Posted on 11/07/2010 9:23:01 AM PST by pickrell
Over the last few months Barack Obama, Joe Biden and other Democrat power players bought season tickets here to Ohio's political podiums. Ours was a state that had to be won decisively in order for the agenda of change to be advanced, and so every third day saw the liberal media highlighting yet another trip by the Dynastic Duo to our Buckeyeland, (or as Barack referred to it, "...our 59th state.") When such overwhelming time, money and the remaining dregs of political capital are spent in one state, the outcome, sadly, is a foregone conclusion.
On election night, the Democrats swept the state, as the mainstream media is currently explaining, and cleverly boxed the Republicans into a corner. By saddling the Republicans with an enormous amount of new responsibilities, i.e. office staffing to organize, research into ways to break up the tidal wave of previous state spending levels, and other nonsense issues, the Democrats hope to divert their opponents, and the public's, attention from the important business of finally helping Nancy Pelosi to get in some quality vacation time.
It was an inspired example of rope-a-dope... without the rope. They have thoroughly beaten up Palin and DeMint's fists, with their faces. Soon, they know, the conservatives will tire...
Given the Democrats' clear mandate by the voters to turn off the lights as they leave, and drop the keys off at the nearest Republican headquarters, the media now seem to have their network anchors suddenly donning red blazers, and advising the incoming bigots, racists, (and- oh,yes, tea baggers-) as to how they can reduce the acidity of the political process.
We are advised that compromise is the only hope the Republicans have of surviving this debacle. That any ill-advised overreaching, threatening the sacred political pillars of illegal immigrant rights, the Ponzinomics of Social Security, the healthly growth of job-building national debt, and the beloved national restructuring of reality envisioned by health care legislation, will result in a backlash.
The relatively unimportant fact that a frontlash has sent a number of such forward thinking incumbents to spend "more time with their families", is merely a conservative attempt to re-write history.
As such, Ohio's John Boehner is advised to seek compromise. We agree. Some trading may be advisable.
We could extend diplomatic immunity to all future cash discovered in raids of Democrats' freezers, in exchange for their solemn guarantee that they will in future, insure that the Presidential team spends at least as much time campaigning in Ohio as happened this year. You may throw us in dat briar patch again, brer fox. We can swap credit for new jobs created at a Toledo teleprompter assembly plant in their list of accomplishments, for promises not to let Pelosi and Reid ever leave the limelight. [ Aside to Boehner: Please, please, urge Nancy Pelosi to assure America that the Dems will actually gain seats each election. ]
The important thing will be to keep such deals from the attention of the Fox News people. It has been rumored that a number of liberals are considering watching Fox news in future- after a strict regimen of innoculations, of course. Word might leak out.
Say instead that this 2000 page package of deals is too massive to explain to the public- that we will just have to find out what is in it, after we broker and seal the agreement.
And remember most of all that the acrimony during our previous biggest win, which swept Ronald Reagan into office, indirectly lead to a nutjob like Hinckley wishing to impress Jodie Foster by taking a shot at Reagan.
Please America, let no vigilante pick up a package of anti-psychosis suppositories, track down Ms. Pelosi, and try to impress Pee Wee Herman.
Can't we all just get along?
Sounds like somebody’s been reading to much media matters trash.
This sounds like the ramblings of a nut or as democrap with mental problems.
Find a dictionary, and look up the word ‘satire’. Go ahead, I’ll wait.
Now do you get it?
No time for compromise. Elections have consequences. The founding principles of this country are God-given liberty and opportunity, not God-given entitlement checks.
LOL, more SNL than AZ Conservative, but still funny.
Your article has a lot of truth. Do you ever wish there were more people on Free Republic who would read more than the headline before they post a comment? I swear it seems like some here are trying to give conservatives a bad name.
I know what you mean. There are a number of us who don't post satire as much nowadays as we used to, for that very reason. You can, of course,craft your posts to make the satire more obvious, dialing it all the way up to "2 by 4 between the eyes" if necessary, but then you lose much if not all of it's flavor.
Mostly we post because a few of you folks are quite sharp and fun to try to get a smile out of. :-)
You guys have a good Sunday, and don't forget to turn the clocks back.
Satire has to make sense this is giberish....
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