Posted on 08/16/2006 1:38:41 PM PDT by PJ-Comix
Remember the movie, It's A Wonderful Life?. In it the James Stewart character was allowed to see how miserable things would have been for his home town if he had never been alive. The DUmmies are now doing just the opposite. They are fantasizing about what a WONDERFUL paradise we would now be living in if only Al Gore had become President in 2001 as you can see in this DUmmie FANTASY titled, "Finish the following sentence... If Al Gore were president..." In the REAL reality, it is like Paradise Lost for the DUmmies. All their frustrations can be traced back to Al Gore LOSING back in 2000 and it has been downhill for them ever since. So let us now indulge their fantasies in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, wondering if he would have been on Karenna's dance ticket at the 2000 Gore Inaugural Ball, is in the [brackets]:
Finish the following sentence... If Al Gore were president...
[I'll give it a try as soon as I quit laughing.]
If Al Gore were president, all the US soldiers and Iraqis killed in Bush's Iraq adventure would be alive today. Mind-blowing to think about it, isn't it?
[If Al Gore were president, we would still be debating whether to institute economic sanctions on the Taliban. Mind-blowing to think about it, isn't it?]
911 would not have happened.
[Yeah. The terrorists would have been so humbled by the awesome presence of President Al Gore that the thought of perpetrating 911 would never have occured to them.]
9/11 would NOT have happened.
[Another DUmmie chimes in with the same fantasy.]
No 9-11 scale attack would have happened.
[When it rains DUmmie fantasies, it POURS.]
we would either be driving electric high-breads or Smart cars, ...the nation would be building an intra and interstate mass transit system based on magnetic levitation trains, cold fusion electrical generation would be a reality, the federal debt would be two thirds paid off, America's standard of living would have advanced to almost total elimination of poverty and hunger, America would have a national health care insurance program for everyone and the republican party would have all but disappeared.
[Everybody would be driving around in clean energy hovercraft and the EVIL Republicans would have voluntarily jumped into a giant quicksand pit.]
nothing of the last 5 and 1/2 years would have happened. gutting of or social programs, tax cuts wouldn't have happened, at least until the debt was paid off and it would have under the policies of an Al Gore Administration. the only problem with all this is I have to come back to reality and face the music of now.
[Tax cuts wouldn't have happened. Taxes would have been RAISED. Isn't that just wuuuunderful!!!]
Life would be wonderful!!! I wouldn't have to apologize to my grandkids for the horrid world I'm leaving them, and we wouldn't be banging our heads against the wall at all the incredible events that we have before us, today. Just think of all the citizens of the world who would still be living.
[Life would be wuuuuunnnnnderful!!! Even our doo-doo wouldn't stink!]
. . . . the Kyoto Accord would be seen as the first step . . . toward a solution to global warning.
[The Kyoto Accord would have limited the hot air emissions from Al Gore's mouth.]
I would be looking into earning a Bachelor's Degree after I get my Associate's Degree. I would have the confidence that I could possibly get a damn job after graduating AND continue my education.
[I wouldn't be drooling like a moronic loser blaming his personal failures on Bush.]
If Al Gore was president, I would be able to use the Pell Grant and probably other educational incentives to become a teacher (community college, not K-12) or anything else I wanted to become. As it stands now, I'll be lucky to get a 2 year degree at all, much less try for a 4 year degree. And I'll be lucky if I can find a damn job at all.
[As it is now, you'll be lucky to cross a street without drenching yourself in self-pitying drool.]
My House Wouldn't Be So Filthy
[And your body odor would be tolerable.]
The angels would not be weeping.
[The Jason Leopolds would not be leaping.]
...I would be sleeping better at night.
[Your constipation would be cured.]
Many of my friends and fellow citizens would still be alive in New Orleans
[Katrina would have swerved away from the Gulf Coast under a President Al Gore.]
The whole world would be a better place!
[The WHOLE UNIVERSE would be just hunky-dory!]
Social Security would be in a lock box safe from the pork stained hands of the Bushites.
[Would prosthetic crotch enhancers also be in that lock box?]
the after affects of the whore Katrina wouldnt have existed. Period.
[Katrina wouldn't have even existed. Period.]
California and the rest of the west wouldn't keep burning every year. We would have had systems installed to contain the fires or strips of land converted to be used as fire breaks or both.
[There would have been automatic sprinkler systems in the middle of the wilderness and FREE gumdrops for all!]
Hey that's good stuff!! Thanks for the link, Ye.
These are the same tree huggers that wouldn't allow firebreaks to be cleared in Scripps Ranch (San Diego). Of course nearly all the houses in Scripps Ranch were destroyed by fire a couple of years ago, while those homes that had been cleared of brush survived.
Idiots.
If Al Gore was president "MACACAS WOULD FLY OUT OF MY BUTT!" I always wanted that to happen! OH WHY OH WHY ISN"T HE PRESIDENT????
Glad you like it. I hope every FReeper prints that out and posts it prominently in their place if business, where co-workers and customers will see the truth.
I am sick to death of the doom and gloom. We may have a handul of things going the wrong way, but dozens are right.
"high-breads"?
"I would be looking into earning a Bachelor's Degree after I get my Associate's Degree. I would have the confidence that I could possibly get a damn job after graduating AND continue my education"
You're lazy and blaming President Bush as an excuse. The economy is great and unemployment is low. Lots of opportunity for someone who will get off their butt and do something.
ROFL!
A DUFU hat trick. Just what are these people on, anyway? Whatever it is, it can't be legal.
"If Al Gore was President"
I wouldn't have to listen to people talk about how great his stupid movie is.
They've been eating some of those "high-breads".
These are the same losers who all sit around and auto-eroticate themselves to the ideas of Guevera, Castro and Kim Jong Il.
>They've been eating some of those "high-breads"
"High-breads" = Alice B. Toklas brownies.
Just a friendly reminder; only 4.25 more days until August 22nd.
That's the day the DUmmies predicted (a) Armageddon, or (b) the invasion of Iran, or (c) the rapture, or (d) the indictment of Karl Rove.
I personally think--although I've been wrong before, too many times to count--the odds of the Bostonian Drunkard getting clean and sober are better than (a), (b), (c), or (d) above.
Fat chance.
Psst! There are NOW 899 PINGees on the DUFU PING List.
Ha ha, yeah! Because, like, we all know that there were no such things as hurricanes before the Industrial Revolution and its eeeeevviillllll man-made greenhouse gases. Nope, no hurricanes before then. Never ever.
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