Skip to comments.Funny Interviews: Meet the Dumbest Job Applicants
Posted on 07/27/2014 6:31:18 PM PDT by Innovative
"An individual applied for a customer-service job, and when asked what he might not like about the job, he said, 'Dealing with people.'"
"I had somebody list their prison time as a job. And an exotic dancer who called herself a 'customer service representative.'"
(Excerpt) Read more at rd.com ...
Those are all pretty good. People are amazingly strange. I liked this one: “Candidate specified that his availability was limited because Friday, Saturday, and Sunday was ‘drinking time.’”
I once had an applicant write “Call 911” under the section that asked who to contact in case of an emergency.
IIRC “escorts” in Asia are called Guest Relations Officers (GROs) or some such.
Ok the stripper as customer service is just creative. The dude with the bird scares me more.
I would say that he had a clear idea of the job. Because that is usually the what gives you the most headaches in customer service, dealing with people!
Yeah. Well -- welcome to the 21st century.
Subject From a DC Ticket Agent—too funny!!!
IN SPITE OF THE DANGERS OF THESE PEOPLE RUNNING OUR GREAT NATION, ONE CAN’T HELP BUT LAUGH AT THEIR STUPIDITY.
A DC airport ticket agent offers some examples of ‘why’ our country is in trouble:
1. I had a New Hampshire Congresswoman (Carol Shea-Porter) ask for an aisle seat so that her hair wouldn’t get messed up by being near the window. (On an airplane!)
2. I got a call from a Kansas Congressman’s (Moore) staffer (Howard Bauleke), who wanted to go to Capetown. I started to explain the length of the flight and the passport information, and then he interrupted me with, ‘’I’m not trying to make you look stupid, but Capetown is in Massachusetts....’’
Without trying to make him look stupid, I calmly explained, ‘’Cape Cod is in Massachusetts, Capetown is in Africa ‘’
his response — click.
3. A senior Vermont Congressman (Bernie Sanders) called, furious about a Florida package we did. I asked what was wrong with the vacation in Orlando. He said he was expecting an ocean-view room. I tried t o explain that’s not possible, since Orlando is in the middle of the state.
He replied, ‘don’t lie to me, I looked on the map and Florida is a very thin state!’’ (OMG)
4. I got a call from a lawmaker’s wife (Landra Reid) who asked, ‘’Is it possible to see England from Canada ?’’
I said, ‘’No.’’
She said, ‘’But they look so close on the map.’’ (OMG, again!)
5. An aide for a cabinet member(Janet Napolitano) once called and asked if he could rent a car in Dallas. I pulled up the reservation and noticed he had only a 1-hour layover in Dallas. When I asked him why he wanted to rent a car, he said, ‘’I heard Dallas was a big airport, and we will need a car to drive between gates to save time..’’ (Aghhhh)
6. An Illinois Congresswoman (Jan Schakowsky) called last week. She needed to know how it was possible that her flight from Detroit left at 8:30 a.m, and got to Chicago at 8:33 a.m.
I explained that Michigan was an hour ahead of Illinois, but she couldn’t understand the concept of time zones. Finally, I told her the plane went fast, and she bought that.
7. A New York lawmaker, (Jerrold Nadler) called and asked, ‘’Do airlines put your physical description on your bag so they know whose luggage belongs to whom?’’ I said, ‘No, why do you ask?’
He replied, ‘’Well, when I checked in with the airline, they put a tag on my luggage that said (FAT), and I’m overweight. I think that’s very rude!’’
After putting him on hold for a minute, while I looked into it. (I was dying laughing). I came back and explained the city code for Fresno, Ca. is (FAT - Fresno Air Terminal), and the airline was just putting a destination tag on his luggage.
8. A Senator John Kerry aide (Lindsay Ross) called to inquire about a trip package to Hawaii. After going over all the cost info, she asked, ‘’Would it be cheaper to fly to California and then take the train to Hawaii?’’
9. I just got off the phone with a freshman Congressman, Bobby Bright from Ala who asked, ‘’How do I know which plane to get on?’’
I asked him what exactly he meant, to which he replied, ‘’I was told my flight number is 823, but none of these planes have that number on them.’’
10. Senator Dianne Feinstein called and said, ‘’I need to fly to Pepsi-Cola, Florida.Do I have to get on one of those little computer planes?’’
I asked if she meant fly to Pensacola, FL on a commuter plane.
She said, ‘’Yeah, whatever, smarty!’’
11. Mary Landrieu, La. Senator called and had a question about the documents she needed in order to fly to China. After a lengthy discussion about passports, I reminded her that she needed a visa. ‘Oh, no I don’t. I’ve been to China many times and never had to have one of those.’’
I double checked and sure enough her stay required a visa. When I told her this she said, ‘’Look, I’ve been to China four times and every time they have accepted my American Express!’’
12. A New Jersey Congressman (John Adler) called to make reservations, ‘’I want to go from Chicago to Rhino, New York.’’
I was at a loss for words. Finally, I said, ‘’Are you sure that’s the name of the town?’’
‘Yes, what flights do you have?’’ replied the man.
After some searching, I came back with, ‘’I’m sorry, sir, I’ve looked up every airport code in the country and can’t find a rhino anywhere.”
‘’The man retorted, ‘’Oh, don’t be silly! Everyone knows where it is. Check your map!’’
So I scoured a map of the state of New York and finally offered, ‘’You don’t mean Buffalo, do you?’’
The reply? ‘’Whatever! I knew it was a big animal.’’
Now you know why the Government is in the shape that it’s in!
YES, THEY WALK AMONG US, ARE IN POLITICS,
AND THEY CONTINUE TO BREED.
Was it wrong?
I once had a chief engineer tell me, “Well, tell me a little about yourself”. I said, “Well, I’m 6’ - 2” tall and weigh 200 pounds.....” He laughed himself silly and offered a job! ;-)
One day after lunch(when I am usually sleepy), I had a young woman who looked straight ahead and talked in a monotone and was totally expressionless.
When my head nodded over, I jerked awake and went on. She didn't seem to notice.
After she left, I called a friend in personnel where she had last worked and without mentioning names(unethical), told her what had happened. I was embarrassed but amused.
She started laughing and said she knew who it was because one day when she worked there, a worker from the mfg. floor came running in ad said this girl had fainted.
The Personnel Dir. had come to his door and said "How can you tell?"
I wonder if anyone ever showed up at an interview with a dummy ??
They would all fit perfectly as government bureaucrats.
I have been guilty of not taking those interview questions seriously.
Especially the lame ones.
“If you could describe yourself as an animal, what would it be and why?”
I remember when I worked in a small POD, the regional director came down to interview a couple of people for a job.
One was an attractive girl and the other was an ordinary looking guy. We all knew the director tho he was in a different division from us. We talked to him after the interviews and all the guys told him we hoped he hired the girl.
Well he said the guy was a little better qualified but she told him she was a good cook. The job did not involve cooking but she got the job and sure enough about once a week in the morning, she would bring in fresh cooked sausage biscuits for everyone.
This was in the deep South and we all liked them.
Tales of for from and about the idiots who do get hired...
We had a guy come in and said he would do any job that needed doing. Then he said if the company said he was hired as a VP, the govt. would pay his salary and we would get all his work for free.
I’d like to bookmark your comment for future reference. I’m sure my family would love to hear these.
That actually doesn’t sound stupid. I knew a man who broke down in tears because, in the section for “who to contact in an emergency”, he had no one he could count on.
Fortunately, ministry lifted him up and he’s in a better place now. But the answer is actually reasonable if there is no one to help.
Some of those might have gone well in the right context. Others, I’m pretty sure they were hoping to fail so they could keep getting unemployment.
To anyone who complains about how a business is staffed: this is what employers have to sift through!
Sadly for someone like (both parents dead,only child) that isn’t so far fetxhwd. People take family for granted.
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