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Kerry Complains Released Terrorist "Broke His Word" [semi-satire]
Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 28 Feb 2016 | John Semmens

Posted on 02/27/2016 9:08:00 AM PST by John Semmens

News reports that former Gitmo detainee Ibrahim al Qosi has rejoined al Qaeda has Secretary of State John Kerry in a snit. "We had an agreement with him that he was not supposed to do that," Kerry complained.

Kerry's remarks in testimony before the State, Foreign Operations, and Related Programs Subcommittee of the Senate Appropriations Committee left no doubt that he was mightily peeved. "We go to great care in drafting the papers detainees must sign before we let them out of prison," Kerry said. "Contractually, I think these signed agreements are airtight. I believe we will have a strong case for a breach-of-contract lawsuit against this man."

"You know, part of the problem may have been that he was released to Somalia," Kerry observed. "If it weren't for Congressional opposition we could have released him in the United States as President Obama wanted to do. So, in a way, Congress is just as much at fault for al Qosi's return to terrorist activities as anyone."

The Secretary used this incident as an opening argument for the President's proposal to close the Gitmo facility and bring any remaining detainees to the United States. "This US military prison on the Island of Cuba is an impediment to improving relations with the Castro Government," Kerry lamented. "Shutting it down and ceding the land back to Cuba would be a major step for our country in atonement for the damage we have done to the Cuban Government over the last 50 years. The President has graciously given Congress the opportunity to participate in this historic rapprochement. I urge them to grasp this opportunity or risk missing the boat if he has to go it alone."

if you missed any of this week's other semi-news/semi-satire posts you can find them at...

http://www.gopbriefingroom.com/index.php?topic=196502.0


TOPICS: Government; History; Military/Veterans; Politics
KEYWORDS: jihad; kerry; satire; terrorists

1 posted on 02/27/2016 9:08:01 AM PST by John Semmens
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To: John Semmens

The trouble with this is that I can’t tell which is which.


2 posted on 02/27/2016 9:11:39 AM PST by Izzy Dunne (Hello, I'm a TAGLINE virus. Please help me spread by copying me into YOUR tag line.)
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To: John Semmens

Kerry is such a whiner and can’t discern the truth.


3 posted on 02/27/2016 9:33:41 AM PST by mountainlion (Live well for those that did not make it back.)
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To: John Semmens

What an idiot to think they would be held by a contract.


4 posted on 02/27/2016 10:40:40 AM PST by chit*chat
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