***OFFICIAL FRIDAY SILLINESS THREAD***

TheBigB

[TheBigB]

Yabba-dabba doo and woo hoo hoooo! :) It's FRIDAAAAAAYYYYYYYYY! Silliness abounds here in the OFST! Work? Forget about it! :) Come in and have fun! As always, feel free to post jokes, cartoons, silly facts, nonsensical statements, or even to IGNORE THIS THREAD!

Fierce Allegiance poses ---->

"Logic indicates incoming silliness, Captain."

"Mmkay, who ordered the girl with extra pepperoni?"

[r-q-tek86]

We had our annual Connecticut Roadbuilders Outing & Golf tournament yesterday

How'd you play?

[TheBigB]

[Jersey Republican Biker Chick]

The word for the day is LEGS, now go out and spread the word!!!!

[BJClinton]

It's new to me so I'm posting it here: Che-Mart







Other funny stuff there, check it out.

[Zeppelin]

[Darksheare]

Ph34r th3 7366z0rz!
(Fear the legs.)

[scott7278]

The early days of Free Republic:

 

[theDentist]

I wonder if closeted homosexuals dread going to company Outings?

[BJClinton]

Click the pic:

[TheBigB]

Monsters have bad days, too...

[SilentServiceCPOWife]

Those are great. :-)

[Jersey Republican Biker Chick]

He's new and young, I am sure he meant no harm. One cheesecake shot is not going to start a war as far as I am concerned. I am not one to be offended either way!

That being said, SERIOUSNESS OVER.....GO TO SILLINESS MODE!!!!

[Fierce Allegiance]

The body damage on the carts wasn't too extensive, and think they managed to get all the algae out of the engine. The insurance said they will cover the repairs to the bridge. My bag is now lighter to carry since I don't have my driver or 7-iron in it anymore.

If you don't count penalties, I was under a hundred.

[JimWforBush]

My wife, who is blonde, came running up to me in the driveway, the other day, just jumping for joy! I didn't know why she was jumping for joy but I thought, what the heck and I starting jumping up and down along with her.

When she said, "Honey, I have some really great news for you!"
I said "Great. Tell me what you're so happy about."
She stopped jumping and was breathing heavily from all the jumping up and down, when she told me that she was pregnant! I was ecstatic! We had been trying for a while, so I grabbed her and kissed her on the lips and told her, "That's great! I couldn't be happier!"
Then, she said "Oh, honey, There's more."
I asked, "What do you mean 'more'?"
She said, "Well, we are not having just one baby. We are going to have TWINS!"
Amazed at how she could know so soon after getting pregnant, I asked her how she knew.
She said, (You're going to love this!) "Well, that was the easy part. I went to Wal-Mart and bought the twin-pack home pregnancy test kit and both tests came out positive!"

[BJClinton]

Massive Wedgie

[Jersey Republican Biker Chick]

"(Fear the legs.)"

I fear nothing. Legs are fun!

[Fierce Allegiance]

I hate it when my TV tells me to take off all my clothes.

[r-q-tek86]

An adaptation of "A Few Good Men"...

CAST:

MEP Engineer: Jack Nicholson

Architect: Tom Cruise


MEP Engineer: You want answers?

Architect: I think I'm entitled to them.

MEP Engineer: You want answers?!

Architect: I want the truth!

MEP Engineer: You can't HANDLE the truth!!

Son, we live in a world that has CHILLERS, BOILERS AND SWITCHGEAR. And those PIECES OF EQUIPMENT have to be LOCATED IN ROOMS. Who's gonna DESIGN THEM? You? You, MR. ARCHITECT? I have a greater responsibility than you can possibly fathom.

You weep for LOST PARKING SPACES and you curse the SIZE OF MY GENERATOR. You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know: that THOSE MEP SYSTEMS, while tragic, probably saved lives. And my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, saves lives...You don't want the truth. Because deep down, in places you don't talk about at parties, you WANT me on that DESIGN TEAM. You NEED me on that DESIGN TEAM. We use words like DESIGN, CODE, ANALYSIS...we use these words as the backbone to a life spent PROVIDING OWNER COMFORT AND ENERGY EFFICIENCY. You use 'em as a punchline.

I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain my DESIGN to a man who rises and sleeps under the blanket of the very ENVIRONMENT I provide, then questions the manner in which I provide it! I'd rather you just said thank you and went on your way. Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a DUCTULATOR and DESIGN a BUILDING SYSTEM. Either way, I don't give a damn what you think you're entitled to!

Architect : Did you OVERSIZE THE MECHANICAL AND ELECTRICAL ROOMS?

MEP Engineer : (quietly) I did the job you HIRED me to do.

Architect : Did you OVERSIZE THE MECHANICAL AND ELECTRICAL ROOMS?!!

MEP Engineer : You're g-ddamn right I did!!

[JimWforBush]

1. Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love, and got married. ?The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent. 2. A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I'll serve you, but don't start anything." 3. Two peanuts walk into a bar, and one was a salted. 4. A dyslexic man walks into a bra. 5. A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm and says: "A beer please, and one for the road." 6. Two cannibals are eating a clown. ?One says to the other: "Does this taste funny to you?"

7. "Doc, I can't stop singing 'The Green, Green Grass of Home.'"? "That sounds like Tom Jones Syndrome."? "Is it common?" "Well, It's Not Unusual." 8. Two cows are standing next to each other in a field. Daisy says to Dolly, "I was artificially inseminated this morning." "I don't believe you," says Dolly. "It's true, no bull!" exclaims Daisy. 9. An invisible man marries an invisible woman.??The kids were nothing to look at either. 10. Deja Moo: The feeling that you've heard this bull before. 11. I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn't find any. 12. A man woke up in a hospital after a serious accident. He shouted, "Doctor, doctor, I can't feel my legs!"??The doctor replied, "I know you can't - I've cut off your arms!" 13. I went to a seafood disco last week...and pulled a mussel. 14. What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh. 15. Two fish swim into a concrete wall. The one turns to the other and says "Dam!". 16. Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a fire in the craft. ?Unsurprisingly it sank, proving once again that you can't have your kayak and heat it too. 17. A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories.??After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse.? "But why," they asked, as they moved off. "Because", he said, "I can't stand chess-nuts boasting in an open foyer." 18. A woman has twins and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named "Ahmal."??The other goes to a family in Spain; they name him "Juan." Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his birth mother. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wishes she also had a picture of Ahmal. Her husband responds, "They're twins! If you've seen Juan, you've seen Ahmal." 19. Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him ...??A super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis. 20. And finally, there was the person who sent twenty different puns to his friends, with the hope that at least ten of the puns would make them laugh.? No pun in ten did.

[Dashing Dasher]

PUT ME BACK IN THE PING LIST!!!!

Please!?