Posted on 10/27/2023 3:44:44 PM PDT by DFG
CAMBRIDGE, MA — Notorious Hamas leader Ismail Haniyeh will soon be relocating to the U.S. as a Senior Fellow at Harvard University in the field of international relations.
"We are honored to welcome such an austere scholar to these hallowed halls," said Harvard Dean Rakesh Khurana. "Mr. Haniyeh brings with him a wealth of knowledge and experience in diplomacy, public relations, and terrorizing innocent Jews — all things we prize highly here at Harvard. We know his valuable and unique perspective will expand the young minds who come here to learn."
Sources say the position will add to the diversity of the staff and provide Haniyeh with a salary of $780,000 per year.
"Inshallah, I hope to remain in this position for years to come, molding young minds to seek the glory of martyrdom as they spill the blood of the Jews," said Haniyeh. "Death to Israel and death to America. Allahu Akbar."
At publishing time, the Dean had politely asked Haniyeh to please stop throwing rocks at Jews in the quad.
Flat spin, downward trajectory.
From the hard left, hard liberal, hard Progressive, east coast elite Ivy league universities, not satire.
Got me for five seconds. I totally believed the headline.
Caught me again. I thought this was real for a while.
Try this in Texas.
Me too.
I burst out laughing when I read the headline.
> Got me for five seconds. I totally believed the headline. <
Me too. And I’m very disappointed that it wasn’t real. After all, a Hamas leader teaching at Harvard would be out in the open.
Easy for the Mossad to pay him a little visit.
Yeah, me too. And I wasn't shocked, it was quite believable...
Expand their minds so far that their brains fall out.
I’m surprised they haven’t dropped the term “fellow” in favor of some gender-neutral term like “zellow”.
OK, it got me.
Love the Bee.
Diversity promotion, uh? Racketeering and abuse of language to help and abet enemies.
They sound like a bimbo who says she is free to embrace slavery if she wants to
The Bee’s motto should be: “Satire today. Reality tomorrow.”
i can no longer tell Bee headlines from real ones ... i thought this one was real, and an earlier headline i had assumed to be a Bee one was real ...
Notice Babylon Bee writers have to race to get their items on the internet before surrounding articles make them history pieces?
That is so pathetically true.
The Bee should cease being their think tank.
Its a shame that the headline seemed legit considering everything
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.