Free Republic
Browse · Search
General/Chat
Topics · Post Article

Skip to comments.

Source: CVN-69, to be commissioned in 2019, will be named USS Barack Obama
Liberal Lunacy ^ | 5/14/11 | Liberal Lunacy Staff/REM

Posted on 05/14/2011 10:57:02 AM PDT by GeorgiaDawg32

(Washington, D.C., 5/14/11) In an announcement quietly released on Friday evening, it was announced by an anonymous source within the administration the Navy's newest aircraft carrier, currently designated CVN-69 and scheduled for commissioning in 2019 will be called the USS Barack Obama.

The statement read in part, "A president such as Barack Obama, will be dutifully and respectfully honored by having CVN-69 named for him. His courage, honor, honesty and ability to effectively lead this nation through hard times brought upon us by previous Republican administrations to unparalleled prosperity and record numbers on government assistance ensuring thousands of federal government jobs are the hallmarks of a great President deserving of every accolade which can be given.”

“We are also pleased to announce that CVN-69 will be “manned” by the first all gay crew on board a U.S. Navy vessel in honor of Obama’s commitment to allow gays in the military. We will be making some adjustments to the vessel in order to ensure a happy gay crew such as a small wedding chapel in the rear of the ship as well as double-wide bunks that can easily accommodate up to 3 sailors. The crew’s lounge will be renamed the “Frolic Area” and will be in the rear next to the wedding chapel. Other adjustments are under discussion such as an onboard florist and a hair stylist.”

"One last thing, CVN-70, scheduled for commissioning in 2023 is tentatively named the USS Michele Obama."

Developing..


TOPICS: Chit/Chat; Miscellaneous
KEYWORDS: humor; obama; satire

1 posted on 05/14/2011 10:57:08 AM PDT by GeorgiaDawg32
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | View Replies]

Comment #2 Removed by Moderator

To: GeorgiaDawg32

A usual friday gubmint Big Sh!tty!!!!!

A bit late...


3 posted on 05/14/2011 11:03:57 AM PDT by gunnyg ("A Constitution changed from Freedom, can never be restored; Liberty, once lost, is lost forever...)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: GeorgiaDawg32

The USS Michelle Obama would have a pretty wide stern.


4 posted on 05/14/2011 11:05:07 AM PDT by stbdside
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: GeorgiaDawg32

Is this the carrier they were originally going to name the USS Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell but later changed the name to the USS Nobel Peace Prize?


5 posted on 05/14/2011 11:05:45 AM PDT by FlingWingFlyer ("...that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights,..")
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: GeorgiaDawg32

Thank goodnesss this is satire. For now.


6 posted on 05/14/2011 11:06:00 AM PDT by HereInTheHeartland (Those who endured Valley Forge didn't make their sacrifice to give us free health care)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: stbdside
The USS Michelle Obama would have a pretty wide stern.

Still wouldn't be able to go through the Panama Canal even after doubling the width.

7 posted on 05/14/2011 11:09:08 AM PDT by immadashell
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 4 | View Replies]

To: GeorgiaDawg32

Maybe it won’t fire a shot or sink on its first day.


8 posted on 05/14/2011 11:09:47 AM PDT by Jonty30
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: GeorgiaDawg32

CVN-69 is the USS Dwight D. Eisenhower, “Big Ike.” My dad’s old boat.


9 posted on 05/14/2011 11:09:47 AM PDT by Tax-chick (Obama's "Gutsy Decision": Who's gonna tell the fool that he ain't cool?)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Tax-chick

I know. I caught that after I posted. My fingers didn’t work so good..:(


10 posted on 05/14/2011 11:12:52 AM PDT by GeorgiaDawg32 (A well armed lamb will contest the vote)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 9 | View Replies]

To: GeorgiaDawg32

They will save a lot of energy from the new reactor because crew members will simply volunteer to launch even the heavist aircraft using only projectile vomit. Saves over a billion in un-needed systems on the carrier.


11 posted on 05/14/2011 11:16:07 AM PDT by ICE-FLYER (God bless and keep the United States of America)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: GeorgiaDawg32

12 posted on 05/14/2011 11:24:05 AM PDT by Doogle ((USAF.68-73..8th TFW Ubon Thailand..never store a threat you should have eliminated))
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: GeorgiaDawg32

It will be useless. The captain will call for a starboard turn and it wil turn to port, always.


13 posted on 05/14/2011 11:25:36 AM PDT by VRW Conspirator (Multiculturalism made us tolerate the intolerant, and now intolerance is annihilating tolerance. -GW)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: GeorgiaDawg32

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_aircraft_carriers_of_the_United_States_Navy

TOTALLY BOGUS STORY, YANK THIS THREAAD!!!


14 posted on 05/14/2011 11:34:48 AM PDT by RaceBannon (Ron Paul is to the Constitution what Fred Phelps is to the Bible.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: RaceBannon

Always... always ... always look at KEYWORDS! Look for the word satire!


15 posted on 05/14/2011 11:49:20 AM PDT by missnry (The truth will set you free ... and drive liberals Crazy!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 14 | View Replies]

To: stbdside

It has to be , She makes accomodations for the biggest A-Hole ever to be President.


16 posted on 05/14/2011 11:57:16 AM PDT by Waverunner (I'd like to welcome our new overlords, say hello to my little friend)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 4 | View Replies]

To: GeorgiaDawg32

Would they paint it pink like the sub in the movie “Operation Petticoat?”


17 posted on 05/14/2011 12:01:12 PM PDT by OldMissileer (Atlas, Titan, Minuteman, PK. Winners of the Cold War)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: missnry

Are you accusing me of just scanning the first paragraph and not readin the entire article at the link??

Well, just because that’s true...Oh, all right...I repent! :(


18 posted on 05/14/2011 12:05:01 PM PDT by RaceBannon (Ron Paul is to the Constitution what Fred Phelps is to the Bible.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 15 | View Replies]

To: GeorgiaDawg32

Lemme guess. It’ll be able to launch jets, but they won’t be able to return to the ship.... ever.


19 posted on 05/14/2011 12:05:13 PM PDT by b4its2late (Ignorance allows liberalism to prosper.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: GeorgiaDawg32

To be worthy of its namesake, the Captain, XO, and the division czars will be political appointees, exempt from the UCMJ.

The crew will be thrice the size of what’s necessary.

All the officers and petty officers will have to kick in a tax to pay for all the non-rates (even after the non-rates PCS to another ship or station or are discharged).

It will have difficulty launching aircraft from a deck more suited for putt-putt golf.

Brazil will build it because their labor is cheaper, and we don’t want to be racist.

It should terrify our enemies when it goes to sea, but will actually spend most of its time in dry dock because it will be managed like the city of Detroit.

It should have a fine progressive war record.


20 posted on 05/14/2011 12:22:10 PM PDT by Salvavida (The restoration of the U.S.A. starts with filling the pews at every Bible-believing church.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: GeorgiaDawg32

Will USS 0bama be always moving in reverse?


21 posted on 05/14/2011 12:26:35 PM PDT by 1_Rain_Drop
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: GeorgiaDawg32

SOEBARKAH!!!


22 posted on 05/14/2011 12:31:59 PM PDT by Hotlanta Mike (TeaNami)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: VRW Conspirator
It is actually one of the first government cruise ships. It promises wonderful cruises at no cost. Once on board the ship never leaves the dock. You just listen to Obama speeches for 2 weeks while you eat granola. The ship crew of 10,000 ( most no shows) will receive lifetime pensions for their participation.
At the end of the 2 weeks you will receive a bill for $ 150,000 each, due to cost overrun due to Bush. If your rich enough to even think of going on a cruise it only your fair share.
23 posted on 05/14/2011 12:32:34 PM PDT by mike2880
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 13 | View Replies]



DONATE
Click the Pic

24 posted on 05/14/2011 12:48:02 PM PDT by TheOldLady
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | View Replies]

To: RaceBannon

It’s satire.At least we hope it is.


25 posted on 05/14/2011 12:57:02 PM PDT by WePledge (Ich werde fur immer ein Hollenhund werden. Semper Fidelis)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 14 | View Replies]

To: GeorgiaDawg32

26 posted on 05/14/2011 1:09:32 PM PDT by SERKIT ("Blazing Saddles" explains it all......)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: GeorgiaDawg32

Satire strikes again- I hope!


27 posted on 05/14/2011 1:34:16 PM PDT by JimRed (Excising a cancer before it kills us waters the Tree of Liberty! TERM LIMITS, NOW AND FOREVER!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: GeorgiaDawg32
The USS Barack Obama




28 posted on 05/14/2011 2:22:53 PM PDT by Beckwith (A "natural born citizen" -- two American citizen parents and born in the USA.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: GeorgiaDawg32
Don't even joke about such a thing........Seriously!
29 posted on 05/14/2011 2:34:36 PM PDT by The Cajun (Palin, Bachmann, Free Republic, Mark Levin, Rush, Hannity......Nuff said.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: GeorgiaDawg32

PLEASE say you’re kidding?


30 posted on 05/14/2011 4:04:10 PM PDT by DefeatCorruption
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: John Semmens

Tell me the truth, John, did you write this??????? LOL!


31 posted on 05/14/2011 4:36:59 PM PDT by Shimmer1 (Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Waverunner

USS BArack Obama - garbage barge


32 posted on 05/14/2011 7:50:41 PM PDT by stbdside
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 16 | View Replies]

To: GeorgiaDawg32
humor; obama; satire

Whew!

33 posted on 05/15/2011 4:53:13 AM PDT by lowbridge (Rep. Dingell: "Its taken a long time.....to control the people.")
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: GeorgiaDawg32

What goes around, comes around (yes I know it is satire).

Naming CVNs after dead politicians is, and always was, a very VERY bad idea.

Using Gerald Ford and George HW Bush has made the USS Barack Obama and the USS William J. Clinton inevitable. It’s just a matter of time.


34 posted on 05/15/2011 4:59:06 AM PDT by Jim Noble (The Constitution is overthrown. The Revolution is betrayed.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.

Free Republic
Browse · Search
General/Chat
Topics · Post Article

FreeRepublic, LLC, PO BOX 9771, FRESNO, CA 93794
FreeRepublic.com is powered by software copyright 2000-2008 John Robinson