BAT BOY SHOCKER:
'I AM MAC'S LOVE CHILD!'
Posted on 02/23/2008 6:05:48 AM PST by GeorgiaDawg32
Impressed with the fabrication of the story regarding John McCain, the National Enquirer today announced they will seek a buyout of the New York Times.
Said an anonymous spokesperson, "We are truly amazed that a major newspaper, supposedly in the mainstream and the purveyor of "All The News That's Fit To Print", would undertake a story of this magnitude with no basis in fact. We consider it on a par with our own "Tabloid" style that has enabled us to rocket to the top of the supermarket check-out rack".
"We make our living based on readers who are too stupid to realize our stories just aren't true, and Mr. Keller's statement yesterday that his readers were too dense to understand the "underlying" story falls perfectly in line with our thinking. Their use of "anonymous sources" was brilliant, as they could now print whatever they wanted under the guise of "We think we can prove it but won't even try, we'll just blame the reader".
The new "New York Enquiring Times" will be the standard bearer for years to come. We look forward to many years of fabrication, innuendo, flat out lies and a manipulation of the public. Of course, the Times has tried this tactic for many years, but we feel that under our tutorage, they can reach an entirely new level in meaningless, false stories."
Developing..
I don’t like the subject matter of the National Enquirer (which half-baked celebrity is cheating on which other), but they have a strong reputation for accuracy in their field.
When *they* announce two people are having affairs, it is very rare for both participants to deny it.
Good job, you Dawg!
Hahahaha! That’s funny!
That’s an A+ in my composition class.
:-)
Satire? It was making sense to me.
Agreed. This is supposed to be a slam at the NYT but it works better as one at the National Enquirer.
heh..their first headline after the merger, huh...ROFL..
I’ve often said that if I were at a newstand that had as a choice only two papers left, “The National Inquirer” or the “New York Times” I’d pick the Inquirer ... at least with the Inquirer you know it’s all B.S. and it is at least entertaining!
That is correct. National Enquirer, in my opinion, is far more accurate than the Times. The Enquirer is a Hollywood gossip paper, and does not do the unbelievable “bat boy” type stories.
LOL
This is all true... yep, yep
(Vigorously nodding head)
They would not risk the drop in credibility. Despite their reputation as a punchline for shoddy reporting, you’d be hard pressed to find a publication with a higher accuracy rating over the past 10-15 years than the Enquirer. Hell, during the first OJ trial a journalism school studied all rumors reported by major news outlets. The Enquirer was correct 80% of the time. The closest competitor was about 50%.
Well, I laughed. Could happen.
At least the quality of journalism would go up.
LOL
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