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They're whistling past the graveyard, trying to maintain a cheerful countenance in the face of imminent disaster. The handwriting is on the wall, but they don't want to read it. In other words, the DUmmies are in denial. All the signs point to major midterm losses for the Democrats tomorrow--including the loss of the U.S. Senate--but the DUmmies don't want to admit it. That's the state of mind in DUmmieland on the eve of Election Day, as seen in several threads, including this THREAD, "What's with all the GLOOM and DOOM threads?" So let us now journey to the...

The Beaver is BACK! Li'l Beaver, that is. Yes, that lovable, cigar-chomping mascot of the DUmmie FUnnies is here to tell you: The DUFUs are back in business! After some months of on-and-off-again editions, DUmmie FUnnies founder PJ-Comix and affable co-host Charles Henrickson (yours truly) have decided to give it another go, just in time for the midterm election season. As you'll recall, here at DUmmie FUnnies we take an entertaining look at the Looney Left, particularly at the postings found at Democratic Underground, the home of those wacky moonbats affectionately known as the DUmmies. PJ kicked things off...

Just as it's embarrassing now for the DUmmies to use the term "Obamacare," and so now they just call it the "ACA," so also has it become embarrassing to say "global warming." Since the globe isn't all that warm these days, now the preferred term is "climate change." That can cover just about anything. And that way the facts can't get in the way of their global whining. Witness this THREAD by DUmmie kentuck, "If you believe in global climate change, do you believe the earth is getting warmer or colder?" But before we get to that thread, let's...

New Year's Eve for William Rivers Pitt is like All You Can Eat Night at Golden Corral for Michael Moore: Just another night. Nothing special. You see, Pitt is known to bend the old elbow to all hours of the day and night in honor of, well, just about anything. The sun coming up in the morning. An overtime loss by the Boston Bruins. (Hey, it's one point.) Whatever. Any excuse will do. But on New Year's Eve, when all the amateurs get in on the act, William will use the occasion to raise many a glass, in honor...

http://www.democraticunderground.com/10024245263 The Battle of the Sexes has been raging lately in DUmmieland. The angry DUmmie women (is there any other kind?) have been accusing the men--all men--of being sexist and misogynist and potential rapists. Some of the DUmmie men have dared to defend themselves, but in vain. Political correctness must win out, at all costs. Well, guess who feels left out? The LSMFT community, i.e., the Lezbo Sodomite Masochist Fag Transangered community. There must be Fifty Shades of Gay, and they all want to have their say. You see, in DUmmieland, to be fair, the Battle of the Sexes must...

The Battle of the Sexes has been raging lately in DUmmieland. The angry DUmmie women (is there any other kind?) have been accusing the men--all men--of being sexist and misogynist and potential rapists. Some of the DUmmie men have dared to defend themselves, but in vain. Political correctness must win out, at all costs. Well, guess who feels left out? The LSMFT community, i.e., the Lezbo Sodomite Masochist Fag Transangered community. There must be Fifty Shades of Gay, and they all want to have their say. You see, in DUmmieland, to be fair, the Battle of the Sexes must...

The DUmmies must have been naughty this year. It seems all Santa brought them was a lump of coal. Or so you would think, listening to the way they whine. Of course the DUmmies would probably want to bring Santa up on charges if he brought them a lump of coal, since coal is such an evil Republican rock. The DUmmies talk about their Christmas presents here in this THREAD by DUmmie Locut0s, "What did you get for Christmas?" DUmmie Locut0s, affectionately known to us as LocoNuts, is the chubby self-pitying loser (that's "looser," for you DUmmies) who never...

OFA, Organizing For Action--née Obama For America, the neverending barackobama.com campaign operation--OFA, trying to promote their Mutual of Obama health insurance disaster, recently launched a series of ads to get mind-numbed Obamabots to talk up the program over the holidays. The ad that has gained the most attention is the one pictured above. It depicts a scrawny youngish person of indeterminate gender, wearing hipster glasses, cradling a cup of cocoa in a non-masculine manner, and wearing a plaid onesie. The accompanying message reads: Wear pajamas. Drink hot chocolate. Talk about getting health insurance. _________________ #GetTalking barackobama.com/talk Well, this ad...

In our last DUFU, we heard from Will the Shill Pitt how wonderful and easy signing up for ObamaCare is--even though he hadn't, uh, exactly completed the process. Well, today's DUFU will tell a different tale, i.e., "Tales from the Whipped: ObamaCare Sign-up Nightmares." We visit this THREAD by DUmmie Demo_Chris, "9 HOURS in and Healthcare.gov still wont let me look at the actual PLANS." Fortunately it won't take us 9 hours to look at the actual comments of the DUmmies, in Bolshevik Red, while the commentary of your humble guest correspondent, Charles Henrickson, wondering if William Rivers Pitt...

It's that time of year again. Every year at DUmmie FUnnies we check in with the DUmmies to see how their Thanksgiving went. Usually it consists of a) non-traditional weirdness, b) confrontations with conservative relatives, c) conversions of conservative relatives, or d) all of the above. Let's see how it went this year. We begin with this THREAD, "How will you spend Thanksgiving?" and move on to others. So let us now go and spend Thanksgiving with the DUmmies, in Bolshevik Red, while the commentary of your humble guest correspondent, Charles Henrickson--who did the odd thing and actually went...

Will the Shill Pitt, loyal party hack, suddenly has become Will the Shrill Pitt, and boy, is he hacked off! What has got the normally mild-mannered journalist in such a state of upset? Is it a George W. Bush speaking tour? No. Is it finding out the news that Karl Rove was NOT indicted after all? No. Besides, the 24 business hours are not up yet. No, what has got Pitt's panties in a bunch is . . . how badly Team Obama has screwed up this whole health care thing. Pitt is peeved! Witness this THREAD, "God damn...

"If you like your health care plan, you will be able to keep your health care plan. Period. No one will take it away. No matter what." --Dr. Ob, June 15, 2009 The impact of Obamacare is starting to hit the DUmmies. And not all of them are pleased. Employers are canceling health insurance for their workers. People are having to pay higher premiums. People are having to meet higher deductibles. And this is not going over well with all the denizens of the DUmp. My gosh, who could have predicted that these things would be happening???? Who could have...

It's a familiar strategy: Ultra-leftist candidate enters race, regardless of whether he or she has any chance of winning. Candidate's extreme left-wing posturing gets DUmmies all aroused. Candidate fleeces DUmmies for lots of money. Candidate loses, but has vastly increased his or her bank account. Lather. Rinse. Repeat. Call it the Alan Grayson Method. The DUmmies' Darling DU Jour is one Wendy Davis, a state senator in Texas who has just thrown her tennis shoes into the ring for governor. Ms. Davis catapulted to fame in June, when she filibustered a bill regulating abortions by standing for eleven hours...

"And you shall set limits for the people all around, saying, 'Take care not to go up into the mountain or touch the edge of it. Whoever touches the mountain shall be put to death.'" (Exodus 19:12) Mount Rushmore has become Mount Sinai. Lord Obama has declared it. Even though the partial "government shutdown" affects only a small percentage of federal spending, and the Chief Executive has the discretion to manage and adjust and prioritize accordingly, the Offended One is determined to make the "shutown" as visible and as miserable as possible, so that he can blame the eeevil...

Bush, Cheney, and Rummy: war criminals, and they remain free. Bradley Manning: whistle-blower, and he gets sentenced to 35 years in prison. Where is the justice? Justice for Treyson! This sums up the DUmmies' reaction to the sentencing of Nothing-Is-Private Manning. But that was yesterday. Today comes news that Bradley--who at one time had called himself "Brianna"--now wants to be known as "Chelsea" and live as a woman. Bradley is no longer manning. Multiple threads the last couple of days, too many to link to them all. We'll start with this THREAD, "Bradley Manning sentanced to 35 years." But...

Time to catch up with our old friend, Know-it-all Nadin Brzezinski (seen above, in action as interpid girl reporter Nadin Abbott, sniffing out yet another story). In today's episode, Nadin pundificates on the state of DUmmieland, here in this THREAD, "Yup...the schism on DU is deepening." This is an occasion, of course--as in all Nadin threads--for the all-knowing, condescending one to make herself look superior and sagacious. And then, when there's some blowback--or even anticipating it--she takes on the martyr persona, suffering nobly under the bullies. It's like Nadin has a permanent "Kick me!" sign taped to her back....

Now that President Obama is well into his Lame Duck Dynasty, the question arises: What will be the Obama Legacy? A vibrant economy? Universal health care for all? World peace? Racial healing? Lower ocean levels? It's so hard to pick just one. The increasingly disenchanted DUmmies, though, might pick "None of the above." That's the gist of this THREAD by DUmmie Kablooie, "Wow. With all these NSA revelations rolling in Obama's legacy may not be Obamacare." So let us now watch the DUmmies discuss the Obama Legacy, in Bolshevik Red, while the commentary of your humble guest correspondent, Charles...

The DUmmies continue to reel from the real effects of Obamacare, as it begins to unfold. The latest news is that the national clothing-store chain Forever 21 is moving many of their employees from full-time to part-time status, so the company doesn't have to suffer the punitive costs of Obamacare. Hey, DUmmies, OWN IT! This is what you voted for. Own it. But no, instead of owning it, the DUmmies are frowning it. They're mad at Forever 21 for trying to keep their business in business. Why, in fact, this calls for a BOYCOTT!! The DUmmies are going to...

If you oppose President Obama, if you don't like him, you MUST be a RACIST! You're criticizing him because, as a racist Rethuglican, you can't STAND having a black man in the White House! Unless of course you're a DUmmie. Then you have free rein to criticize Obama all you want, because, as a progressive, ipso facto, you CANNOT be a racist, and you're only criticizing him because he's let us down by not being progressive enough. That's about the size of things in DUmmieland. And the DUmmies are too dense to see their DUbble standard--as we'll see demonstrated...

The man you are looking at is William Rivers Pitt, the erstwhile Wunderkind of DUmmieland, "Pied Piper Pitt," now a 41-year-old has-been/never-was journopundactivist and self-important muckety-muck for an obscure prog blog called "truthout." Ever since Journalist Pitt swore to the high heavens that an indictment of Karl Rove was a done deal, sealed, and would be revealed within 24 business hours, Mr. Pitt has been the laughingstock of the internets. OK, you can stop looking at the picture now and go fetch some eyebleach. BTW, that's a screenshot of the Pittster youtubing for dollars for his little truthout site....