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~~~~ThE oFfIcIaL fRiDaY sIlLiNeSs ThReAd ~~~~
Posted on 12/11/2009 4:41:32 AM PST by Lucky9teen
Getting ready for Christmas?
"In the old days, it was not called the Holiday Season; the Christians called it 'Christmas' and went to church; the Jews called it 'Hanukah' and went to synagogue; the atheists went to parties and drank. People passing each other on the street would say 'Merry Christmas!' or 'Happy Hanukah!' or (to the atheists) 'Look out for the wall!'" ~ Dave Barry
"Christmas at my house is always at least six or seven times more pleasant than anywhere else. We start drinking early. And while everyone else is seeing only one Santa Claus, we'll be seeing six or seven." ~ W. C. Fields
"The one thing women don't want to find in their stockings on Christmas morning is their husband." ~ Joan Rivers.
"Christmas is a time when kids tell Santa what they want and adults pay for it. Deficits are when adults tell the government what they want and their kids pay for it." ~ Richard Lamm
"Christmas at my house is always at least six or seven times more pleasant than anywhere else. We start drinking early. And while everyone else is seeing only one Santa Claus, we'll be seeing six or seven." ~ W.C. Fields
"The Supreme Court has ruled that they cannot have a nativity scene in Washington, D.C. This wasn't for any religious reasons. They couldn't find three wise men and a virgin." ~ Jay Leno.
"Santa Claus wears a Red Suit, He must be a communist. And a beard and long hair, Must be a pacifist. What's in that pipe that he's smoking?" ~ Arlo Guthrie
"I once bought my kids a set of batteries for Christmas with a note on it saying, toys not included." ~ Bernard Manning.
"Dear Lord, I've been asked, nay commanded, to thank Thee for the Christmas turkey before us... a turkey which was no doubt a lively, intelligent bird... a social being... capable of actual affection... nuzzling its young with almost human- like compassion. Anyway, it's dead and we're gonna eat it. Please give our respects to its family... " Berke Breathed
TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: christmas; mishap; ofst; silliness
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To: Lucky9teen
81
posted on
12/11/2009 9:08:06 AM PST
by
AZ .44 MAG
(I'm Jim Thompson and I say our government is a joke and its current makeup is the punch line.)
To: ShadowAce
Me too! Unfortunately, the reason I’m taking vacation is that I have a number of use-or-lose days that expire Dec. 31, so I’m kicking myself out of my office and forcing myself to take time off. It all basically means I have no life...
82
posted on
12/11/2009 9:11:40 AM PST
by
Hoffer Rand
(There ARE two Americas: "God's children" and the tax payers)
To: AZ .44 MAG
83
posted on
12/11/2009 9:16:22 AM PST
by
Lucky9teen
(Pray for Obama! Psalm 109:8 reads, “Let his days be few; and let another take his office.”)
To: ErnBatavia
84
posted on
12/11/2009 9:17:08 AM PST
by
Lucky9teen
(Pray for Obama! Psalm 109:8 reads, “Let his days be few; and let another take his office.”)
To: Lucky9teen
85
posted on
12/11/2009 10:04:30 AM PST
by
expatguy
(Support "An American Expat in Southeast Asia" - DONATE)
To: expatguy
Bob Gates = male version of “Aunt Bethany” (from Christmas vacation!)
To: Lucky9teen
87
posted on
12/11/2009 10:18:56 AM PST
by
Logic n' Reason
(If you always do what you always did, you'll always get what you always got.)
88
posted on
12/11/2009 12:21:53 PM PST
by
ShadowAce
(Linux -- The Ultimate Windows Service Pack)
To: Lucky9teen
Don't miss the 0prah/0bama Christmas Special!
89
posted on
12/11/2009 12:26:44 PM PST
by
paulycy
(Demand Constitutionality.)
To: Lucky9teen
Happy Holiday from the Sunshine State
Take-out, Pork Dinner
90
posted on
12/11/2009 12:28:31 PM PST
by
Sax
To: Lucky9teen
91
posted on
12/11/2009 12:35:41 PM PST
by
Izzy Dunne
(Hello, I'm a TAGLINE virus. Please help me spread by copying me into YOUR tag line.)
To: Lucky9teen
92
posted on
12/11/2009 12:36:13 PM PST
by
Izzy Dunne
(Hello, I'm a TAGLINE virus. Please help me spread by copying me into YOUR tag line.)
To: Lucky9teen
93
posted on
12/11/2009 12:37:51 PM PST
by
Izzy Dunne
(Hello, I'm a TAGLINE virus. Please help me spread by copying me into YOUR tag line.)
To: Lucky9teen
94
posted on
12/11/2009 12:44:16 PM PST
by
Izzy Dunne
(Hello, I'm a TAGLINE virus. Please help me spread by copying me into YOUR tag line.)
To: Lucky9teen
Isn’t it amazing how this thread never ends up on the same topic it starts on?
95
posted on
12/11/2009 12:48:53 PM PST
by
Pan_Yan
To: Izzy Dunne
96
posted on
12/11/2009 12:56:33 PM PST
by
Lucky9teen
(Pray for Obama! Psalm 109:8 reads, “Let his days be few; and let another take his office.”)
To: Pan_Yan
Sometimes, anything goes
97
posted on
12/11/2009 12:57:30 PM PST
by
Lucky9teen
(Pray for Obama! Psalm 109:8 reads, “Let his days be few; and let another take his office.”)
To: Lucky9teen
98
posted on
12/11/2009 1:23:59 PM PST
by
ShadowAce
(Linux -- The Ultimate Windows Service Pack)
To: ShadowAce
99
posted on
12/11/2009 1:24:18 PM PST
by
ShadowAce
(Linux -- The Ultimate Windows Service Pack)
To: ShadowAce
100
posted on
12/11/2009 1:24:36 PM PST
by
ShadowAce
(Linux -- The Ultimate Windows Service Pack)
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