'Connectedness,' Not Spanking, Best Way to Raise Kids, Says Author

CNSNews ^ | 4/12/02 | Jason Pierce

[fourdeuce82d]

parents should avoid spanking their children

what does "avoid" mean? Saving it for exceptional misbehavior? Sure. remove it entirely from the pedagogical armementarium? Don't think so.

Kids are all different- some respond to gentle persuasion, others require a bit more vigorous intervention.

[TomServo]

While I don't have any children myself, my brother has no problem with my hand "connecting" with my nieces/nephews butts when they get out of hand.

[Clemenza]

Spare the rod, spoil the child.

[FourtySeven]

'Connectedness,' Not Spanking, Best Way to Raise Kids, Says Author

I agree. When an adult's hand "connects" with a misbehaving child's bottom, this is a good thing.

[AppyPappy]

What an idiot. I guess he believes all children are the same and therefore respond the same to punishment.

[AppyPappy]

Dr. S. DuBose Ravenel

His dad was my doctor.

[twigs]

Spanking and forming emotional connections are not mutually exclusive. In fact, if one spanks biblically, it is a commanded tool for establishing emotional connections.

[HELLRAISER II]

Two words come to mind, Bull $hit! We should not strike our children out of anger, we should not abuse them in any way. But a good well placed throttling definately get's the message across that they shouldn't have done what they did. I know in my case when my dad whipped my butt that I was not going to do that again because the punishment was a detterent.

[sspxsteph]

San Francisco-based clinical psychologist Dr. Theron Alexander
Most psychologist in Kalifornia just don't seem to know how to handle child raising. I was spanked while I was younger, and I have no psychological problems, love my parents, and plan to raise my children the same way.

[egarvue]

And you can't do that by hurting, by control, by rules, regulations and threats," he said.

And this, my friends, is why the much of the Baby Boom generation grew up to be such self-absorbed spoiled brats, and damn near ruined this country - because their parents followed the rearing advice of one Dr. Spock, who spouted pretty much the same psychobabble.

I have a three year old daughter. When she needs it, she gets a spanking, it gets her attention real quick and she learns that she can't continue to do what she was doing wrong. Talking to her, or "connecting", as this fool wants, won't get through to her; she's only three. She doesn't have the capacity to rationalize like this idiot thinks she does. As a parent, I hate doing this - no one wants to cause their child pain. But a little sore bottom now can save the child and their family a lot of pain in the future. This guy is a moron, and most of my fellow Gen-X parents that I know are raising our kids in a totally different fashion than our parents - with rules, regulations, and discipline, because we know that to not discipline your child is to really not love them.

[Snake65]

I was spanked three times as a child, I seem to recall. I was a slow learner, it took me that many times to figure out that my dad didn't make idle threats.

I still honor and adore my father and hope I can do half as well with my own kids.

[qwert]

San Francisco-based clinical psychologist Dr. Theron Alexander
Does this person even have children ?
I bet the answer is no

[ArrogantBustard]

Does this person even have children ?

I wonder if he even engages in the sort of sexual activity that produces children...

[GrandMoM]

post #4 has it right, it comes straight from the bible
SPARE THE ROD, SPOIL THE CHILD!!!!
Discipline, punishment, rules and regulations all mean that there is lack of trust and confidence."
.... most of the parents who raised their kids believing this BS now have their children on Ritlin.

[Icthus]

Nah Nah Nah Nah Nah Nah.....

You cannot spank me!

[Kevin Curry]

"Children whose parents have displayed powerful love and powerful discipline are the children who have the highest level of trust and confidence in their parents."

I don't believe my wife and I ever spanked any of our children more than two or three times. In each instance it was at most a one-or-three swat thing, delivered on a well-diapered behind, and made more noise than anything else. But it startled them and got their attention pronto. We have powerful bonds with our kids. They are well-behaved, cheerful, well-adjusted, successful, and conservative.

But none of our children was stubborn or had a rebellious streak from birth. My wife and I are blessed for that. I know other parents who were not so fortunate. Discipline for such a child is a whole different ball game.

[exmarine]

What a bunch of liberal, empty-headed, pseudo-intellectual takes-a-village-to-raise-a-child, tripe!

The fact is that "experts" like Ravenel are one major rason why people do not know how to be a parent. Americans have come to rely on these idiot "experts" for advice on how to raise children - big mistake! These "experts" don't know manure from apple butter; and now thanks to these expert psychologists, psychiatrists, sociologists (pseudo-sciences), as well as the juvenile justice system, television (as a baby sitter), and tyranical and amoral public schools, most Americans are no longer capable of being a good parent. They have abrogated their responsibilities. Today's parents were yesterday's mis-parented children! You can't pass on to your children what you don't have in the first place!

[John O]

God designed children with a soft padded area full of nerve endings but no easily damaged organs.

God designed adults with harder flattened areas full of nerve endings suitable for detecting exactly how much pressure is being applied to them.

The application of the adult area on the child area is the ideal form of child discipline. This is not an accident.

I have a 17 month old daughter (the most beautiful baby in Indiana) who is just starting to get swatted when she needs it. Do I enjoy it, no. Does it bother me, no. It's just how life is supposed to be. How else will she learn what is acceptable behvior?

I can instantly identify children who have never been disciplined. They are spoiled brats. Normally very loud, rude, and abusive to all around them. When older, normally trapped in a lifestyle of perversion, pregnant, or in prison. (Sometimes, but rarely, they wise up and become parents who spank their children because they realize that kids need discipline)

Bill Cosby has a theory which I share. All children are born with their brains in their behinds and you must warm that area to get their brains to rise with the heat up into their heads. (just kidding a little here, but you can look at almost any child and see they do some pretty stupid things. And then they'll explain why they did them by saying 'I don't know')

God Save America (Please)

[Sangamon Kid]

Alexander adds: "Connectedness does away with conflict in family life."

Uhhh...say what? What's that scripture..."A brother is born for adversity."