Posted on 07/26/2013 7:00:32 AM PDT by Puppage
Researchers for the Massachusetts Turnpike Authority found over 200 dead crows near greater Boston recently, and there was concern that they may have died from Avian Flu. A Bird Pathologist examined the remains of all the crows, and, to everyone's relief, confirmed the problem was definitely NOT Avian Flu.
The cause of death appeared to be vehicular impacts. However, during the detailed analysis it was noted that varying colors of paints appeared on the bird's beaks and claws. By analyzing these paint residues it was determined that 98% of the crows had been killed by impact with trucks, while only 2% were killed by an impact with a car. MTA then hired an Ornithological Behaviorist to determine if there was a cause for the disproportionate percentages of truck kills versus car kills. The Ornithological Behaviorist very quickly concluded the cause: when crows eat road kill, they always have a look-out crow in a nearby tree to warn of impending danger. They discovered that while all the lookout crows could shout "Cah", not a single one could shout "Truck."
Evolution will take care of this
23-yr-old engineer commits suicide. Reason: A crow sat on his head
I get it.
“The crows seemed to be calling his name, thought Caw.” — Jack Handey
(Pssst! Let's see how many replies we get before people finally catch on that this is a joke. Tee-hee!)
HAH...funny, I was just having a conversation about how crows will kill look out crows who fail to warn the “murder” of crows of impending danger. And yes, the term is “murder” of crows.......(sorry if OP mentioned that already)
I think I’ll have some Chowdah.
I didn't know Tonto was an engineer. Well, he did drive a train for a bit.
Funny. I knew it had to be a joke because crows are incredibly intelligent. Where I’m at in central MA our crows are so huge we call them cravens, looks like crows, size of a raven.
“... varying colors of paints appeared on the bird’s beaks and claws. By analyzing these paint residues it was determined that 98% of the crows had been killed by impact with trucks, while only 2% were killed by an impact with a car.”
Learn something new everyday.
“varying colors of paints appeared on the bird’s beaks and claws”
I half expected to read that researchers found the birds had been sniffing paint...
Then why do these lookouts don’t learn to say “cah-cah” for truck?
Stupid liberal crows.
Are there any statistics on paint colors vs crow deaths?
Perhaps MA could come up with a scheme to ban cars with certain paint colors.
They could then move over to painting wind turbines in colors that prove the least lethal to birds.
I am awaiting my call from Stockholm to schedule my appearance at the next Nobel Prize gathering.
There might be another twist to this. Crows have rather unusual vision, which can be described as “inverse grayscale”. That is, for them, white is black, and black is white. So on a dark night, all they can see is solid white.
However, artificial illumination at night confuses things, by injecting black into the white. This might be a bizarre contributing factor.
My wife’s sister’s shaggy dog bit my moose.
If I could vote for the Nobel Prize, you’d get mine.
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