Posted on 03/10/2012 3:58:20 PM PST by NKP_Vet
TWO NUNS WERE SHOPPING AT A 7-11 STORE. AS THEY PASSED BY THE BEER COOLER, ONE NUN SAID TO THE OTHER, "WOULDN'T A NICE COOL BEER OR TWO TASTE WONDERFUL ON A HOT SUMMER EVENING?"
THE SECOND NUN ANSWERED, "INDEED IT WOULD, SISTER, BUT I WOULD NOT FEEL COMFORTABLE BUYING BEER, SINCE I AM CERTAIN IT WOULD CAUSE A SCENE AT THE CHECKOUT STAND."
"I CAN HANDLE THAT WITHOUT A PROBLEM" THE OTHER NUN REPLIED AND SHE PICKED UP A SIX-PACK AND HEADED FOR THE CHECK-OUT.
THE CASHIER HAD A SURPRISED LOOK ON HIS FACE WHEN THE TWO NUNS ARRIVED WITH A SIX-PACK OF BEER.
"WE USE BEER FOR WASHING OUR HAIR. "THE NUN SAID, "BACK AT OUR NUNNERY, WE CALL IT CATHOLIC SHAMPOO."
WITHOUT BLINKING AN EYE, THE CASHIER REACHED UNDER THE COUNTER.PULLED OUT A PACKAGE OF PRETZEL STICKS, AND PLACED THEM IN THE BAG WITH THE BEER.
HE THEN LOOKED THE NUN STRAIGHT IN THE EYE, SMILED, AND SAID: "THE CURLERS ARE ON THE HOUSE. HAVE A WONDERFUL AFTERNOON".
Basic formatting:
Line break <br>
Paragraph break <p>
<blockquote>
Indented paragraphs</blockquote>
<font size=1>Smallest FR font</font> Displays as:
Smallest FR font
<font size=7>Largest FR font<font> Displays as:
Largest FR font
Or
Step font size up or down with <big>bigger</big>
and <small>smaller</small>
"Hidden" text: <font color=white> White font </font>
Drag cursor over blank area to highlight to read...
Posting a link:
General:
<a href=[web address]>[title]< /a>
Example:
This: <a href="http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/1179145/posts">Iran starts atom tests in defiance of EU deal</a>
Posts as this:
Iran starts atom tests in defiance of EU deal
Posting an image:
General:
<img src="[web server location]">
Clarity is needed - you can't just snag a favorite picture from a desktop folder...it has to be hosted someplace to be transferrable to our posts. ~ ErnBatavia
Example:
This: <img src="http://www.notablebiographies.com/images/uewb_09_img0611.jpg">
Posts this:
Tip: control the size with "height=nnn" like so:
This: <img height= 200 src="http://www.notablebiographies.com/images/uewb_09_img0611.jpg">
Posts this:
While This: <img height= 100 src="http://www.notablebiographies.com/images/uewb_09_img0611.jpg">
Posts this:
I like this Benjamin Franklin quote, “Beer is proof that God loves us, and wants us to be happy.”
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.