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The Bible says that while connected as one Body, we are all different parts of the Body of Christ -- so what body part are you? Take the Babylon Bee's quiz to find out!

Lady Godiva and her hubby, Leofric, the Earl Of Mercia were both generous to Christian religious houses. He established a Benedictine monastery in Coventry. She gave gold and silver jewelry to monasteries. One necklace was hung on the neck of the Virgin Mary. The first known Rosary-like string of prayer beads was made by her. That's history. Different times. According to legend, LG was deeply troubled by oppressive taxation of the people by her husband and entreated him again and again to lower taxes but he refused. However she persisted and eventually he gave in on the condition that she...

Poet Emma Lazarus was born on July 22nd, 1849 in New York City. She is most famous for the words: “Give me your tired, your poor,/ Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free,/ The wretched refuse of your teeming shore. Send these, the homeless, tempest-tost to me ....." She also had some great thoughts about the dangers of anti patriotic crap: "“Let our first care today be the re-establishment of our physical strength, the reconstruction of our national organism, so that in future, where the respect due to us cannot be won by entreaty, it may be commanded, and where...

FT MYERS, FL — In a desperate attempt to get help for its citizens and deal with the growing humanitarian crisis in the area, a Florida town devastated by Hurricane Ian has taken the unusual step of raising the Ukrainian flag, hoping to convince Congress to send aid. "The Ukrainian government flies this flag, and they're just swimming in billions and billions of dollars in support from the United States. We're just swimming in sewage," said Ray Valdivia, the Response Coordinator working to assess the damage in the town. "We tried going through the normal channels to get help from...

Vice President Kamala Harris' model stepdaughter Ella Emhoff bared her boobs while walking the runway at a New York Fashion Week show Saturday. Emhoff, who is the daughter of US second gentleman Doug Emhoff and first wife, Kerstin Emhoff, wore a barely-there mint blouse and a black leather lambskin miniskirt with black gloves for the outing. The outfit appeared to be a deliberate choice, and there's no suggestion the bared boobs were a wardrobe malfunction. The designer told The Associated Press he discovered an industrial space in the former home of the Japanese consulate while on a bike ride on...

Someone had to do it

The CDC has issued bizarre guidance telling Americans infected with monkeypox to have sex by masturbating at least six feet away from their partner, among other recommendations. Guidance from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) says anyone who has the disease must not have sex.

According to local media reports, the Taliban have murdered more than 40 civilians in Malistan in the past one week. Most of these civilians were Hazaras.

HOUSTON, TX—Texans are struggling to keep warm amid a cold snap that has brought arctic temperatures to the region. Left with no other options, many Texans are being forced to cut open cattle with lightsabers and crawl inside to stay warm. One rancher and his ranch hand were forced to take these drastic measures when temperatures approached the level of springtime in Ohio and his horse froze before he reached the first marker. “This steer really smells bad, kid,” said the rancher to his shivering ranch hand. He then cut open the cow’s carcass and encouraged his employee to crawl...

Three military pilots died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the pearly gates. Saint Peter said, 'In honor of this holy season, you must each possess something that symbolizes Christmas to get into heaven.' The Navy pilot thumbed through his pockets and pulled out a lighter. He flicked it on. 'It's a candle,’ he said. Saint Peter said, 'It did make light; you may pass through the pearly gates.' The Air Force pilot reached into his pocket and pulled out a set of keys. He shook them and said, 'They're bells.' Saint Peter said, 'They had...

Left-wing documentary director and Joe Biden supporter Michael Moore took to Twitter on Friday to proclaim that his “thoughts and prayers are with Covid-19” following President Donald Trump having tested positive for the coronavirus. “That poor virus got sucked into his body and is now trapped there. How can it escape?” tweeted Moore on Friday. “He wants to use it as a prop. ‘See this China Flu? I BEAT IT! Just like I’ll beat Biden! They’re both a hoax!’ My thoughts and prayers, too, are with Covid-19.”

A bar on Long Island is in hot water after it reportedly took bets on shooting deaths in New York City and Chicago. The Cliffton on East Main Street in Patchogue created a gambling pool on which city would see the most shooting deaths over the Labor Day holiday weekend, with the winner offered a cash prize, according to Newsday. “Let the shooting sprees begin!” the bar reportedly posted to Instagram last week along with a photo of a Super Bowl-style betting box. Officials have since expressed outrage over the gambling pool. …

Any place to buy a ticket on the life span of this one

President Barack Obama likes to say the White House is the “people’s house.” Now, the people are getting a look at the rooms where he lives. Exclusive photos published Tuesday by Architectural Digest are giving the public its first glimpse of private areas on the second floor of the White House that Obama, his wife, Michelle, daughters Malia and Sasha and family dogs Bo and Sunny have called home for nearly eight years. Los Angeles-based interior designer Michael Smith decorated the rooms, as well as the Oval Office. A mutual friend in Chicago introduced him to the Obamas after the...

HAITI-JUDGING, GOD'S JUDGMENTS & CHRISTIAN LOVE And yet, we have no right to claim that we know why a disaster like the earthquake in Haiti happened at just that place and at just that moment That depends. This exhortation from Scripture should give all of us pause about glib, surface, carnal, fleshy judgments of others: Luke 19:22 (Amplified Bible) 22He said to the servant, I will judge and condemn you out of your own mouth, you wicked slave! You knew [did you] that I was a stern (hard, severe) man, picking up what I did not lay down, and reaping...

LUBBOCK, Texas -- Texas Tech has banned the sale of a T-shirt bearing the likeness of Michael Vick hanging the dog mascot of rival Texas A&M. The red and black shirts, with text that says "VICK 'EM" on the front in an apparent reference to the Aggies' slogan "Gig 'em," was created by a Tech student who was trying to sell them before Saturday's game in Lubbock. The back of the shirt shows a football player wearing the No. 7 Vick jersey holding a rope with an image of the mascot Reveille at the end of a noose. Vick, who...

New Jersey Gov. Jon Corzine (D) paid the brother-in-law of his ex-girlfriend $15,000 to quit a Turnpike Authority job last January, the Newark Star Ledger reports. "At the time, reporters had been pressing Corzine's office for answers about [Rocco] Riccio's work record and how he got hired." These revelations add to the scrutiny over numerous gifts Corzine gave Carla Katz, president of the largest state workers union, since their break-up in 2004 -- which Corzine did not disclose when he ran for governor in 2005. Corzine contends the gifts are a personal matter, and says the total was less than...

If someone attacked your mother, would you be upset? Would you protest? I’m sure you would. Well, the Mother of God is grossly insulted by the University of Virginia’s student newspaper, The Cavalier Daily, which printed a Nativity-like cartoon of Our Lady holding the Infant Jesus beside Saint Joseph on August 24. The figure depicting Saint Joseph says: "Mary…I don't mean to ruin this special moment, but how did you get that bumpy rash?” suggesting a sexually transmitted disease. To which a Mary-figure says, “I swear, it was Immaculately Transmitted.” This is outrageous public blasphemy! Click here to protest now....

TORONTO (Reuters) - Condoms are very much in style as a fashion accessory at the International AIDS Conference in Toronto, showing up on strait-laced men, shy teenagers and African grandmothers. "There's a great need to de-stigmatize condoms around the world, especially in Africa," said Franck DeRose, executive director of The Condom Project, which aims to get people comfortable about condoms, especially those living in countries where the little piece of latex is considered taboo. To do that, the project has a program that gets people making their own condom art pin. It all starts with a craft table, packaged condoms,...

Dan Betzer and Louie - "Tell The Bible Classics Volume 3"