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DUmmie FUnnies 11-22-12 (Nadin reports: WALMART WORKERS TO WALK OUT ON BLACK FRIDAY)
November 22, 2012 | DUmmie nadinbrzezinski, DUmmies, and Charles Henrickson

Posted on 11/22/2012 7:55:02 PM PST by Charles Henrickson

'Twas the night before Friday, when all through the DUmp,
Just one DUmmie was sniffing, she was getting a jump.
A story was breaking! 'Twas time to prepare--
Yes, Nadin Brzezinski soon would be there!

The DUmmies, all smug in their Bolshevik Red,
Were boring me stiff till I noticed this THREAD:
"On Friday, Black Friday," Nads exclaimed with a shout,
"The workers of Walmart all will walk out!"

Nadin, Girl Reporter, was posting this crap,
So I knew that a DUFU just fell in my lap.
You know she'll be there for a story this big
With press pass and notebook and good camera rig.

But not just reporter--she wears many a hat--
As activist too, she'll be there for that:
"On, Greeter! On, Checker! On, Stocker of Shelves!
On strike you must go! Show you're not happy elves!"

Of course, when Nadin posts a thread on DU,
Her fanboys, those bullies, will soon show up too.
But that makes for chuckles and iggy-list cheer,
And that's how Nadin won Top DUmmie last year.

So let us proceed, without further ado,
To hear from Nadin and the DUmmieland crew.
In Bolshevik Red there will rise such a racket,
While Henrickson's stuff you will see in a [bracket]:

WORKERS TO STAGE WALK OUTS AT WALMART STORES ON BLACK FRIDAY

[AND NADIN BRZEZINSKI WILL BE THERE!]

By Nadin Abbott

[Faster than a speeding trend. . . . More powerful than a Fukushima. . . . Able to cross the Rubicon in a single bound. . . . "Look, up in the sky!" "It's a journalist!" "It's an activist!" "It's SUPPERDUPERWOMAN!" . . . Yes, it's Supperduperwoman, strange visitor from . . . Poland, or Israel, or Mexico, or maybe a fallout shelter in San Diego . . . well, she's strange, we know that . . . who came to DUmmieland with powers and abilities far beyond those of normal DUmmies; and who, disguised as "Nadin Abbot," unpaid "reporter" for an insignificant online rag, fights a never-ending battle for . . . for . . . well, she fights a never-ending battle.]

November 20, 2012 (San Diego)—Across the nation and in San Diego County, Walmart workers are poised to stage a walk out on Friday, traditionally the biggest shopping day of the year.

[Poised, I tell you! All of them, all across the nation, poised! And Nadin is poised, too, ready to cover it all!]

This Thanksgiving, Walmart workers at more than 1,000 locations are seeking a seat at the bargaining table.

[And if they all sit down at the same time, the table reach a tipping point!]

“Unless Walmart takes immediate steps to improve basic working conditions, workers throughout the company's vast operations — from factories and warehouses to retail stores — will participate in a massive walkout on Friday, November 23," states an e-mail sent by Color of Change.

[Nadin's source, "Color of Change," is a race-hustling little organization that hasn't been able to accomplish very much in its brief history. So how "massive" the walkout will be remains to be seen. But Nadin makes it sound like this thing will bring Walmart to its knees!]

The reasons are many, but lifting workers out of poverty is a key factor.

[So walking out, and losing your job, and losing it to someone who WANTS to work at Walmart--this will lift you out of poverty??]

[nadinbrzezinski the DUmmie then posts a link to Nadin Abbott the reporter's article. Then she closes her OP by saying . . .]

Nothing more to say...

[Oh, Nadin, don't tease us! I'm sure you will have more to say! You always do. But first, let's get a reaction from your loyal readers . . .]

Wow. That would be MAJOR. A new dawn is upon us.

[I think someone is yanking Nadin's chain. You're lucky Nadin did not detect your sarcasm, pal, or you'd be on the iggy list for sure!]

I will be there, With camera, note pad, press credentials, recorder, and parking off the property. If this goes the way...it will be historic.

[If Nadin is there, it will be hysteric!]

Wouldn't that be a blast if that went across the nation.

[Wouldn't that be a bust if it didn't. Nadin responds . . .]

1000 locations is across the nation.

[A thousand points of light to no impact.]

By the time I leave to cover the strike special on aisle two, it will be well underway. If this goes the way it could, this will be historic. Yes, prepared for violence honestly.

[Nadin is bring her nunchucks. I don't know if you knew this, but Nadin is a master of martial arts. Or marital arts. Or something. Whatever it is, she's a master of it.]

Sadly, they will probably be fired.

[Which means that, laughably, Nadin's massive walkout story will likely be a a big bust, since most workers won't walk out.]

I will be up bright an early.

["Early," maybe, Nadin. But "bright," I'm not so sure.]

Their evil overlords will not tolerate this act of personhood.

[I, for one, welcome the Walmart overloads. High volume, low prices!]

this year I am doing Black Friday. The strike special on aisle two.

[Be careful not to get trampled by the crowds, Nadin. You're a small person to start with, and people might mistake you for Teddy Ruxpin or something.]

Even as a reporter, this is a concern.

[That people might mistake you for Teddy Ruxpin? I was thinking more like one of those troll dolls.]

Just in case, taking the zoom.

[It's a zoom out there, Nadin!]

They are right now at the NLBR to be exact. Wally World did not file the injunction on time. I need to furiously take some notes on that, for the Friday story and call corporate in the morning.

[Nadin Brzezinski is the hardest working girl reporter in show business!]

This afternoon, I stopped at Walmart on the way home from work. The cashiers all looked so scared and weary. I said, "How are you?" and my cashier said, "Fine." But it was so forced. I said, "Have a nice Thanksgiving!" and she said, "Okay. We'll all be here. Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday. All day. All three days." I told her, "Listen, people out there are learning about this. Public sentiment is starting to turn your way." She smiled for the first time, but then she had to rush into the next transaction. And her smile was so full of fear.

[She was probably afraid the guy behind you was going to haul off and slug you, DUmmie raging moderate, because you were holding up the line.]

I avoid Wally World. But have been covering a lo of labor stories. It's brewing, and not just Walmart.

[Nadin spots a trend.]

Some of us in the press will do the strike special, forgive me, educational picket, on Black Friday.

["Some of us in the press." Oh, Nadin! You crack me up!]

I'll have to see it to believe it.

[What? You don't believe it?? But, but, Nadin said it's going to be MASSIVE! 1000 locations! Historic! Just like that Occupy thingie! If Nadin said it, you can take it to the bank!]

For the record, I am not the only one to notice. . . .

[You mean there are OTHER reporters, trend-spotters even, who have seen this thing coming? I thought you were the only one. But if this is offically for the record, Nadin, I believe you.]

[Well, morning comes early on Black Friday, Nadin. Get some rest, drink plenty of fluids, and be there bright and--be there early, Nads. We're counting on you to keep us informed!]


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: dufu; dummie; dummiefunnies; dummies; nadinbrzezinski; walmart
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1 posted on 11/22/2012 7:55:16 PM PST by Charles Henrickson
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To: Charles Henrickson

“We’re trying to change the world” my azz!


2 posted on 11/22/2012 7:57:08 PM PST by rockrr (Everything is different now...)
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To: PJ-Comix; Xenalyte; RMDupree; AlexW; CzarNicky; Mike Fieschko; motzman; codercpc; thingumbob; ...

PING!


3 posted on 11/22/2012 7:57:44 PM PST by Charles Henrickson (The wag tailoring the doggerel)
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To: PJ-Comix; Xenalyte; RMDupree; AlexW; CzarNicky; Mike Fieschko; motzman; codercpc; thingumbob; ...

PING!


4 posted on 11/22/2012 7:58:41 PM PST by Charles Henrickson (The wag tailoring the doggerel)
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To: Charles Henrickson; Revolting cat!
I will be there, With camera, note pad, press credentials


5 posted on 11/22/2012 8:00:32 PM PST by a fool in paradise (America 2013 - STUCK ON STUPID)
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To: PJ-Comix; All
I DON'T have a link to the DUmmie FUnnies blogspot, because SOMEBODY {**ahem, PJ**} changed the password to get in and didn't bother to tell me!
6 posted on 11/22/2012 8:01:25 PM PST by Charles Henrickson (The wag tailoring the doggerel)
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To: rockrr

Question authority. Question the self-appointed authority of Marxists who speak of CHANGE and REVOLUTION.


7 posted on 11/22/2012 8:01:51 PM PST by a fool in paradise (America 2013 - STUCK ON STUPID)
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To: Charles Henrickson
This afternoon, I stopped at Walmart on the way home from work. The cashiers all looked so scared and weary. I said, "How are you?" and my cashier said, "Fine." But it was so forced. I said, "Have a nice Thanksgiving!" and she said, "Okay. We'll all be here. Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday. All day. All three days." I told her, "Listen, people out there are learning about this. Public sentiment is starting to turn your way." She smiled for the first time, but then she had to rush into the next transaction. And her smile was so full of fear.

Too funny! This "reporter" imposed her fantasy on this cashier, who was probably thinking "Why is this #$#(& staring at me like that?" and then smiled at her so as not to upset the wild-eyed moonbat!
8 posted on 11/22/2012 8:04:36 PM PST by LostInBayport (When there are more people riding in the cart than there are pulling it, the cart stops moving...)
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To: Charles Henrickson

I’m sure not shopping there tomorrow! Mostly because I hate crowds. And I don’t need anything.


9 posted on 11/22/2012 8:04:36 PM PST by samiam1972 ("It is a poverty to decide that a child must die so that you may live as you wish."-Mother Teresa)
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To: rockrr

One more reason for companies to look at more tasks robots can do.


10 posted on 11/22/2012 8:05:44 PM PST by Hillarys Gate Cult (Liberals make unrealistic demands on reality and reality doesn't oblige them.)
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To: LostInBayport

Actually, I’ll wager that the self-indulged idiot never set foot in a Walmart that day. While I am far from perfect, I thank God that I don’t suffer from delusions of granduer like that “reporter”. The sad thing is that, deep down inside, she knows that she’s a pathetic example of a human being and fits the definition of small failure rather well.


11 posted on 11/22/2012 8:14:17 PM PST by edh (I need a better tagline)
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To: Charles Henrickson
Try as you might, Charles, you CANNOT destroy my Nadin fantasy!


12 posted on 11/22/2012 8:21:11 PM PST by bigbob
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To: Charles Henrickson
[nadinbrzezinski the DUmmie then posts a link to Nadin Abbott the reporter's article. Then she closes her OP by saying . . .]

Nothing more to say...

I didn't know DUmmieland has blog pimps, too!

13 posted on 11/22/2012 8:22:46 PM PST by Cyber Liberty (Obama considers the Third World morally superior to the United States.)
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To: Charles Henrickson

We’re gonna need more popcorn! :)


14 posted on 11/22/2012 8:27:05 PM PST by luvie (All my heroes wear camos!)
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To: bigbob
Try as you might, Charles, you CANNOT destroy my Nadin fantasy!

I have seen photographs of the real Nadin. Let me just say that she looks more like A) than B).

A): B):

15 posted on 11/22/2012 8:33:30 PM PST by Charles Henrickson (The wag tailoring the doggerel)
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To: franksolich; Ballygrl; gardencatz; PJ-Comix
Well, here we go again. Nominations have just opened for DUmmie of the Year (DOTY) for 2012. Nadin is the defending champ, and lately, it seems, she is making her annual late-season push.

But I don't know. I think Nads had a stronger year last year, and definitely--unquestionably--deserved the DOTY. This year, in my mind, no one stands out that clearly.

16 posted on 11/22/2012 8:38:02 PM PST by Charles Henrickson (The wag tailoring the doggerel)
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To: Charles Henrickson

I’m going as Galt as possible for the next 4 yrs.


17 posted on 11/22/2012 8:47:33 PM PST by bicyclerepair ( >-> Zombies eat brains. >-> 50% of FL is safe.)
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To: Charles Henrickson

Did you know Nadin actually lists here employer as Occupy San Diego? LOL. Employed by Occupy.
https://www.facebook.com/nadin.brzezinski


18 posted on 11/22/2012 8:55:12 PM PST by mnehring
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To: bigbob

Quick way to destroy it, photos here:
https://www.facebook.com/nadin.brzezinski


19 posted on 11/22/2012 8:58:58 PM PST by mnehring
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To: Charles Henrickson
click:

20 posted on 11/22/2012 9:08:32 PM PST by mnehring
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