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Possibly the best W. C. Fields skit ever.....The Fatal Glass of Beer
maggiesfarm ^

Posted on 02/08/2013 5:21:40 PM PST by virgil283

"A good skit for a snow day :..... "'Tain't a fit night out for man nor beast.".... Also, "Maw, I'm going out to milk the elk."....Also, "He was mighty good with mustard..... he broke her tambourine"....[video 15m.]

....sing me that song


TOPICS: TV/Movies; Weird Stuff
KEYWORDS: wcfields
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To: AlexW

Madam, there’s no such thing as a tough child - if you parboil them first for seven hours, they always come out tender.~ W. C . Fields


21 posted on 02/08/2013 6:06:45 PM PST by BerryDingle (I know how to deal with communists, I still wear their scars on my back from Hollywood-Ronald Reagan)
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To: greene66

On one of my recent trips through Afghanistan, we lost our corkscrew. Were forced to live on food and water for several days.


22 posted on 02/08/2013 6:08:00 PM PST by ShasheMac
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To: virgil283

I’ve been a fan of Fields since I was a kid. I don’t remember the movie, but my favorite scene was when he sold the talking dog in a bar


23 posted on 02/08/2013 6:09:00 PM PST by Figment
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To: virgil283

I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.


24 posted on 02/08/2013 6:11:35 PM PST by razorback-bert (I'm in shape. Round is a shape isn't it?)
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To: virgil283
A great scene from the movie "International House": Professor Quail (W.C. Fields) has just landed in the city of Wu-Hu, China. However, he is unsure of where he landed, so he asks a group of people standing nearby to tell him where he is:

Professor Quail: Hey! Where am I?

Woman: Wu-Hu.

Professor Quail: Woo-Hoo to you sweetheart. Hey Charlie, where am I?

Hotel Manager: WU-HU!

(Fields then removes the flower from his lapel)

Professor Quail: Don't let the posey fool you!

25 posted on 02/08/2013 6:17:11 PM PST by GreenHornet
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To: virgil283

Thanks for posting. I’d never seen that before. It was hilarious!


26 posted on 02/08/2013 6:38:33 PM PST by rabidralph (http://www.cafepress.com/westernwis)
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To: virgil283

Them elks was caribooses. You know, like at the back of a train.


27 posted on 02/08/2013 6:53:04 PM PST by blueunicorn6 ("A crack shot and a good dancer")
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To: virgil283

Reporter- Mr Fields, what would your father say if he knew you drank a 5th of scotch a day?”

Fields: “What would he say about my drinking a 5th a day? Why, he’d call me a sissaaaay!”


28 posted on 02/08/2013 7:47:47 PM PST by llevrok (Unlike Obama, at least Nero could play a fiddle.)
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To: virgil283

True story -

Fields and some friends were hanging out at his Hollywood home one Sunday, playing cards and having a “few drinks”.

That Sunday, news came of the Japanese attack on Pearl Harbor. Fields immediatly got on the phone and ordered virtually a truck load of booze from his supplier, knowing it might be hard to come by once America got into the war.

One of the house guests teased Bill by asking “Why’d you order so little?”

Fields replied “It’s going to be a very short war!”


29 posted on 02/08/2013 7:53:58 PM PST by llevrok (Unlike Obama, at least Nero could play a fiddle.)
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To: virgil283

The very funniest of all of those ancient movie scenes was a thing called Fatty Arbuckle and the Rubber Fish.


30 posted on 02/08/2013 7:56:43 PM PST by varmintman
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To: GreenHornet

In my younger days, I’ve asked many a girl in a bar to play squidjulum.
Never had any takers, for some reason.


31 posted on 02/08/2013 7:57:23 PM PST by llevrok (Unlike Obama, at least Nero could play a fiddle.)
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To: dynachrome

***“International House” (with Fields, Burns and Allen, Bela Lugosi!!)****

Fields lands in his gyro-helocopter in Who Hoo China. He had a flower in his lapel, and asks ...”Can anyone tell me where I am?”

Woman “Woo Hoo.”

Fields: “And Woohoo to you my dear! Now, can anyone tell mo where I am?”

Hotel manager: “Woohoo”.

Fields: (not happy, grabs the flower in his lapel and crushes it): “Don’t let the daisy fool you my friend!”


32 posted on 02/08/2013 8:32:09 PM PST by Ruy Dias de Bivar (Click my name! See new paintings!)
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To: GreenHornet

Dang! Beat me to it!


33 posted on 02/08/2013 8:35:26 PM PST by Ruy Dias de Bivar (Click my name! See new paintings!)
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To: ShasheMac

Actually, I thought it was parboiled.

Only if they are properly cooked.


34 posted on 02/08/2013 8:39:38 PM PST by Joe Bfstplk
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To: greene66

I’m looking for Karl La Fong.


35 posted on 02/08/2013 8:43:51 PM PST by DManA
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To: greene66

Man” “Do you know ‘’Carl La Fong?’’ “Capital “L small a , capital F small ‘’o’’, small ‘’n’’ small ‘’g’’. La Fong, Carl La Fong’’. Fields “No I don’t know Carl La Fong, capital L small a , capitial F’ small o, small ‘’n’’, small g’’. And if I did know Carl La Fong I wouldn’t admit it!’’.


36 posted on 02/09/2013 1:31:14 AM PST by jmacusa (Political correctness is cultural Marxism. I'm not a Marxist.)
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To: PapaNew

It’s “Don’t you like children?’’. “I love children. When their properly cooked’’.


37 posted on 02/09/2013 1:33:34 AM PST by jmacusa (Political correctness is cultural Marxism. I'm not a Marxist.)
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To: virgil283
"During one of my treks through Afghanistan, we lost our corkscrew. We were compelled to live on food and water for several days."

* * * *

Fields: D'ja ever play the game of sjquidlum?

Pretty Girl: No. The only game I ever played was beanbag.

Fields: Beanbag? Ah, very good; it becomes very exciting at times. I saw the championship played in Paris. Many people were killed.

38 posted on 02/09/2013 4:19:25 AM PST by Scoutmaster (I've fixed my problem with procrastination; just wait and see.)
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To: virgil283

for several years Groucho Marx gave a speech at UCLA school of film.
He spoke of his old friend Bill Fields inviting him to his new home in the San Fernando Valley which was mostly citrus trees at the time.
Wehen I got there Groucho said Bill greeted me at the door and told me to follow him and we went up to the attic which was filled with cases of scotch.
Bill I asked, what’s all this?
In case of prohabition bill shot back.
Groucho, but Bill, prohabition ended years ago.
Yeah I know but I can’t take a chance of it coming back.


39 posted on 02/09/2013 4:53:05 AM PST by Joe Boucher ((FUBO))
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To: hinckley buzzard

He did have scenes with Baby Leroy in “It’s A Gift” including one memorable scene were he kicked the kid in the slats. He also claimed he put gin in Baby Leroy’s milk bottle to stop him from crying and ruining scenes.


40 posted on 02/09/2013 5:08:17 AM PST by driftless2
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