Posted on 07/29/2006 5:51:24 PM PDT by 5Madman2
Originally Posted by Troll in Myspace.com forum:
Good. Anything tactical is better than something non-tactical. I personally wear some some 5.11 underwear in tactical black (hides the stains better from the taco runoff). Its hard to find size 56 underwear but I find that if I use some tactical thread and needles I can stitch 2 pairs of underwear together. Yes 5.11 will make anything you want and they will tacticalize it for you.
I realize that some of you dont understand me but with my more than 10 but less than 20 hours of CCW training I may come across as a little bit of a know it all and I apologize for that. But I am prepared for any occasion and I feel this is what truly seperates a sheepdog like me from the sheeple.
I know that they could never understand the responsibilities we as CCWers have but this is the cross we bear. For example, last night I was in my lazyboy eating my nightly gallon of Cookie Dough ice cream when I looked out the window and I saw something suspicious.
A man was walking his dog down the street. He looked at my house when the porch lights were on. I knew he was waiting to commit a home invasion and I threw on my tactical pants, vest, and hat. (The hat can conceal an extra Glock 27 if I need it to). I then grabbed my ice cream tub and spoon. I was going to wait on the roof and see if I could get the drop on him. My neighbors are used to me doing this. They look out the window and see me with a Glock in each hand, a 5.11 balaclava, and my black 5.11 BDUs. I was perched on my roof for 6 hours. It was hot, I had eaten 2 gallons of Cookie Dough ice cream, and had not had my nightly snack yet. Then it happened.
A car drove down the street and the bass was turned up, WAY UP!!! They were listening to rap music!!! Gangbanger thug urban youth democrats!!! My condition went from yellow to Tactical Red/Black/Green (it was almost a tactical rainbow but not like a gay rainbow, remember I vote Republican and I am proud of it!) and I went as low as my 56 inch waist would allow me to get. I then did a tactical roll right off the roof into my landscaping. I wanted to get a better line of sight on the street and see if this scum turned around. Sure enough they let the high school kid out at the last house on the street. It was a ploy.
My mind was racing...
How did they get past the security guards at the gate? Did they know that a CCWer was living in this 'hood? Were they armed with rifles strong enough to pierce the plates I had in my 5.11 vest? Was I going to fart or **** myself from all the dairy I had eaten? Would they suspect it was from fear and not the fact I had eaten a few gallons of cookie dough ice cream? Will a Klinton become the next president?...
Then they drove by and proceeded down the street. Once they turned off my street I figured I had probably scared them off.
I waited in my bushes for another 4 hours. Then I saw the dog walker again... I knew he was scouting my house because he looked at it and shook his head. Would he make it past the barbed wire, the bars on the windows, the 4 tactical German Shepherd police dogs I had purchased from my tactical supplier? Would he have the knowledge and tactics to beat those of a CCWer?
I retreated into the safety of my house and grabbed a new cell phone. They may have cloned this one. I also put 2 boxes of pizza rolls into the oven and covered the door with my Glocks while they cooked.
I knew I was in for a long day as I realized that today was the little league championships. The ball field they were going to be playing at was a few blocks up the street. Lots of cars and potential terrorists could be out scouting my neighborhood.
Sorry to leave my post but I smell some microwave burritos...
He's back
You may appreciate the humor
That is really good stuff, and more accurate than even you realize. Or maybe you DO realize! LOL
Reminds me of my neighbors in New Mexico.
Hey now!
I do realize-
We have many Tacticool types around here
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