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10 Things Never To Say To A Flight Attendant
Yahoo ^ | 3/18/14 | Yahoo

Posted on 03/19/2014 12:49:41 PM PDT by Lmo56

Pics with captions only ...

(Excerpt) Read more at travel.yahoo.com ...


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: attendantwords
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#11 - If trying to pick up the flight attendant, don't say:

"Honey, I'm a pilot for Malaysia Airlines ..."

1 posted on 03/19/2014 12:49:42 PM PDT by Lmo56
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To: Lmo56

“I’m tempted to plug my charger into you because you look electrifying!” -Picture that said by a 70’s throwback leisure suit creeper.


2 posted on 03/19/2014 12:52:12 PM PDT by Darksheare (Try my coffee, first one's free..... Even robots will kill for it!)
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To: Lmo56
I don’t see Chuck Schumer in that list.
3 posted on 03/19/2014 12:52:40 PM PDT by Olog-hai
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To: Lmo56

Or you can say “Do you know who I am?” like Hollywood liberals say when the flight attendant asks them to shut off their cellphone.


4 posted on 03/19/2014 12:55:37 PM PDT by GrandJediMasterYoda (Hitlery: Incarnation of evil.)
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To: Lmo56
10 Things Never To Say To A Flight Attendant

What things?

5 posted on 03/19/2014 12:57:01 PM PDT by PapaNew
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To: Lmo56
Don't change your baby on the tray table? Wow!

6 posted on 03/19/2014 12:57:32 PM PDT by Genoa (Starve the beast.)
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To: Lmo56; Revolting cat!

While in the closet/restroom, ring for assistance.


7 posted on 03/19/2014 12:57:39 PM PDT by a fool in paradise (The Texas judge's decision was to pave the way for same sex divorce for two Massachusetts women.)
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To: Olog-hai

Ha ha! So now they’ve graduated to “bitch”..See my post below yours #4.


8 posted on 03/19/2014 12:58:06 PM PDT by GrandJediMasterYoda (Hitlery: Incarnation of evil.)
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To: Lmo56

Hey, sky waitress: Do you speak Jive?


9 posted on 03/19/2014 12:58:22 PM PDT by thesharkboy (posting without reading the article since 1998)
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To: PapaNew

A bunch of “sorry, that’s beyond my paygrade” gripes that used to be common service.


10 posted on 03/19/2014 12:58:27 PM PDT by a fool in paradise (The Texas judge's decision was to pave the way for same sex divorce for two Massachusetts women.)
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To: Lmo56

To a male one, “So, you got a girlfriend?”


11 posted on 03/19/2014 12:59:25 PM PDT by dfwgator
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To: Lmo56

“Is this the Kosher meal?”


12 posted on 03/19/2014 1:01:08 PM PDT by stevie_d_64 (It's not the color of one's skin that offends people...it's how thin it is.)
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To: Lmo56; Daffynition; nickcarraway; Slings and Arrows

13 posted on 03/19/2014 1:01:38 PM PDT by Ezekiel (All who mourn the destruction of America merit the celebration of her rebirth.)
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To: Lmo56
I had an attractive female acquaintance who was once an airline stewardess (remember when they were attractive?) and she was asked at least once on every flight by some guy, "Are we really going to fly united"?

Yeah, she was not amused.

14 posted on 03/19/2014 1:01:57 PM PDT by Robwin
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To: Lmo56

“Hey, honey, can you light my cigarette?”


15 posted on 03/19/2014 1:02:23 PM PDT by CodeToad (Keeping whites from talking about blacks is verbal segregation!)
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To: Lmo56

“I think there’s a Chihuahua in the toilet.”


16 posted on 03/19/2014 1:02:41 PM PDT by blueunicorn6 ("A crack shot and a good dancer")
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To: Lmo56
"There's a man on the wing..."


17 posted on 03/19/2014 1:03:39 PM PDT by GrandJediMasterYoda (Hitlery: Incarnation of evil.)
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To: Lmo56

“When are you going to turn on the smoking light?”


18 posted on 03/19/2014 1:05:28 PM PDT by GrandJediMasterYoda (Hitlery: Incarnation of evil.)
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To: Lmo56

Is ACARS and the transponder still on? /s


19 posted on 03/19/2014 1:06:02 PM PDT by QT3.14
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To: blueunicorn6

Snort ;>)


20 posted on 03/19/2014 1:07:35 PM PDT by Covenantor ("Men are ruled...by liars who refuse them news, and by fools who cannot govern." Chesterton)
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To: Darksheare

‘a 70’s throwback leisure suit creeper.’

I’m not sure, but, are you implying that there is something wrong with that?


21 posted on 03/19/2014 1:08:28 PM PDT by Delta Dawn (Fluent in two languages: English and cursive.)
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To: Delta Dawn

Well, being a creeper in a 70’s style leisure suit would tend to be a bad thing.


22 posted on 03/19/2014 1:09:31 PM PDT by Darksheare (Try my coffee, first one's free..... Even robots will kill for it!)
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To: Lmo56

They get snippy when you call them “waitress”.


23 posted on 03/19/2014 1:10:29 PM PDT by Veggie Todd (The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants. TJ)
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To: Lmo56

“Would you mind holding my detonator while I try to get this shoe off?”


24 posted on 03/19/2014 1:17:41 PM PDT by inpajamas (http://outskirtspress.com/ONE)
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To: Lmo56

Nothing but the highest respect for cabin crew.


25 posted on 03/19/2014 1:17:58 PM PDT by onedoug
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To: GrandJediMasterYoda

What is the name of that episode?


26 posted on 03/19/2014 1:22:52 PM PDT by Gamecock
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To: Lmo56

Where is my seafood meal?


27 posted on 03/19/2014 1:23:15 PM PDT by smokingfrog ( sleep with one eye open (<o> ---)
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To: Ezekiel

I speak jive:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g0j2dVuhr6s

Airplane


28 posted on 03/19/2014 1:28:14 PM PDT by gaijin
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To: Gamecock
Nightmare at 20,000 feet.
29 posted on 03/19/2014 1:30:11 PM PDT by smokingfrog ( sleep with one eye open (<o> ---)
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To: GrandJediMasterYoda

Can someone edit that picture to make it the wife of the disbarred impeached former rapist in chief on the wing?


30 posted on 03/19/2014 1:32:13 PM PDT by EQAndyBuzz ("Heck of a reset there, Hillary")
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To: Lmo56

If his name is “Jack”, don’t say “Hi.”


31 posted on 03/19/2014 1:32:39 PM PDT by dfwgator
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To: GrandJediMasterYoda
"There's a man on the wing..."

So that's how she got to China.

32 posted on 03/19/2014 1:34:29 PM PDT by dfwgator
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To: Lmo56
That’s a good list. I could add to it:

Fortunately, I quit flying before everyone had a smart phone. That would have driven me absolutely insane.

33 posted on 03/19/2014 1:35:12 PM PDT by ponygirl (Be Breitbart.)
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To: CodeToad

That’s funny. I flew for TWA years and years ago but was grounded when I got married. We used to carry a lighter in our apron pocket in case someone needed a light for their cigarette. Don’t recall that anyone ever called me “honey” though, except the Captain. Generally it was ma’am or Miss. But back then male passengers had manners.

Between the flight attendants now - most of whom are too old to be flying or overweight or just first class crabbyasses - and TSA I refuse to fly any more.


34 posted on 03/19/2014 1:35:15 PM PDT by Grams A (The Sun will rise in the East in the morning and God is still on his throne.)
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To: Lmo56
a sure way to get on a flight attendant's bad side.

Good side, bad side, what's the difference?

35 posted on 03/19/2014 1:35:41 PM PDT by DManA
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To: CodeToad

That’s funny. I flew for TWA years and years ago but was grounded when I got married. We used to carry a lighter in our apron pocket in case someone needed a light for their cigarette. Don’t recall that anyone ever called me “honey” though, except the Captain. Generally it was ma’am or Miss. But back then male passengers had manners.

Between the flight attendants now - most of whom are too old to be flying or overweight or just first class crabbyasses - and TSA I refuse to fly any more.


36 posted on 03/19/2014 1:36:12 PM PDT by Grams A (The Sun will rise in the East in the morning and God is still on his throne.)
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To: DManA

Yeah...I know women upside down and backwards...(which ain’t a bad way to know them!)

(Hat tip to Rodney Dangerfield...I think...:)


37 posted on 03/19/2014 1:40:19 PM PDT by rlmorel ("A nation, despicable by its weakness, forfeits even the privilege of being neutral." A. Hamilton)
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To: Lmo56

Why did stewardesses accept being referred to as “flight attendants”? It seems like a demotion. The term “stewardess” implies trust and responsibility. On the other hand, “flight attendant” has the same ring as “gas station attendant.”


38 posted on 03/19/2014 1:46:44 PM PDT by Fiji Hill
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To: DManA
Good side, bad side, what's the difference?

Eddie: Hey Ralph, you been gettin' any on the side lately?

Ralph: It's been so long, I didn't know they moved it.

39 posted on 03/19/2014 1:49:43 PM PDT by Jeff Chandler (Obamacare: You can't make an omelette without breaking a few eggs.)
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To: Lmo56
For many years starting in 1961, saying the word "Cuba" in an airliner was verboten.
40 posted on 03/19/2014 1:52:03 PM PDT by Fiji Hill
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To: Lmo56

“Hi, Jackie!”


41 posted on 03/19/2014 1:57:30 PM PDT by eCSMaster ("It is not the color of his skin, ... it is the blackness that fills his soul")
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To: Fiji Hill

Exactly. But the term is not sexist. And PC speech is all that matters now that the inmates are running the asylum.


42 posted on 03/19/2014 1:59:07 PM PDT by Vigilanteman (Obama: Fake black man. Fake Messiah. Fake American. How many fakes can you fit in one Zer0?)
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To: gaijin

Have to admit to on occasion using the line “Chump no want ne’ hep Chump no get ne’ hep”. Certainly draws fewer strange looks than “Have you ever seen a grown man naked?”


43 posted on 03/19/2014 2:04:45 PM PDT by katana (Just my opinions)
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To: gaijin
Always one of my favorite Youtube clips, thanks.

Another big fav is Steve Martin's King Tut. Not to thread hijack, but... lol

44 posted on 03/19/2014 2:05:03 PM PDT by Ezekiel (All who mourn the destruction of America merit the celebration of her rebirth.)
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To: Lmo56

Whats the other ones name ?


45 posted on 03/19/2014 2:06:00 PM PDT by al baby (Hi MomÂ… I was refereeing to Obama)
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To: Fiji Hill

"Fly this plane to Luton."

46 posted on 03/19/2014 2:07:01 PM PDT by dfwgator
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To: ponygirl
“•If we run out of your meal selection, I’m sorry, but it does not entitle you to a seat upgrade/drink/movie rental no matter how much you bitch and moan. Meals are not stocked 100% of each selection. That’s just how it works.”

Right along with the insincere “What will you be having” question when the stewardess already knows what is out and what they have left. . .but ask anyway, just hoping the passenger selects what is left, that way the passenger hasn't a clue he had no choice to begin with.

(I don't like being played like that. Just tell me what is left and I'll pick from that list.)

I recall the days when passengers dressed cleanly and didn't board wearing their jammies and didn't carry a pillow, and actually bathed before flight and had the children under control.

I also remember the days when the stewardess was nice, first, then crabby if necessary. Nowaday's mostly straight to crabby.

Best stewardesses are foreign carriers from the mid-East or Asia. Not only nice but nice to look at. The 60-yr old mean stewardesses that wanted a pilot to marry and either did and now are divorced or never married one, and the union shafted them one too many times, they are mean and take it out on even quiet passengers that know flying is a pain, that flying is something to endure and something that is not fun for anyone. Business travelers, like myself (First domestic and Business international), get on, sit down, pack light with reasonable roll-on and briefcase, don't talk to the guy next to me, never page the stewardess, and simply try and sleeep. Still. . .many times just being on the jet is enough to be viewed as trash by the cabin crew.

47 posted on 03/19/2014 2:09:03 PM PDT by Hulka
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To: Lmo56

More than half the list is just whining and bitching because the job’s “too hard.” Some items are good to know, but most are stupid.


48 posted on 03/19/2014 2:10:04 PM PDT by Cyber Liberty (H.L. Mencken: "The urge to save humanity is almost always a false front for the urge to rule.")
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To: dfwgator

ha! over 85% of them are homosexual. my source is a veteran, now retired stewardess with 40+ years of flying.


49 posted on 03/19/2014 2:13:10 PM PDT by Secret Agent Man (Gone Galt; Not averse to Going Bronson.)
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To: Lmo56

I met my wife on a plane. She was a flight attendant and I was getting on the plane with crutches. She asked if I needed help, I told her I could manage, she then asked me what happened to my leg. I told her the last plane I was on went down and kept going straight to my seat.

When the seat belt light went off, she came right back to ask me what really happened, by the end of the flight, I knew she was the one and I married her three months later.


50 posted on 03/19/2014 2:13:16 PM PDT by dangerdoc (I don't think you should be forced to make the same decision I did even if I know I'm right.)
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