How to help your child cope with a bully

CNN.com ^ | 25 August 2008 | Judy Fortin

[Moose4]

A week before the start of the new school year, principal Denise Magee roamed the hallways of Campbell Middle School in Smyrna, Georgia, preparing for battle.

The adversary? Preteen and teenage bullies.

Toting anti-bullying posters and masking tape, Magee was determined to let students see from Day One that she had a zero-tolerance policy when it came to that kind of harassment.

"Middle-school kids are just cruel to each other," Magee said. "They speak their minds, so you see bullying in the form of teasing, taunting, social isolation and name calling."

The U.S. Department of Health and Human Services estimated that 30 percent of all children in grades six through 10 have been bullied or have bullied other children during a school year

[Jim Hill]

As I am sure you know, there are numerous different Taekwondo associations, federations, and alliances, both domestically and internationally. The various time and class attendance requirements between belts are governed by the guidelines adopted/enforced by the particular organization with which the student is affiliated.

[HighlyOpinionated]

I was bullied by a teacher when I was in 4th grade. And I had to finish out the year in her class. I think that's why I went from gregarious to shy overnight.

[LongElegantLegs]

The social atmosphere in a public school has NOTHING to do with civilized society. It’s an artificially constructed environment with less supervision than you might realize.

Homeschooling is a valid choice.

[rivercat]

WTF/Kukkiwon is 3 years minimum from 1st to 3rd Dan.
AAU is 3.5 years minimum from 1st to 3rd Dan, minimum age 13.
USAT is 3.5 years minimum from 1st to 3rd Dan.
ITF is 3.5 years minimum from 1st to 3rd Dan.
What else is there?

Then there's the technicality that the WTF/Kukkiwon (the real TKD governing body in Korea) does not recognize anyone under 18 years old as being a Black Belt. They are called a Poom (1st Poom, 2nd Poom, etc). I think it's fantastic that your kids have worked so hard at TKD, and I applaud their success. I just get equally nuts about schools that promote kids too fast, as well as the schools that promote any kid just because they have completed the time requirement. Both instances diminish the true value of the black belt.

[Jim Hill]

ITA - International Taekwondo Alliance (used to be the old USTA). It is all that is available near our residence.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/International_Taekwondo_Alliance

[ichabod1]

He thrusts his fists against the post and still insists he sees the ghost.

The POINT was, Jesus stood up to everyone that attacked him. He almost got thrown off a cliff, almost got stoned, and ultimately faced the cross. None of us could do what Jesus did, not one.

[rivercat]

ITA: 4 years minimum 1st to 3rd Dan; total time 7yrs, 4 months.
http://www.itatkd.com/tkdmintime.html

[meyer]

Some parents can inflame the situation. "You will encounter situations where parents will tell their kids, 'If you are hit, I want you to hit back.' "

Dang straight, they should hit back. Nothing encourages a bully more than a wimp - an easy target. Don't start a fight, but if a fight comes to you, you should by all means finish it. Defend yourself.

[jonno]

Poor Johnny - he probably did have a crush on her (Johnny sounds like me when I was a kid 8^)

Good tactic though - I know I would have been mortified to have my crush on a girl called out in front of the other kids.

[Artemis Webb]

"The POINT was, Jesus stood up to everyone that attacked him."

YOUR point was about Jesus!
My point was about bullying.

The thread is titled, "How to help your child cope with a bully". I related a personal anecdote to lead into a point which has nothing whatsoever to do with The Lord's trials.

Now since you don't want to be topical and talk about school bullying:

[ichabod1]

What does a bunny with a pancake on its head have to do with school bullying?

[Artemis Webb]

[BulletBobCo]

bump

[TexasRepublic]

I coped, more or less, knocking out a few bullies teeth along the way. I wasn’t too popular with their moms. :-)

[JewishRighter]

I was small as a kid (I’m no giant now but bigger than average) and I was what you called “scrappy”. I was scared to death of fighting, especially some of the bully types, but the minute someone took a swing at me, I’d go ape sh1t, punching straight to the face with everything I had. Couple of times, with kids with long hair I’d get a fistful of hair in one hand and go to work with the other. Broke a couple of noses. Never trained for it, I just went crazy once I get hit. Only got my arse kicked one time when a much bigger kid got on top of me on the ground and pummelled me good. In each case, once the fight was over, I never had a problem with that kid again. Some of ‘em even became really good friends.

Seems the world is different these days, though. I’d be a bit scared if it was my kid that you don’t know if even a 12, 13 or 14 year old isn’t going to pull a knife or come to school the next day with a gun.

[Twinkie]

IRVING !?!! Is that you ?!!!

[JewishRighter]

“IRVING !?!! Is that you ?!!!”

Nope, no Irving here. You get your butt kicked by someone named Irving? Is that why you took the name twinkie?

[IllumiNaughtyByNature]

How to help your child cope with a bully

Two words:

Krav Maga

[Dusty Road]

When my daughter was 7, she came home crying about the boy on the bus who kept pinching her and hitting her. I told her she had my permission to hit him back. 2 days later I get a call form the school wanting me to meet with the principle, my daughter had been in a fight. It seems the young man had punched her in the belly, she in turn, hit him over the head with her Fonzie lunch pail. He had to be taken to the ER for stitches. He never messed with her again.

[forkinsocket]

I can feel my stomach turning whenever this subject comes up.

Not so much for me, but for my boyfriend. We are many, he was alone. Evil “fighting” (with knives, chains, & bricks) every day after school for any reason imaginable, & worse consequences than getting beat up. I don’t want to think of what would have happened if he was small & defenseless. F**king scum, I get agitated just thinking about it.