Posted on 11/06/2015 11:06:03 AM PST by Heartlander
If you thought we were the first generation who liked to get our drink on, then you are sadly mistaken. Yes indeed, our forefathers and their forefathers and THEIR forefathers all liked to wet their whistles and get a little tipsy. You know how sometimes, when you have a few too many, you start to spit out random facts about things you didn't even realize you knew? Well, put your party hat on, because here are 17 historical facts about booze that will leave you laughing.
When the ancient tribes first started learning about farming, they also stumbled upon the process of making good old fashioned booze. In fact, in their attempts to feed their beer guts, these ancestors may have even inspired the new agricultural technologies that would eventually lead to the Neolithic Revolution. Cheers to that!
I'm pretty sure this was the very first form of the party foul. Screw up a game of beer pong - finish your drink. Ruin a batch in Ancient Babylonia - drown yourself in it. Rules are rules, folks.
Way before your mom's tuna fish casserole and Uncle Pete's famous artery - clogging meatball sandwiches, the world was trying to find a way to quench their thirst and get the party started. You've got to flip to the very first page of historical recipes for this one.
Before pounding a few back, sailors used to mix their rum with gunpowder and try igniting it. If It caught fire, or blew up, it was good rum. Seems logical enough.
Hey, sometimes when you can't find a clean shot glass you have to improvise. Who knew the vikings were so damn resourceful?
Clean water wasn't at the top of the grocery list when the Puritans were preparing for their voyage aboard the Mayflower, but as long as they have enough wine and beer what could possibly go wrong?
Sir Winston may have been one of the greatest wartime leaders of all time, but his mother was allegedly the one who gave the world a fancy new drink to sip on - both of which are incredibly admirable actions. Thank you, Churchill's, for changing the world for the better.
The workers at Giza used to receive about 4 litres of beer a day. The only thing I've built with 4 litres of beer is a bad reputation.
In the wonderful afterlife of Valhalla, the vikings believed there would be a goat who produced beer instead of milk. As cool as that would be, I think I'd still prefer a pint poured from a keg, thank you very much.
Poor old Freddie The Great - all he wanted to do was party, but instead people had to drink their precious coffee. Here's to you, Freddie!
Yes, one of the main reasons the Pilgrims decided to stop at Plymouth Rock was due to the fact that their cooler was empty. Desperately looking for the nearest liquor store, they just so happened to stumble across the Native Americans. The rest, of course, is history.
People have been trying to tie one on since the earliest days of agriculture. People didn't really care about growing their own food, they just wanted to get a little tipsy — the food thing was probably just a coincidence.
It was a huge "Party In The USA" when the government acknowledged bourbon as the country's drink of choice. Even though she wasn't born yet, I like to imagine Congress rocking out to Miley Cyrus' tunes while sharing a few glasses of bourbon—that's the America I want to live in.
Honest Abe loved to kick back with a cold one after a hard day of running the country. In fact, in his spare time he could be found tending bar at one of his many taverns. Wouldn't "Honest Abe's" be a wicked bar name?
Many historians have documented the fact that Magellan loved to drink Sherry so much that he actually packed his ship with more booze than weaponry when he was preparing for his voyage. That's right, not only did Magellan organize the Spanish Inquisition, but he also performed the first real road trip.
We've all experienced the massive food hangover after a few too many plates of Thanksgiving turkey, but the pilgrims and their hosts probably experienced real hangovers after a meal that consisted of wine, beer and other party drinks.
Even the first president needed to get away from it all once in a while. His version of a man cave was his own personal brewhouse where he'd often escape to whenever Martha would try to get him to talk about their relationship.
18. The Puritans had a pub by/near their churches. During breaks in the all day worship, which was common for all Christians back in the day, they would quench their thirst and go back for some more worship.
Interesting, but hardly hilarious...
Party on, historians!
#6 - if you’re going on a long sea voyage with 17th-century food storage technology, you’re going to take your water in the form of wine/beer to make sure it doesn’t cultivate nasty microbes (the alcohol killing off anything that would otherwise grow in water). Wine/beer in addition are, well, basically liquid fruit & bread - a lot easier to store & transport (weight aside) in liquid form than trying to keep from rotting on shelves. Alcoholic side effects, well, gosh darn.
If you thought we were the first generation who liked to get our drink on…Why would anyone think such a thing? Is the generation referred to therein that much dumbed down now?
Another episode of Drunk History.
look up ‘churchill’s hiccup’, or ‘winston’s hiccup’. i’m sure most of southern jordan knows that story
beer was preferred aboard ship not necessarily because of its effects, but because water would go bad and sicken the crew after a voyage of even moderate length.
This is one of my favorite pieces of alcohol history:
“Indeed, we still have available the bar tab from a 1787 farewell party in Philadelphia for George Washington just days before the framers signed off on the Constitution. According to the bill preserved from the evening, the 55 attendees drank 54 bottles of Madeira, 60 bottles of claret, eight of whiskey, 22 of porter, eight of hard cider, 12 of beer, and seven bowls of alcoholic punch.”
Alcohol is a solution. Just ask any chemist.
19. After putting down the Whiskey Rebellion, aka, “The Competition”, Washington built one of the largest distilleries in the new nation at Mt. Vernon.
Hilarious? I don’t think so. A bunch of made up, inacurate crap is more like it.
Sea voyage or not, alcohol in any sort of beverage was a good thing.
Everyone brings out the choice wine first and then the cheaper wine after the guests have had too much to drink; but you have saved the best till now.
John 2:10
You’re right. I love trivia but this is a silly piece.
Of course. Just like how Napoleon crossed the Delaware. /s
It also began the famous line: Hold me mug and watch this!......................
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