I Identify as Barack Obama

americanthinker.com ^ | Selwyn Duke

[RoosterRedux]

It’s always hard coming out. But it’s even harder not being true to yourself. So, inspired by Bruce Jenner and other intrepid souls, I’ve decided to finally start living the life I was meant to:

I identify as Barack Obama.

Oh, I can hear the cynical statements now. “Duke, your I.Q. is 50 points too high.” “Duke, you can speak fluently without a Teleprompter.” “Duke, you know there aren’t 60 states and can pronounce “corpsman.” “Duke, you’re melanin compromised.” All these things are inconsequential details, the stuff of tiresome prigs -- sort of like genitalia on a man.

Given my identity, compassion dictates I be allowed to use the bathroom of my choice. My preferred bathroom happens to be in the White House. The same is true of my preferred bedroom, kitchen, living room, Blue Room, Green Room and Map Room; and my preferred chef, servants and security detail. I’ll have my preferred executive orders, too.

Some backward thinkers will insist I use the facilities appropriate to my station; others, thinking themselves reasonable, will offer to paint my place white and erect four majestic columns at its entrance. To them I will say, you’re insensitive, bigoted, narrow-minded, unscientific, ambition-phobic racists who should be killed with fire. As with the children and youths for whom the Obama administration (my administration) has so courageously taken up the cudgels, it is unconscionable to suggest I shouldn’t be allowed to use the facilities consistent with my identity.

[1Old Pro]

I identify as Barack Obama.

Now you can go use the WH toilets, or so says Loretta Lynch.

[ResponseAbility]

***I self identify as a sea urchin***

Urchin, urchin, urchin, urchin...emergency. So urchin.

[Albion Wilde]

bump