I’m a good man. A nice man. Told very handsome.
BUT OVER & OVER I hear: Why are you so nice to me?
THEN, they essentially sabotage the good relationship, and then settle down with a bad guy.
One gal actually went back to a guy who used to beat & rape her. A lot.
I seriously don’t know what to do anymore & time keeps ticking.
:(
Don’t know what to tell you, other than you need to thank G-d you were spared a marriage with a woman like that.
Finding a woman who is a woman is as hard as it is to find a man who is a man.
Given my wife and I had an all-but-arranged marriage, I am of zero help in that regard.
I can only assume you are looking in the wrong places or are attracted to women based on criteria other than their character and wisdom.
Even though I’m middle aged and don’t have many young single friends, I can think of several young Christian women who appreciate nice guys, even more who have recently married nice, Christian young men.
They are out there, probably not in bars or the gym, but they are there. I met my husband while volunteering, a young couple we know met at a Christian young adults fellowship group. She’s absolutely beautiful inside and out and her groom is a great guy. He would die to protect a woman, never would hurt one.
Oh and nice doesn’t equal submissive and weak. Kind loving men can still be a leader and able to protect.
I don’t get it. There are a million good women out there looking for a solid, kind, loving guy.
I would have to guess you are looking in the wrong talent pool, or there is something about you—dress, focus, communication, who knows—that is warding them off.
You ought to ask one or more from the past, see what they have to say.
The only advice I would give is to look to a woman’s family, her background. If the family is strong and loving and welcoming, (and God-fearing), you are likely in the presence of a good wife-to-be.
If there is divorce and trouble and addiction and so on—you will encounter same.
A man’s relationship with his wife will often mirror his relationship with his mother. A woman who loves or hates her father will likely be similarly disposed to her husband.
Just my observations.
Ever hear of “No More Mr. Nice Guy”?
Think of it from the perspective of evolutionary psychology. A "nice" man might not be sufficiently aggressive to protect his mate and children. Women do not respect a man who is too "nice", who they can walk all over. If he will not stand up to her, then he might not stand up to the world.
Also, women hate being bored. The bad guy may scare her, he may upset her, but he will not bore her.
CHANGE BARS, GROCERY STORES, COFFEE SHOPS. DO DIFFERENT
Did you ever think that you might be seeking the wrong kind of woman? Take a few minutes and make a list of what you really believe in important to you in a woman. Then think back about your previous choices and how they measure up to your list.
Consider the time you have left on this wonderful world. Do something different.
Best wishes, dear. I know how it is and I sympathize.
I’m a good man. A nice man. Told very handsome.