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***THE OFFICIAL FRIDAY SILLINESS THREAD***
Posted on 07/31/2015 5:41:28 AM PDT by Lucky9teen
Quick...let's all be silly!
RANDOM SILLINESS BEGINS......NOW....
White man problems...
A teacher is explaining biology to her 4th grade students. "Human beings are the only animals that stutter," she says.
A little girl raises her hand. "I had a little cat who stuttered."
The teacher, knowing how precious some of these stories could become, asked the girl to describe the incident.
"Well," she began, "I was in the back yard with my kitty and the Rottweiler that lives next door named Lacey, got a running start and before we knew it, he jumped over the fence into our yard!''
"That must've been scary," said the teacher.
"It sure was," said the little girl. "My kitty raised her back, went 'Ffffff!, Ffffff!, FfffffF,' but before she could say 'F***-off'!, the Rottweiler ate her!"
A firefighter was working on the engine outside the Station, when he noticed a little girl nearby in a little red wagon with little ladders hung off the sides and a garden hose tightly coiled in the middle.
The girl was wearing a firefighter’s helmet.
The wagon was being pulled by her dog and her cat.
The firefighter walked over to take a closer look.
'That sure is a nice fire truck,' the firefighter said with admiration.
'Thanks,' the girl replied. The firefighter looked a little closer. The girl had tied the wagon to her dog's collar and to the cat's testicles.
'Little partner,' the firefighter said, 'I don't want to tell you how to run your rig, but if you were to tie that rope around the cat's collar, I think you could go faster.’
The little girl replied thoughtfully, "You're probably right, but then I wouldn't have a siren."
A man is stuck in traffic on I-25 near Denver. He asks a Police officer about the delay as he walks from car to car speaking with each of the drivers.
The policeman says, "There are three Muslims blocking traffic and threatening to douse themselves with gas and set themselves on fire if we don't get them airline tickets to the Middle East. So we're taking up a collection for them."
The Man replies, "How much have you got so far?"
The Policeman responds, "About 30 gallons, but a lot of people are still siphoning."
TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: ofst; silliness
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Can everyone squeeze in?
To: Lucky9teen
2
posted on
07/31/2015 5:42:52 AM PDT
by
ShadowAce
(Linux - The Ultimate Windows Service Pack)
To: ShadowAce
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO TGIF
TOP 10!
To: Lucky9teen
IN!!! ( before it’s outlawed).
4
posted on
07/31/2015 5:45:51 AM PDT
by
TADSLOS
(A Ted Cruz Happy Warrior! GO TED!)
To: Currentriverrat
5
posted on
07/31/2015 5:46:04 AM PDT
by
AppyPappy
To: 2111USMC; 21stCenturion; 2ndDivisionVet; 3AngelaD; 4mycountry; 5Madman2; 6amgelsmama; 88keys; ...
CLICK HERE TO BE INCLUDED OR TAKEN OFF THE LIST
Loverboy
9 inch nails
Tears for fears
Egyptian Lover
English Beat
Naked Eyes
6
posted on
07/31/2015 5:46:57 AM PDT
by
Lucky9teen
(Justice will not be served until those who r unaffected r as outraged as those who r. B Franklin)
To: ShadowAce
7
posted on
07/31/2015 5:47:58 AM PDT
by
left that other site
(You shall know the Truth, and The Truth Shall Set You Free.)
To: AppyPappy
8
posted on
07/31/2015 5:48:50 AM PDT
by
Lucky9teen
(Justice will not be served until those who r unaffected r as outraged as those who r. B Franklin)
To: Lucky9teen
Top ten! First time! Woo hoo!
9
posted on
07/31/2015 5:48:52 AM PDT
by
RepRivFarm
("During times of universal deceit, telling the truth becomes a revolutionary act." -George Orwell)
To: Lucky9teen
10
posted on
07/31/2015 5:49:03 AM PDT
by
RandallFlagg
(With the things that are about to come to light. People might just need a little old-fashioned.)
To: Lucky9teen
“Egyptian Lover?!”
I thought I was the only one who’d remember them.
11
posted on
07/31/2015 5:50:48 AM PDT
by
RandallFlagg
(With the things that are about to come to light. People might just need a little old-fashioned.)
To: Lucky9teen
Great start!
Thanks, as always, for the pingywingy.
And have a great weekend.
cheers
Jim
12
posted on
07/31/2015 5:51:01 AM PDT
by
gymbeau
(I have already previewed or do not wish to preview this composition.)
To: Lucky9teen
Metallica
Anthrax
REM
Yes
Led Zeppelin
Ozzy
UB40
13
posted on
07/31/2015 5:54:41 AM PDT
by
left that other site
(You shall know the Truth, and The Truth Shall Set You Free.)
To: Lucky9teen
14
posted on
07/31/2015 5:56:13 AM PDT
by
ShadowAce
(Linux - The Ultimate Windows Service Pack)
To: Lucky9teen
15
posted on
07/31/2015 5:57:00 AM PDT
by
Heartlander
(Prediction: Increasingly, logic will be seen as a covert form of theism. - Denyse OÂ’Leary)
To: Lucky9teen
Chicago
Ac/Dc
Lynyrd Skynyrd
Ian Hunter
Faces
Rolling Stones
Eagles
Aerosmith
Kansas
16
posted on
07/31/2015 6:03:55 AM PDT
by
Califreak
(Hope and Che'nge is killing U.S. Feel the Trump-mentum!)
To: Lucky9teen
Slade
Humble Pie
Argent
DC Talk
Ozark Mountain Daredevils
War
Alice Cooper
Clash
Edgar Winter Group
17
posted on
07/31/2015 6:08:38 AM PDT
by
ShadowAce
(Linux - The Ultimate Windows Service Pack)
To: Lucky9teen
Nilsson
ozzy
nirvana
Leon Russell
incubus
nils Lofgren
everclear
aerosmith
radiohead
18
posted on
07/31/2015 6:12:29 AM PDT
by
NonLinear
(Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys.)
To: Lucky9teen
Men at Work
Yo Yo Ma
Kiss
Robert Palmer
Oak Ridge Boys
AC/DC
Rolling Stones
19
posted on
07/31/2015 6:22:32 AM PDT
by
mykroar
("Never believe anything until it has been officially denied." - Otto von Bismarck)
To: Lucky9teen
TOP...Something!!
:o])
YAY, Friday!
20
posted on
07/31/2015 6:26:32 AM PDT
by
Monkey Face
(I hate spelling errors. You mix up two letters and your whole post is urined.)
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