Posted on 04/26/2012 3:59:31 PM PDT by jacquej
A story and two questions on the New York state English exam taken by eighth-graders this week has stumped many — including Jeopardy! star Ken Jennings.
The story — titled The Pineapple and the Hare — was included in a New York Daily News story about the consternation the questions have caused.
(Excerpt) Read more at npr.org ...
Just so you all know that teachers aren't all at fault. How can they deal with these "performance" exams with questions like this?
ginp
Didn’t Maya Angelou read this at Clinton’s inauguration?
OK, here is the actual link to the NYS test. All Freepers are now required to answer the questions, and then justify their answers.
I need some humor today, and I know you all are the very best, even though it isn’t Friday. But, we are close, right?
Whiskey Tango Foxtrot?
Whoever wrote the question, judging by the syntax, seems to not have a very good grasp of our language.
Yes, but from the point of view of the crow.
Where is here. Being the actual link to the test?
Someone’s smoking something.
It should be “like you and I”.
Answers/Justifications:
1.) A bungee cord/Because of the owl.
2.) See #1.
It is a political allegory. The hare is Obama. The other animals are the gullible public. The pineapple is the national debt. The pineapple never really spoke; the hare is a ventriloquist. The hare confused and misdirected the other animals and then took off running. It was never seen again. The other animals (the public) were left with nothing but the debt which they were forced to eat. The End.
The Pineapple is a metaphor for social justice.
The author has all but disowned this piece of writing...because he’d never sell another book to the Education Department if he didn’t.
Looks like what a night of dreams might yield up after spending the evening reading Aesop’s fables.
Hmmm, SpongeBob lives in a pineapple under the sea.....
Good Grief! Do you mean to tell me that my grandchildren have to answer questions like this on the state exam?
In the olden times, animals could speak English, just like you and me. There was a lovely enchanted forest that flourished with a bunch of these magical animals. One day, a hare was relaxing by a tree. All of a sudden, he noticed a pineapple sitting near him.
The hare, being magical and all, told the pineapple, “Um, hi.” The pineapple could speak English too.
“I challenge you to a race! Whoever makes it across the forest and back first wins a ninja! And a lifetime’s supply of toothpaste!” The hare looked at the pineapple strangely, but agreed to the race.
The next day, the competition was coming into play. All the animals in the forest (but not the pineapples, for pineapples are immobile) arranged a finish/start line in between two trees. The coyote placed the pineapple in front of the starting line, and the hare was on his way.
Everyone on the sidelines was bustling about and chatting about the obvious prediction that the hare was going to claim the victory (and the ninja and the toothpaste). Suddenly, the crow had a revolutionary realization.
“AAAAIEEH! Friends! I have an idea to share! The pineapple has not challenged our good companion, the hare, to just a simple race! Surely the pineapple must know that he CANNOT MOVE! He obviously has a trick up his sleeve!” exclaimed the crow.
The moose spoke up.
“Pineapples don’t have sleeves.”
“You fool! You know what I mean! I think that the pineapple knows we’re cheering for the hare, so he is planning to pull a trick on us, so we look foolish when he wins! Let’s sink the pineapple’s intentions, and let’s cheer for the stupid fruit!” the crow passionately proclaimed. The other animals cheered, and started chanting, “FOIL THE PLAN! FOIL THE PLAN! FOIL THE PLAN!”
A few minutes later, the hare arrived. He got into place next to the pineapple, who sat there contently. The monkey blew the tree-bark whistle, and the race began! The hare took off, sprinting through the forest, and the pineapple ...
It sat there.
The animals glanced at each other blankly, and then started to realize how dumb they were. The pineapple did not have a trick up its sleeve. It wanted an honest race — but it knew it couldn’t walk (let alone run)!
About a few hours later, the hare came into sight again. It flew right across the finish line, still as fast as it was when it first took off. The hare had won, but the pineapple still sat at his starting point, and had not even budged.
The animals ate the pineapple.
And the two questions:
1. Why did the animals eat the pineapple?
a. they were annoyed
b. they were amused
c. they were hungry
d. they wanted to
2. Who was the wisest?
a. the hare
b. moose
c. crow
d. owl
Q. “When does the narwhal bacon?”
A. “At midnight”
Now you know.
6. B
7. C
8. D
9. A
10. D
11. C
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