Posted on 07/10/2010 9:51:39 AM PDT by OneVike
The ones in my freezer are curiously docile.
Names have been removed to protect the stupid!
I had this idea that I was going to rope a deer, put it in a stall, sweet feed it on corn for a few weeks, then butcher it and eat it. Yum! Corn-fed venison. The first step in this adventure was getting a deer.
Since they congregate at my cattle feeder and do not have much fear of me (a bold one will sometimes come right up and sniff at the bags of feed while I am in the back of the truck four feet away) it should not be difficult to rope one, toss a bag over its head to calm it down, then hog-tie it and transport it home.
I filled the cattle feeder and hid behind it with my rope. The cattle, having seen a roping or two before, stayed well back. They were not having any of it.
After 20 minutes, my deer showed up, 3 of them. I picked a likely looking one, stepped out, and threw my rope. The deer just stood there and stared at me. I wrapped the rope around my waist and twisted the end so I would have a good hold. The deer still just stood and stared at me, but you could tell she was mildly concerned about the whole rope situation.
I took a step toward it. It took a step away. I put a little tension on the rope, and received an education. The first thing I learned is that, while a deer may just stand there looking at you funny while you rope it, it is spurred to action when you start pulling on that rope.
That deer EXPLODED.
The second thing I learned is that, pound for pound, a deer is a LOT stronger than a cow or a colt. A cow or a colt in that weight range, I could fight down with some dignity. A deer? No chance.
That thing ran and bucked, it twisted and pulled. There was no controlling that deer, and certainly no getting close to it. As it jerked me off my feet and started dragging me across the ground, it occurred to me that having a deer firmly attached to a rope was not such a good idea. The only upside is that they do not have much stamina.
A brief ten minutes later it was tired, and not as quick to jerk me off my feet and drag me. It took me a few minutes to realize this, since I was mostly blinded by the blood flowing out of the big gash in my head.
At that point, I had lost my appetite for corn-fed venison. I hated the thing, and would hazard a guess that the feeling was mutual. I just wanted to get that devil creature off the end of that rope. But if I let it go with the rope hanging around its neck, it would likely die slow and painful somewhere.
Despite the gash in my head, and several large knots where I had cleverly arrested the deer’s pell-mell flight by bracing my head against large rocks as it dragged me across the ground, I could still think clearly enough to recognize that I shared some tiny amount of responsibility for the situation we were in. I didn’t want the deer to suffer a slow death.
I managed to get it lined up between my truck and the feeder, a little trap I had set beforehand, like a squeeze chute. I backed it in there, and I started moving forward to get my rope back.
Did you know that deer bite? They do!
I never in a million years would have thought that a deer would bite, so I was very surprised when I reached up there to grab hold of that rope, and the deer grabbed hold of my wrist. Now, when a deer bites you, it is not like a horse, it does not just bite and let go. A deer bites and shakes its head, like a pit bull. They bite HARD and won’t let go. It hurts!
The proper reaction when a deer bites you is probably to freeze and draw back slowly. I tried screaming and wrenching away. My method was ineffective. It felt like that deer bit and shook me for several minutes, but it was likely only several seconds.
I, being smarter than a deer (though you may be questioning that claim by now) tricked it. While I kept it busy tearing the bejesus out of my right arm, I reached up with my left hand and pulled that rope loose. That was when I learned my final lesson in deer behavior for the day.
Deer will strike at you with their front feet. They rear right up and strike at head and shoulder level, and their hooves are surprisingly sharp. I learned long ago that when a horse strikes at you with its hooves and you can’t get away, the best thing to do is make a loud noise and move aggressively towards the animal. This will cause it to back down a bit, so you can make your escape.
This was not a horse. This was a deer. Obviously, such trickery would not work. In the course of a millisecond, I devised a different strategy. I screamed like a woman and turned to run.
The reason we have been taught NOT to turn and run from a horse that paws at you is that there is a good chance that it will hit you in the back of the head. Deer are not so different from horses after all, other than being twice as strong and three times as evil. The second I turned to run, it hit me right in the back of the head and knocked me down.
When a deer paws at you and knocks you down, it does not immediately depart. I suspect it does not recognize that the danger has passed. What it does instead is paw your back and jump up and down on you, while you are laying there crying like a little girl and covering your head.
I finally managed to crawl under the truck, and the deer went away. Now I know why people go deer hunting with a rifle and a scope. It’s so they can be somewhat equal to the prey.
http://www.darwinawards.com/legends/legends2007-02.html
Lots more. Google roping a deer.
I love Bambi....Bambi’s mom’s breaded cutlets are the best ever.
I got your cure for Bambi right here.
Cheers!
Check out Bambi defending her young links to other videos you may have not yet seen also....
My nephew, Justyn, is the starting pitcher in the championship game of the district A + B Little League allstars today. If they win they go to Redding for the next round, then the Bay area, and eventually on to Southern Ca to qualify for world. Last time he pitched he struck out 15 batters while throwing just 51 pitches in 5 innings. He allowed only one batter to reach base and no runs. He also hit a solo home run and reached base two other times he was up to bat. Wish him luck today, he plays at noon. So I need to get going soon.
• Send FReep Mail to OneVike to get [ON] or [OFF] article and video Ping List •
SPLATTERIFIC!
Fascinating video & good information. What was surprising is that the cat was more savvy than the poor dog.
It seems as if the cat swapped scents with the fawn, confusing the mother doe. That was clever;)
Was the dog OK after the attack???
I am laughing so hard I can barely type this. ROTFLMAO!
Perhaps one can say, without sarcasm, one of life’s little lessons learned?
Animals are feral-sometimes we have to figure out what feral means. Did they continue to be so comfortable around you?
I thought is was about OBambi’s true nature protecting his form (conduct as president) — maybe a video of the president arguing with the generals about using UAVs against opponents — DoJ said OK as long as they were crackers or cracker babies.
Saw a huge black bear kill a fawn hidden in the ferns of my back yard (live in the Poconos). Mamma deer heard the fawn scream and came running.... she was suicidal, attacking that bear constantly for about ten minutes solid until it was clear that fawn had already died.
Ah, those oldies but goodies. Still makes me laugh.
Funny stuff - thanks for the laugh;) (and the lesson)
.
Amazingly curious, brave cat! LOL
I see where, ‘curiosity killed the cat’ comes from.
Notice near the end when he approaches the deer, swats it on the nose and runs away.
.
Thanks for the ping!
This is how it is done boy.
Notice, NO pimping!
Cutest videos ever- adorable puppy in love with cat:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ytedC1heY_8&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kggMi_hRyIc&feature=player_embedded
Deer are the most deadly animal in the USA. They claim most of their victims by car crashes.
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.