Posted on 04/05/2002 5:36:23 AM PST by Phantom Lord
With many states facing budget "shortfalls" as the left likes to call them liberal politicians are calling for increases in sales taxes, income taxes, and taxing specific items such as cigarettes, soda, fatty food, bullets, etc...
Well, taking a tip from WPTF talk show host Jerry Agar (Raleigh NC) from a show he did last year I have decided to put the challenge to my fellow FReepers.
What are popular and high use items among liberals that taxes could be placed on to help eliminate these budget "shortfalls"? Liberals are all for raising taxes so surely they would like to see our ideas put into practice. So what "liberal" consumer goods could be taxed a little extra to help states with their budgets?
There should be a tax on "No Smoking" signs, caffeine free coffee and a tax on Nutrasweet and a double tax bought on everything bought at a health food store.
Any gifts to Greenpeace, PETA and any other eco-freak organization should be taxed to the payee at 75 percent of the donation as these organizations cost the public untold costs in rectifying their terrorist actions.
Any money given to NOW and Emily's List should be taxed at 100 percent. We must level the playing field and this would be a good start.
All liberal college professors should have their income taxed at 90 percent because we know they're not worth 10 percent of what they're paid and the damage they do to the children has to be undone, usually causing great expense to the public coffers. Deprogramming is very expensive.
Since public school teachers have been educated at public expense beyond their intelligence, we should take at least 75 percent of their salary (all sensitive Freeper schoolteachers..... this is a JOKE).
There should be a $1,000 extra tax per year for everyone who DOES NOT have a gun in their home because we have to provide extra protection for those sissies.
The UN should be charged property taxes at least three times what private enterprise pays in New York City because they use a disproportionate proportion of city resources and they need to pay their fair share.
All UN ambassadors should pay a $10,000 entry fee into the United States for each time they arrive in this country but not less than $10,000 per year.
Bicycles should be taxed for anybody over 20 because they pay NOTHING to keep up the highways and it's not fair. Children shouldn't be taxed on their bicycles. We're doing this FOR THE CHILDREN.
I do know some very fiscal and social conservatives who use a little pot on the weekends, one who does nearly every night. So yes, I do know several.
Two words... Bummer, dude. We of the Libertarian Party are drafting a response to this incidious proposal of yours. It is a progressive tax since mostly it is the well-off who can afford to waste their money on bongs and buds. We don't want to discourage success, so our counter proposal is to place a heavy tax on check-cashing services and upon the parents of any children who do not work in the coal mines.
1) Homosexuals. They engage in risky sexual behaior that results in a much higher rate of AIDS than the general populace. If smokers should compensate the state for medical services caused by their risky behavior then the same could be said for homos.
2) Tattoos/body-piercings. With Pamela Anderson admitting recently that she contracted hepatitis-C by sharing a tattoo needle with her husband, the public is becoming aware of the dangers of piercing the skin. The medical community is said to be gearing up for a 20% rise in hep-C caused by the latest tattoo/body-piercing craze. Hep-C is similar to AIDS in that it's incurable and eventually kills the host within 10-20 years. Again, if smokers should pay society for their risky behavior, so should those with tattoos and body-piercings.
1. Studies have shown that retching while driving is hazardous. Okay, I can't site any studies, but we can all agree that drivers should be focused on the road. It's also true that bumper stickers that say things like "visualize world peace" and "it will be a great day when the schools have all the money they need and the Pentagon needs to hold a bake sale to buy a bomber" cause a certain number of drivers to retch. Therefore, these bumper stickers should be subjected to a 100 percent tax.
This tax will only apply to bumper stickers with extremist slogans. Bumper stickers that represent the mainstream (as I define it), such as "If they want my gun, they'll have to pry it from my cold dead fingers." will not be taxed.
2. Studies have shown that happier people live longer. By making people unhapppy, we are therefore burdening the nation's medical system. We need to collect taxes to pay for the additional cost.
When people wear clothing and adornments that serves no purpose other than to make themselves look ugly, it make passersby unhappy. We therefore need a 100 percent tax those who make ugly clothing. Makers of "hip urban clothing", beware. The tax rises to 200 percent for people who give piercings anywhere but on the ears.
3. Greenpeace solicitors cause damage to the lawns they walk across, thereby wrecking our environment. They should pay a tax for each house they visit. In addition, to comply with the "Fairness Doctrine" they should bring someone with the opposite opinion to explain to each household why Greenpeace is at best worthless and at worst harmful.
Here's the discredited liberal ideal embraced by Democrats and libertarians:
"Allow me to be irresponsible, and I'll allow you all to pay for the consequences of my irresponsibility."
While I do not agree that this is a "juvenile" thread, I will propose a suggestion for addressing budgetary shortfalls.
It is pretty much the same one I use when I find myself in a shortfall in my personal budget.
I cut spending.
I look first for those things that are essential (like food, utlitities, and housing).
I cut back on those things that are not essential (like entertainment, travel, etc.)
It is sometimes "painful" for me to give up what I like to do. But, when money is short, that's what I must do.
It seems to me that there are too few politicians with the courage to do what I do in my personal budget.
As an example, here in Virginia, we are told that taxes must be raised because of a budget "shortfall".
And yet, the Warner administration has found $27 million -- $27 million!! -- to spend on educating our youth to the dnagers of smoking tobacco.
My solution: CUT SPENDING!
Let's face it youse guys just aren't pulling your weight.
You will find that not everyone here shares your views about the Bush administration "pissing away" a budget surplus.
Some of really do believe that the War on Terrorism is necessary -- and that it really does cost money to wage such a war.
Now, be a good little liberal and go get your latest talking points from the DNC.
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