Free Republic
Browse · Search
Bloggers & Personal
Topics · Post Article

Skip to comments.

Budget cuts push flight security back to pre-9/11 risks
BizPacReview.com ^ | February 20, 2012 | Michael Dorstewitz

Posted on 02/20/2012 5:46:21 AM PST by cap10mike

A United Airlines flight has taken off from New York without incident, and is now winging its way toward Los Angeles. Some passengers are readying their iPads and notebook computers in anticipation of an OK from the crew to power up their devices. Others are settling into their seats with a good book, or maybe a few winks of much-needed sleep. As the plane begins to level off at its assigned cruising altitude, the “Fasten Seat Belt” light is finally extinguished. That’s when all hell breaks loose.

Three burly terrorists rush the cockpit door and ....


TOPICS: Government; Politics
KEYWORDS: airline; budget; cuts; security
Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first previous 1-2021-4041-53 next last
To: Lazamataz

ok that one was good


21 posted on 02/20/2012 6:39:33 AM PST by driftdiver (I could eat it raw, but why do that when I have a fire.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 13 | View Replies]

To: raybbr
Three burly terrorists rush the cockpit door and ....

..... one little old nun said to them, "Now you boys behave!" and they all went back to their seats.

22 posted on 02/20/2012 6:39:39 AM PST by Lazamataz (If you only think about a diet, only your brain loses weight.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 15 | View Replies]

To: raybbr
Three burly terrorists rush the cockpit door and ....

..... once the confusion subsided, we discovered they were not terrorists. They were the flight crew! The plane had been flown by trained monkeys up until then!

23 posted on 02/20/2012 6:40:50 AM PST by Lazamataz (If you only think about a diet, only your brain loses weight.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 15 | View Replies]

To: Lazamataz

Three burly terrorists rush the cockpit door and ....

Find three scantly clad buxom pilots awaiting them...*hey baby, you wanna know why they call it a cockpit?*

Cue the music...


24 posted on 02/20/2012 6:41:03 AM PST by wyokostur
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 14 | View Replies]

To: driftdiver
ONE??!!??

Every one of them is a gem.

25 posted on 02/20/2012 6:42:14 AM PST by Lazamataz (If you only think about a diet, only your brain loses weight.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 21 | View Replies]

To: wyokostur

OMG LOL! That make me choke!


26 posted on 02/20/2012 6:42:45 AM PST by Lazamataz (If you only think about a diet, only your brain loses weight.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 24 | View Replies]

To: driftdiver

Exactly. There’s gonna be some hajji blood on the floor before it’s over.


27 posted on 02/20/2012 6:42:50 AM PST by NVDave
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 2 | View Replies]

To: raybbr
Three burly terrorists rush the cockpit door and ....

.... after intervening, the stewardess found out they were not terrorists. They were the Albanian weightlifting team, who realized they had upgrades to first class coming.

28 posted on 02/20/2012 6:44:55 AM PST by Lazamataz (If you only think about a diet, only your brain loses weight.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 22 | View Replies]

To: raybbr
Three burly terrorists rush the cockpit door and ....

.... asked politely if the plane could turn around. They had forgotten their prayer rugs.

29 posted on 02/20/2012 6:45:54 AM PST by Lazamataz (If you only think about a diet, only your brain loses weight.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 22 | View Replies]

To: Lazamataz
ONE??!!?? Every one of them is a gem.

Mostly. I was looking for the Airplane scene where the passengers pull all of the guns out... I couldn't find a suitable picture.

30 posted on 02/20/2012 6:47:21 AM PST by Mycroft Holmes (<= Mash name for HTML Xampp PHP C JavaScript primer)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 25 | View Replies]

To: Lazamataz
Three burly terrorists rush the cockpit door and ....

When they open the door they see three "Ottos" sitting in the seats. A secret govt. program has retrofitted all planes with a decoy cockpit. The pilot, co-pilot and navigator are actually in a small compartment somewhere else on the plane.


31 posted on 02/20/2012 6:47:47 AM PST by raybbr (People who still support Obama are either a Marxist or a moron.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 23 | View Replies]

To: Lazamataz

32 posted on 02/20/2012 6:48:36 AM PST by driftdiver (I could eat it raw, but why do that when I have a fire.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 25 | View Replies]

To: Lazamataz

Newly installed technology will prevent them from reaching the cockpit before the end of the flight.

33 posted on 02/20/2012 6:50:24 AM PST by Tijeras_Slim
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 29 | View Replies]

To: raybbr
Three burly terrorists rush the cockpit door and ....

.... the pilot and co-pilot eject, leaving the passengers to their fate.

34 posted on 02/20/2012 6:53:58 AM PST by Lazamataz (If you only think about a diet, only your brain loses weight.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 31 | View Replies]

To: raybbr
Three burly terrorists rush the cockpit door and ....

.... they open it to find three-hundred Spartans, commanded by King Leonides.

With a cry of "AaaOOOO" they form into Phalanx Formation.

35 posted on 02/20/2012 6:57:24 AM PST by Lazamataz (If you only think about a diet, only your brain loses weight.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 31 | View Replies]

To: Lazamataz
Three burly terrorists rush the cockpit door and ....

They find the U.S. women's Olympic fencing team waiting to turn them back.... Oh, wait, they have a muslim on the team. Not sure how that would work out.

Olympic hopeful looks to make a symbolic mark 

36 posted on 02/20/2012 6:58:19 AM PST by raybbr (People who still support Obama are either a Marxist or a moron.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 28 | View Replies]

To: Lazamataz
Three burly terrorists rush the cockpit door and ....

they are cold cocked by the actresses who played "Charlie's Angels" who are on the way to LA for a 35th reunion show.

The plane breaks out in humming the Charlie's Angel theme song. One wag asks "Where's Charlie?"

Hilarity ensues.

37 posted on 02/20/2012 6:58:39 AM PST by exit82 (Democrats are the enemies of freedom. We have ideas-the Dems only have ideology.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 28 | View Replies]

To: exit82
Three burly terrorists rush the cockpit door and ....

..... a 16 ton weight drops on them.


38 posted on 02/20/2012 7:00:26 AM PST by Lazamataz (If you only think about a diet, only your brain loses weight.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 37 | View Replies]

To: driftdiver; MileHi

I lost the little dude again. Thank you for finding him for me.


39 posted on 02/20/2012 7:01:12 AM PST by Lazamataz (If you only think about a diet, only your brain loses weight.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 32 | View Replies]

To: Lazamataz

Three burly terrorists rush the cockpit door.....

Captain Oveur: You ever been in a cockpit before?
Three burly terrorists: No sir, we’ve never been up in a plane before.
Captain Oveur: You guys ever seen a grown man naked?


40 posted on 02/20/2012 7:09:04 AM PST by wyokostur
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 7 | View Replies]


Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first previous 1-2021-4041-53 next last

Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.

Free Republic
Browse · Search
Bloggers & Personal
Topics · Post Article

FreeRepublic, LLC, PO BOX 9771, FRESNO, CA 93794
FreeRepublic.com is powered by software copyright 2000-2008 John Robinson