent days. "

The ONLY time this is written is when some right-winger has fired off a telling shot.

[massfreeper]

I think it's obvious whether she is coming from the left or right when she says, "Democrats may enjoy an embarrassment of riches come November as rational conservatives seek saner company." Not to mention that while the basic premise of her article seems rational enough, the fact that the only example of the left "jumping the shark" she can come up with is Teddy Kennedy says a lot about her political leanings as well. What about Ward Churchill, Al Franken, or Michael Moore? But she chooses to focus on Coulter and Dobson... 'nuff said!

[soccermom]

But Ann Coulter didn't "attack 9/11 widows". She pointed out that four(4) 9/11 women were using their newly found wealth and popularity to make controversial political statements, immune from criticism by their status as widows. Actually, she did "attack 9/11 widows" -- not all of them but the "Jersey Girls". Calling them "harpies", speculating that their husbands would have divorced them, making comments about Playboy and suggesting that the women were enjoying their husbands' deaths are all personal attacks. Coulter had an excellent argument -- that these women cannot use the "victim card" to escape rebuttals to their charges. Unfortunately, that argument is lost amidst the personal attacks and that is Parker's point. Ironically, Coulter has bolstered the "victim immunity" status of these women. That wouldn't have been the case if she had simply argued her point without the attacks.

[cinnathepoet]

I agree. For too long, conservatives were just too nice. They would apologize, back up, hem and haw, not wanting to appear "confrontational." Every time they did, liberals would shove themselves forward and take more ground. Well, Ann is doing what liberals say they love all the time: pushing the envelope. She uses their bully tactics and they all scream -- as Ann would say, "like girls." It's time to get a little more aggressive and MAKE the libs show how things like dismembering babies and sodomy are "mainstream" and traditional marriage and owning guns are "extreme."

[Guenevere]

I use to think that too...

..use to think the same thing about Charlie Reece a loooooooong time ago, as well.

People can flip moonman.

Looks like Kathleen is the one who jumped the shark :^

[Guenevere]

You're associating James Dobson with liberal 'disgusting tactics'?...and then you quote about losing his soul to gain the world.....

Unbelievable!...

You really don't know the man, do you.....guess you buy what the MSM want you to believe.