Posted on 11/29/2023 7:23:58 PM PST by foundedonpurpose
Freepers, I need some help and advise. The smart asses can take a time out. This has to be dealt with. It's destroyed my life.
Grateful for legit thoughts. I have to get back to who I was.
This cost me my family and everything else. Pre Obama freepers comments preferred. This will take a few days.
Regards!
Founded
First of all... yes, this.
We have to understand that we quite literally cannot do this by ourselves. The problem with ‘sin’ is that it separates us from the creator. Not because the creator won’t commune with us, but because our guilt over our sinful nature, The knowledge of good and evil. Our sinful deeds or the state of our lives. Whatever prevents us from communing with him, that is sin. So go to God. Go to him the way you are. Don’t wait till you’re sober or till you’ve cleaned up. Don’t wait till you’ve showered and thought about it. Go to him in your private room in the middle of the night covered with the dirt, sin, guilt, and grime of the day. Let him do his thing. Don’t let people ruin your joy with a bunch of rules and judgements trying to make you comply with a set of rules. Those are the works of man. All of that will come with time. God will change you. Let him do it. The more you commune with him, the more change will happen. The fruits of the spirit is what it’s called. But that doesn’t happen because of what we do, it’s because of what he does!
When Moses wanted to know the name of the living god who was talking to him from the burning bush he said, “Tell them, “I AM that I AM,”. Sit with God... Read to him from the psalms as a prayer, as if he was there, because He IS there. Acknowledge that and let him heal your spirit. I’m not kidding here, there is so much more to this universe than what we can see or sense or even comprehend. It will feel like a miracle. Just imagine if god is really what it says in the bible?! What if the bible is truth?! How should we acknowledge it? I say... go To Him with the boldness that a son would go to his father. Claim the blood of Jesus has cleansed your sinful nature and let it be so.
And remember, we are all broken and flawed people. You have your struggles and demons. I have my own that I struggle with Every Single Day. I am broken too, just like you. Today we call them ‘addictions’ someone else may have another name for their demons. We don’t need to conquer those demons. We can’t, we need help. We need god to help us. Jesus is the one that makes this possible. He and the Father are one. Call his name, I encourage you, and let him help. Let go and let God. This is what I pray for you... And for me too.
Get well soon my friend
Excessive drinking can also lead to gastritis or inflammation of the stomach lining. Alcohol destroys beneficial bacteria in the gut and depletes the gut of nutrients such as vitamin B and zinc. Frequent and heavy alcohol use can increase the harmful bacteria in the gut.
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So alcohol kills off the good bacteria in your gut, and lets bad ones take over the population down there.
One of the problems you may have is that you have significantly changed what microbes are growing in your gut. What is down there may be producing a significant amount of toxins and other things which are making you feel sick normally. However, you have a drink, and the sensation overwhelms it and you feel better. However you kill off good bacteria, and when the alcohol leaves, there is even more toxins and other crap being produced by those bad bacteria being absorbed into your blood, and you feel even sicker, making you want the next drink even more.
Alcoholics anonymous works for people. However it may do so in part by helping them stay off the booze long enough to repopulate the gut with less toxic bacteria in the absence of the alcohol.
You might benefit by going to a Doctor of Traditional Chinese Medicine, and telling him your situation, and asking for laxative teas in conjunction with his treatments, to get what is down there out in large measure, until things can repopulate in a healthy mix, with his help.
You might find absent all the junk down there now, and with the help of the TCM doc, you can stay away from the booze easier, with less uncomfortable feelings.
I’ve been sober for 33 years by the grace of God and Alcoholics Anonymous.
Go online and find what’s called an ‘’open meeting’’.
It’s just that , an AA meeting open to the public.
You don’t have to give your name or say anything.
Just sit and listen and if you feel you can identify with the speakers stick around at the end of the meeting an talk to one of the group.
If you don’t feel it’s for you , you’re free to refund your misery at the door.
AA is often called ‘’a simple program for complicated people’’.
You don’t need to intellectualize this. Just find a meeting in your area and check it out.
“I used to drink only on weekends. Trouble was my weekends always began on a Monday’’.
I have traveled your path and found my way back to the sunshine. For me, I had to discover what was driving the behavior. Once I corrected that, the alcohol problem went with it.
For me, I was working in Corporate IT and it was the work stress. I got laid off at the outset of COVID and wallowed inside a bottle for a while until I realized I was “free.” Once I discovered I was free from the stress, I found my rational self able to control the impulse to drink.
I now focus on making everywhere I go a better place when I leave. Maybe as simple as I take a cart in from the parking lot when I go to the store. I pick up a lot of trash. Rescue a stray once in a while. I wrangle a few donations for a local food pantry and second hand store. Helping has become my drink of choice.
I hope you find your path back to the sunshine. It is there, you have to muster the will to find it and then find a way to stay in the light.
On a positive note, you just won 80% of the battle by admitting to yourself there is a problem. This is the biggest hurdle and you just cleared it. The rest are much shorter and easier to jump.
Read about an alternative to AA at the link below
https://www.alcoholabuse.com/recovery/recovery-methods/rational-recovery/
AA. I assume they haven’t gone woke.
I went to a 28 day rehab first, then AA every day for a year.
The 28 day programs have “scholarships” for some without insurance or the ability to pay. GO NOW
Contact me by PM if you want.
Call AA and attend a meeting.
DO NOT DRINK TODAY. Take it one day, one hour, one minute, one second at a time, but do not drink alcohol.
Prayer, family, and this book helped me put down the bottle and walk away more than three years ago. The book is simple, short, and just makes sense. I quit during the ‘Rona, became an entrepreneur, and never looked back. God bless. https://www.amazon.com/s?k=stop+drinking+now+allen+carr&crid=P4AHZ6QUM08E&sprefix=Stop+drinking+%2Caps%2C105&ref=nb_sb_ss_ts-doa-p_3_14
My daughter walked into rehab. They put her in the hospital for three days as she figured she better drink a bunch before she checked herself in! But - its been about 1 and 3/4 of a year sober. She gets to at least two AA meetings a week. I’m proud of her for doing this on her own. Most of the folks in rehab were sent there through the courts. Proud of you do for doing it on your own - and continuing to do it!
Find a AA group and work the steps - I’m not much of a joiner or a believer in “counselling”, but after being active in AA for a number of years, I’ve been sober for over 35 years now - I’m still an alcoholic, but I no longer suffer the ravages of active alcoholism. The alcoholic personality rails against taking active measures because it wants to self-destruct...you need to realize that, left to your own devices, you will finfish destroying yourself and then decide you don’t want that to be the outcome.
Good luck
One drink is too many and 1,000 never enough
You are the only one who can make yourself stop drinking. Your will power alone, nobody can help with that. You have to control the voice in your head trying to convince you that you can stop after the weekend, or after Xmas, or New Years, or your Birthday, and even just tomorrow.
AA or other programs are there to help and will help you stay on track and deal with your demons. I attended meetings for 2-3 years and found the continuous stories, of lives falling apart, kept the fear of god in me to not drink. There is no magic cure, you have to stay vigilant, know when your mind is trying to drag you back to drinking and shut it down. Know your short and long term triggers and either avoid them or work to redirect them.
Use all the tools available to get yourself sober. They can support you, but it is you that tips the bottle, or not.
15 years since I have seeked the warm and fuzzy.
I have been married to a recovering alcoholic for over twenty years and if I have learned anything at all by watching her journey (you’ll notice I didn’t say “participating”- only the alcoholic/addict can “fix” this) is this: you need to be among a community of people who have similar experiences and obstacles. Some people poo-poo on twelve step programs, but I believe in them if for no other reason than they get you out of your own head and back into the habit of healthy interactions. They’ve also been there and done that, so they might have some insights. Also, these programs really do work if you commit to them- don’t half-ass it. Having said that, local 12 step programs vary widely in their approaches and appeal- find one that works for you and that you can fully commit to.
There is a yogic saying, that the best way to get rid of a bad habit, is to plant a competing good one, and give that all your attention.
Cultivate your health with diet and exercise. Cultivate your career and finances with goals and disciplined effort. Cultivate your relationships with outreach and consideration of others needs and feelings. Cultivate your heart and soul with religion, and practices like meditation and prayer. Get some music playlists to keep your spirits up and help energize you.
Focus on improving your life and your character, and let the absence of alcohol be just a (necessary) support to that greater, more inspiring effort.
Multiple daily prayer and meditations help. I went from regular daily 4-5 drinks to one glass of wine with dinner and that is often left half drank. Not everyone can do that but it is possible.
Get to an AA meeting. That saved my mom’s life.
L
Allen Carr wrote a book called, “The Easy Way To Control Alcohol”
It’s available on audible. I recommend it highly. It goes through how we have been programed to consume it.
There isn’t pressure in the book to quit immediately. It might be something to listen to if AA pressure isn’t your cup of tea.
Good luck!
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