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You are what you drink
The Denver Post ^ | 3/13/06 | Sheba R. Wheeler

Posted on 03/13/2006 7:32:08 AM PST by Millee

If your date orders a Sex on the Beach, does that foreshadow romance at evening's end?

Don't count on it, but it's a good bet your date is feeling fun and flirty - and wants to let everyone know it.

Experts have made a science out of pegging people's inner qualities based on their outer actions. Personality shows up in everything we do, and folks judge us accordingly.

The music we download, the clothes we wear and the cars we drive reflect who we are, how we view the world and how we choose to interact in it at any given moment, says Cherry Creek psychologist Maximillian Wachtel.

The same principles apply to alcoholic beverages. Particularly so because they often contribute to the first impressions we make on others - sometimes on a date, other times at a business dinner or a family reunion.

But what do they say specifically?

For that we turned to the real experts: bartenders.

Our local mixologists take a lot of orders, and because they work the counters, they hang around long enough to hear customers talk and see how drinkers treat their spouses and sell their goods.

We asked them to share their observations and put together this guide.

Your drink: Beer

Your image: Easygoing

Order a brew, and folks see you as laid-back, reserved and blue-collar. You keep your drinks simple, and maybe that means you are too.

"This person is totally uncomplicated," says Dazzle bartender Jenean Sorenson. "They aren't worried about how old the scotch is. It's an easy decision for them. Their motto would be: 'Just poor it cold into a glass and give it to me.' "

Who are you? You are man, in your mid-30s to 50s, and you definitely have your favorite labels. Or you are a guy in your 20s, and you're broke and drinking $2 Pabst Blue Ribbon drafts. The message is the same: I'm just hanging out.

It's a little different for women, bartenders say. Most gals don't order beer, and the ones that do come off as sexy and approachable.

Why do you drink it? You don't want to get drunk. You just want to sit and talk with your friends, and not end up with a headache the next morning.

Your drink: Martinis, manhattans, champagne

Your image: High maintenance

Use more than two adjectives to order your drink (dry, neat, up, slushy, dirty whatever) or get picky (you want your lemons cut into wedges, not slices) and you can come off as pretentious, says Logan Grey, a bartender at the Roo Bar in Cherry Creek. A colleague, Dustin Gathright, a bartender at the 1876 Bar, agrees. He's happy to make what customers order, but "if a group is waiting to be served and someone comes up and orders something that takes like 15 minutes to make with multiple ingredients, that person is self-centered."

Who are you? When the bartender has the time, you are a sophisticated drinker. When she doesn't, you are a debutante wannabe, or a trendy metrosexual.

Why do you drink it? You just want it the way you want it. You don't realize you are fussy or picky - or maybe you do and simply don't care.

Your drink: Margaritas, piña coladas, mojitos, fruity martinis

Your image: Adventurous

Salted rim or not, asking for a margarita makes you come off as fun-loving. You're not afraid to be goofy. You are trendy and knowledgable about the newest drink-craze flavors like mango and pomegranate and secure enough to sit behind a froufrou cocktail with a tiny umbrella sticking out of the top. "You may not be able to get away to Jamaica just yet, but for tonight, you are just one cocktail away from the dream," says Tracey Toomey, co-author of "The Perfect Manhattan."

Who are you? A bachelorette, a professional woman who just got off work, or part of a girls-night-out gang. A guy looking for a party.

Why do you drink it? It's time to let your hair down for the night. "When I drink a piña colada, I go back to my Puerto Rican roots, and I feel like a hot Latin woman," says Abbie Karic, 53, of New York, who was in Denver last week for a conference.

Your drink: Scotch, bourbon, sauvignon blanc, pinot noir

Your image: Sophisticated

You are knowledgable and enjoy luxuries. You've taken the time to educate yourself about your spirits, have been drinking for a while and know exactly what you want. You are direct, precise and order your beverage straight or on the rocks because you love the taste. "These are the kind of people who would never foul up a good single-malt scotch by mixing it with a Sprite," says Billy Riesing, a bartender at Bender's 13th Avenue Tavern.

Who are you? A man or woman in your mid- to late 30s and beyond.

Why do you drink it? Your palate is complex. You want to savor the drink and sip it. You are too old to handle the hangover that comes from drinking sugary blends. And a fine wine is always an acceptable drink.

Your drink: Chardonnay or merlot; blank and tonic (gin, vodka or whatever)

Your image: Terrified

That's right. You're old standby is actually a dead giveaway, according to bartenders. The scenario: You are on on a first date. You are just getting to know each other, and you are afraid to order. You don't want to play it too safe or edgy because you know first impressions stick. But your choice doesn't show much personality.

"You want to show that you are sophisticated, but not a hard-core drinker," says Doug Kennis, master mixologist at the Grand Hyatt's Pinnacle Club, where customers can fill out a survey measuring their martini personality profile.

Who are you? Part of a potential couple

Why do you drink it? You want to keep your options open. You want to stay out of trouble.


TOPICS: Society
KEYWORDS:
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To: Millee
Does this mean I'm terrified when I have a glass of merlot at at home by myself?
81 posted on 03/13/2006 9:08:43 AM PST by manwiththehands (Islam is as Islam does.)
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To: knews_hound; quantim; spinestein; DTogo; Horatio Gates; Ribeye; decal; B Knotts; doodad; ...

Pinging the real drinkers....

You drink: Homebrew

Why?: Tastes Great and does not feed the Gov't through taxes (It's a far better brew when you know the gov't is getting the screw)

Your image: Image? Whats that? The only images I see are after many homebrews

Who are you? Someone who really enjoys beer. In all it's glory

Why do you drink it? Ummm, have you ever tasted Bud? Ewwwwww-And there we have the true question-has anyone ever really tasted a Bud? After real beer, your quickly realize that Buttwiper has no taste


82 posted on 03/13/2006 9:09:56 AM PST by 5Madman2 (There is no such thing as an experienced suicide bomber)
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To: manwiththehands

>>Does this mean I'm terrified when I have a glass of merlot at at home by myself?

Only if you order it from a non-existant bartender.


83 posted on 03/13/2006 9:12:12 AM PST by Betis70 (zoom zoom)
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To: Betis70

I haven't seen an imaginary bartender yet, but I have cats so I don't have to "drink alone". :-)


84 posted on 03/13/2006 9:19:18 AM PST by manwiththehands (Islam is as Islam does.)
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To: manwiththehands

What do your cats drink?


85 posted on 03/13/2006 9:21:11 AM PST by RockinRight (Attention RNC...we're the party of Reagan, not FDR)
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To: Betis70
Only if you order it from a non-existant bartender.

The Overlook is beautiful in winter, isn't it?

86 posted on 03/13/2006 9:26:28 AM PST by Petronski (I love Cyborg!)
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To: najida

I like a riesling auslese, eiswein and port, occasionally a beer or a frozen mixed drink. I can count on both hands the number of drinks I have in the year.


87 posted on 03/13/2006 9:36:31 AM PST by Chanticleer (Let us speak courteously, deal fairly, and keep ourselves armed and ready. T. Roosevelt)
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To: Millee

"...Your drink: ..... sauvignon blanc, pinot noir...."

That's me!! My two favorite grapes!!


88 posted on 03/13/2006 9:52:37 AM PST by Renfield (If Gene Tracy was the entertainment at your senior prom, YOU might be a redneck...)
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To: Petronski

"....You drink: Banana Daquiris

Your image: Fredo Corleone (listlessness, resentment, naivete)...."

No...Tarzan and a tableful of chimps....remember the old Far Side cartoon ("Guess who wants another tray of banana daquiris...")?


89 posted on 03/13/2006 9:54:34 AM PST by Renfield (If Gene Tracy was the entertainment at your senior prom, YOU might be a redneck...)
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To: motormouth

Better be lining up that future liver transplant....


90 posted on 03/13/2006 9:56:02 AM PST by Renfield (If Gene Tracy was the entertainment at your senior prom, YOU might be a redneck...)
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To: Millee
You are what you drink

Caffeinated and fizzy?

91 posted on 03/13/2006 9:56:13 AM PST by kevkrom ("...no one has ever successfully waged a war against stupidity" - Orson Scott Card)
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To: knews_hound

I was president of a brew club for years. Then, I moved to a place with foul tap water (I didn't taste the water before I bought the house) and had to give it up.


92 posted on 03/13/2006 9:59:33 AM PST by Renfield (If Gene Tracy was the entertainment at your senior prom, YOU might be a redneck...)
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To: Renfield

Sorry, the Banana Daquiri is Fredo Corleone. Godfather II teaches us that.




Fredo: How do you say Banana Daquiri in Spanish?

Michael: Banana Daquiri.

Fredo: Really?


93 posted on 03/13/2006 10:05:14 AM PST by Petronski (I love Cyborg!)
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To: Renfield
My brother has the same problem, his solution?

He buys "spring water" on sale for 50 cents a gallon at Walmart or where ever.

Works like a champ.

Small price to pay for homebrew.

Something to consider at any rate.

Cheers,

knewshound

http://knewshound.blogspot.com/
94 posted on 03/13/2006 10:32:31 AM PST by knews_hound (Now with two handed typing !)
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To: Renfield

My brother has the same problem, his solution?

He buys "spring water" on sale for 50 cents a gallon at Walmart or where ever.

Works like a champ.

Small price to pay for homebrew.

Something to concider at any rate.

Cheers,

knewshound

http://knewshound.blogspot.com/


95 posted on 03/13/2006 10:34:50 AM PST by knews_hound (Now with two handed typing !)
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To: knews_hound
I've got great tap water but still brew with Walmart water. Too much time into it to take any chances. You never know if there's some rogue microbe hanging out on the spigot.
96 posted on 03/13/2006 10:41:11 AM PST by Horatio Gates (Islam is an exercise in fatality.)
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To: knews_hound

LOL...I actually got into "trouble" with the wife for grabbing 5 gallons out of the emergency/disaster supply on one brewing session


97 posted on 03/13/2006 10:43:31 AM PST by Horatio Gates (Islam is an exercise in fatality.)
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To: Millee
Seems to me like a White Russian would be the ultimate symbol of a laid back person.


98 posted on 03/13/2006 10:46:55 AM PST by Mr. Blonde (You know, Happy Time Harry, just being around you kinda makes me want to die.)
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To: Horatio Gates

My brothers water is so bad, pitching yeast is an adventure.

You can bruise your knuckles it is so hard.

After making a dozen batches, none of which would ever finish, he gave up and went the Wal Mart route.

He has never looked back !

Cheers,

knewshound

http://knewshound.blogspot.com/


99 posted on 03/13/2006 10:47:13 AM PST by knews_hound (Now with two handed typing !)
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To: martin_fierro
Your image ...
Took me a sec ... ;-)
100 posted on 03/13/2006 10:50:32 AM PST by Tunehead54 (Old Bushmills - easy on the ice - Thanks!)
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